JRA

My kids (1 and 3) get on brilliantly with their grandparents and my only big concern with coming over to the ME is separating them.

Has anyone here been faced with a similar dilemma?

Millhouse

For me, the best bit about coming to the ME was seperating me from my child's grandparents (both sides).

They now visit for a duration of around one month per year. oh what happy days.

JRA

He he. Do we have some Dawsonesque mother in law jokes coming?

For me it is a challenging point.

Our oldest one really has a bond with his grandad.

kittycat1

Ok not quite the same but being away from my nephews and godchildren is really hard. I spoke with my nephew on skype at the weekend ( he's 3) and was teaching him to pull funny faces, he told me I was his best friend which bought a tear to my eye! Skype is a godsend and without it I don't know if I could bare it out here! They also think I'm some sort of movie star as I'm on the telly ( how cute).My other nephew is 2 and I haven't built as strong a bond with him as he was only 15months when I moved out here, which I would have done if I was in the UK. It is hard to be away especially when they ask when they are going to see me, and knowing that when I do go home I'll be running around like a blue arsed fly and will struggle to see them as much as I would like, but when you see them it just means you spoil them rotten.

Just make sure you teach your parents/inlaws how to use skype before you leave!

Millhouse

Yes, I can see how it would not be easy. Basically, the only solution is:

1) skype / messenger
2) frequent visits

That said, I don't get home to see my mum probably as much as I should (don't care about the others) as they call come out and pester us here.

Millsyisland

Yes it is difficult, but you've got to be selifish from your immediate family's point-of-view and if the move out here is best for you, your wife/husband and kids then go for it.

To stay in the UK or wherever purely for the sake of the grandparents or other family members is something that will fester in the back of your mind for years and I suspect you'd blame them for not going for it.

For my wife and I, we look at it from the fact that when we do go back once a year for at least 3 weeks, we stay with one set of grandparents so they get an intense period of time with the kids in particular (and we're more than happy for them to look after them as much as they like), and because they didn't live particularly close to us anyway, they probably see them just as much overall, just all at once.

Don't let anyone guilt-trip you.

tuga_2009

It wasn't easy...especially for my 5 yo son, i thin the 2 yo girls didn't even feel it, but Skype really helps!
Never thought of changing our minds about moving, but he suffered quite a bit, he even said "i hate this country, i want to go back to my grandparents!!!"
Now the kids are all adjusted and they all speak on Skype with the grandparents at least 3 or 4 times a week!
And it's a good reason to leave the kids with them when we go back, for a few days so we can take some time for ourselves!
The pros are much more than the cons.

seven seas

seeing the grandparents (however often per week/month/year) vs being able to save enough money for their education etc...


my heart says no but my brain says yes

Roadking

It's easy but you gotta be strong;

Just give the doddering ol gits a push and as they try to stabilise themselves, grab the kids, bundle them in a car and wheelspin away. Sorted!

The Dean

All you Skypers.............. do you Skype with the camera on or off? Good friends of Deanetta stopped using the camera as they felt it made everyone "miss them even more".

Millhouse

I only have the camera on if I'm naked.

kittycat1

and how do the inlaws react to that?

Millhouse

they are normally too busy moaning that the picture is too dark to notice