wildinvirginia

Either for meet up or localized chat online if that's all you fancy?

Farm girl with new baby just back from UK visit going nuts here not knowing anyone! Great neighbors but have you noticed how hard it is to break into established small communities where you're a 'be pleasant to' novelty but given everyone has friends from school or church, they don't have much need for new ones? Especially ones who speak funny, wont attend church just to make friends (sorry, got me faith but just not that hypocritical or able to get there if I was). Or maybe it's just me lol.

Anyways, just hoping. No time limit on this one.

ottotheboar

We are around 100 miles from you Farmville being the closest town. We found the same situation as you. My wife is a USC from the north and I am a Brit. The neighbours were and still are great but were clearly not "locals". The church is everything here and we did try to expose the children to religion even though we are not overly religious ourselves. After three churches we gave up. We tried a small Methodist church with around 20 in the congregation where the pastor did services for three different churches on Sunday, this was a dumping ground for dud pastors who stayed forever or if one looked promising he was moved on and up quickly. We then moved to a large Methodist church around 200 and this was a hotbed of politics and obsessed with raising money to send mission trips to Cuba and Central America. We the tried the Episcopal church which was mediocre. If you are new and go to a church they will load you up with all kinds of volunteer work. One piece of very good advice we did get from a local was don't be afraid to say no when asked to do something. We have 4 children and met other parents through the school and did develop friendships mostly with those who had moved into the area but it did take a while. I think the true locals are wary of newcomers as many have the mentality of staying in a 20 mile radius plus in our area education in the public schools is poor so if you have travelled and are college educated you are different. I have met around 4 brits over 18 years one just last week who was looking at one of my Land Rovers. Sorry to be long winded just trying to give you an idea of our experiance in rural VA

wildinvirginia

LOL - sounds very familiar. People are really really nice here - just doesn't go beyond the hellos and how are yous. Funnily enough, I went back to the small town we'd been living in before coming to the farm yesterday for a coffee and the lady who runs it actually got talking to me and asked if I wanted to join that town's Booster Club. Funny, while I lived there that was the only invitation I got too - and it was to do a load of voluntary "Reboot Our Town' stuff. It involved local politics and fundraising (thanks to my dad telling someone that's what i did for a job in the UK when he was there on holiday!) and I declined despite wanting to meet people because I know if there's one thing other then religious schism to lose friends it's local politics and fundraising lol Declined telling the coffee shop owner that the other person who'd invited me had asked me to investigate a Starbucks franchise and dropped me as soon as I said No, I favored flourishing small businesses lol Point proved I think.

There aren't any Mum type groups here but I have to say, although I'd go for the sake of my daughter and because some days I am that desperate to see a face that isn't covered in sweet potato or on a deer, just because I have a kid doesn't mean that's the only kind of people I'd like to socialize with. got talking to an older couple yesterday who were really interesting and friendly and at the end of the conversation .... they invited us to church lol How hard is it to say, Want to come over for a coffee or something other than church????

I am hatching a plan. It involves marching up to people and saying "I like goats and coloring in - do you want to be my friend? Want to come to my house?" Seems to work for kids ....

ottotheboar

If you are near Danville there must be a MOPS in the area. The good thing about it is you graduate out as your children do.

wildinvirginia

Nope, no MOPS. Thy did ask me to send them $30 to start one but I've advertised on so many sites canvassing interest, even spoke to the managers of all the clinics and services that provide stuff for mothers and children and they don't know of anything either. I think I am a bit of a rarity in being a SAHM in this economy (not because we're wealthy but because we're prepared to be broke for me to stay home!) and not to have family/friends already established.

Maybe I should print flyers and attach them to strollers as they barrel past me lol

jukes

I am in Asheville, NC, not sure how far that would be from you, probably much further than it looks on a map! moved here 6 weeks ago from England and have 2 kids 6 and 8 and another due in May!