amys

Hello

I know definately I will not be with my fiance for the holidays. It is so horrible. It does not feel like the holidays. Theres no joy at all. Now I can be the grinch. Actually my fiance should have been here with me in august but the consulate had some other agenda(they are making damn sure we will not be together for the holidays).

I would like to know if any other couples will be without each other for the holidays.

It will be sad to look at my christmas tree and wish he was here with me. I know I will be crying and crying during the thanksgiving dinner and christmas. I guess life sucks!!!!

I can't wait for the holidays to be over. Even antidepressants and doctors can not even help me feel better about the unfairly/injustice treatment we are getting.

amy

katesuiter1

I also think that I'll be lonely this Christmas. We've been waiting for TSC for 67 days, and although it's not a patch on your timeline, I still moan. But the fact is, we've done all we can do. We contacted his congressman, and we're waiting to hear from them as to why it's taking so long. All we can do is wait, but one way or another, I'm not going to let it ruin my Christmas. Yes, life does suck, but making yourself and others feel sad isn't going to help. Think of your son. You still have him with you, he's healthy, and look forward to opening your gifts with HIM. He needs you sane and happy, because any negativity you feel will also be felt by him. Do you want him to be miserable too?
I really feel for you, though, and good luck.
Kate. xxxxxxx

mrsstrickland

me too, i will be without my love these holidays, we were only talking today about how neither of us are in the festive mood, and apart from waking up and breathing we have nothing to give thanks for, he said he feels like scrooge and the grinch rolled into one, i myself are going to have to put up a tree for the kids but i really dont feel like doing that either, ive been without my hubbie now since feb, and it seems like forever, i wish the holidays were over, because you know what holiday time means, the INS aint working, all i can say lets welcome in january as soon as possible.

dee

amys

[QUOTE][SIZE=1]Originally posted by katesuiter1
I also think that I'll be lonely this Christmas. We've been waiting for TSC for 67 days, and although it's not a patch on your timeline, I still moan. But the fact is, we've done all we can do.


Thanks kate for the kind words. I will try my best to enjoy it. But it will not be the same. I have to tell my parents to put up the tree and decorate it. I have no motivation to even think about a tree now. He should have of got his visa but we are being held up unnecessarily. I also have a lawyer, congressman, and senators on the case. They are also blown away cause no one can get answers why we are under review.

Happy Holidays for everybody.
If you have your loved one with you for the holidays please cherish it and count your blessings. Just cherish that you have each other.

amy

amys

[QUOTE][SIZE=1]Originally posted by mrsstrickland
, and it seems like forever, i wish the holidays were over, because you know what holiday time means, the INS aint working, all i can say lets welcome in january as soon as possible.

dee

Hey dee maybe Jan 2003, a new year, maybe something good will happen for us.

amy

tparrent

Of course I WILL be with my fiancee for the holidays. That's what airplanes are for. The fares were even dirt cheap. I leave on Christmas and come back on New Years.

Is it impossible fo rthe rest of you to travel? Inconvenient perhaps but IMPOSSIBLE? Maybe it is and if so then you have my sympathies. Otherwise, get ye to a travel agent!

The INS and State Department do NOT control your entire lives. Rejoice in the love that has brought you together. Give thanks that you are NOT one of the millions of lonely people who have NOT found that right person yet.

You have a life. Live it.

Rete

You are separated by the actions of a government agency and in time your separation will be a thing of the past and you can and will have many years of holidays and special occasions together.

While I feel for your aloneness, I know that one day you will be together. My heart goes out to two very dear friends of mine I just learned will not be celebrating holidays with their children because of their children's action. One is a mother of an only child, a son. He married three years ago and has given her a granddaughter. But his in-laws don't care for her so she will be alone for Thanksgiving again and for Christmas because they will be with his wife's family. She decided she didn't want to be alone this holiday so she invited all the teachers who are alone like her to have Thanksgiving dinner with her this year. Now there will be four at her table but her heart breaks because her son and his family will not be not be with her. My other friend is the mother of twin sons. One twin lives at home still and the other is living with his girlfriend. The not live at home son invited his aunt and uncle and his twin brother to his home for Thanksgiving and excluded his parents. Why? Because his parents have stayed in contact with his former SO who is the mother of his son. These breaches are going to be very difficult to overcome while yours will disappear long before this time next year.

Whether you are the US citizen or the foreign fiancee/spouse perhaps you can prepare a special holiday meal that day and invite someone to your table who is alone and lonely. Your act of friendship and generously will ease your pain and theirs as well.

Just a few thoughts.

Rete

amys

Consulate is trying to make us seperate or trying to deny us. How can I live with this fact. We love each other so much. I can't live in India, my son who is american can't speak hindi. Everything will be different for both of us. I have a grea career and have my own house, parents live near me. I am very close to them emotionally.

I have spent alot of money already on lawyers. I spent alot on the initial petitioning and now I have a lawyer for the administrative review part. I might have to end up going there after all this to marry him instead. There will be more money down the tubes to satisfy the sadistic bastards at the consulate. I will live with him for 3 months to show these idiots we love each other.

So how can I have a life when my own govt is stopping me be with my love.
amy

Mrtravel

amys wrote:
    >
    > Consulate is trying to make us seperate or trying to deny us.

Did you actually get a denial?

How can I
    > live with this fact. We love each other so much. I can't live in
    > India, my son who is american can't speak hindi.

He could learn Hindi. My daughter moved to the US from Siberia before
turning, and picked up English quite quickly.

Everything will be
    > different for both of us. I have a grea career and have my own house,
    > parents live near me. I am very close to them emotionally.

How does this prevent you from spending the holidays with your fiance?

    >
    > I have spent alot of money already on lawyers. I spent alot on the
    > initial petitioning

You could have save on the initial petitioning.

and now I have a lawyer for the administrative
    > review part.

What has the lawyer actually done for the admin review?

I might have to end up going there after all this to marry
    > him instead. There will be more money down the tubes to satisfy the
    > sadistic bastards at the consulate. I will live with him for 3 months
    > to show these idiots we love each other.
    >
    > So how can I have a life when my own govt is stopping me be with my
    > love.

I recall hearing the exact same thing from another poster here.
They were bitching and complaining about the consulate and the INS and
the damn review.
They got through the admin review. The woman moved to the US.
She then left him....

If you are already under review, moving there, getting married, and then
filing I-130 is not going to eliminate the review.

Patrick

Do you actually read any of the posts? The people who will be away from there loved one at Christmas mostly have valid reasons. You really need to be more sensative to peoples feelings and situations. Unthoughtful twit!

Patick

sorry about the typo in the last sentence

A-Lee

Though the 2nd NOA came in on Nov. 18th, we are still always from him coming
here, so I too will be alone and without my spouse......Our first Christmas
like many of you and we spend it apart....unless the embassy over there
(Philippines) is quick, but I doubt it.........But I have family around like
many of you and though this does not stop the want of my spouse here with
me, it eases it....plus my hubby states - we have the rest of our lives
together............I wish that everyone could spend the holidays with their
spouses, but most it is not going to happen this year....but next must be a
brighter year for many of us.


"amys" wrote in message
news:[email protected]...
    > Hello
    > I know definately I will not be with my fiance for the holidays. It is
    > so horrible. It does not feel like the holidays. Theres no joy at all.
    > Now I can be the grinch. Actually my fiance should have been here with
    > me in august but the consulate had some other agenda(they are making
    > damn sure we will not be together for the holidays).
    > I would like to know if any other couples will be without each other for
    > the holidays.
    > It will be sad to look at my christmas tree and wish he was here with
    > me. I know I will be crying and crying during the thanksgiving dinner
    > and christmas. I guess life sucks!!!!
    > I can't wait for the holidays to be over. Even antidepressants and
    > doctors can not even help me feel better about the unfairly/injustice
    > treatment we are getting.
    > amy
    > --
    > Posted via http://britishexpats.com

Sthrnshrte

    >Is it impossible fo rthe rest of you to travel? Inconvenient perhaps
    >but IMPOSSIBLE? Maybe it is and if so then you have my sympathies.
    >Otherwise, get ye to a travel agent!

Well it WAS impossible for my husband and I to be together, I haven't been
employed in months and his boss wouldn't give him any days off. He has to
visit because I applied for a spouse visa to wait with him the UK, and while
that's under review (under review due to our lack of money) I cannot enter
Britain. So he has to visit. Impossible. No money, tied to job, trying to
prove ourselves to the British Consulate. It may be impossible for many others
to be with their spouses/loved ones as well.

Well, I'm selfish. Thanks to some temping jobs, and money from my church, I am
able to afford Pete a plane ticket. His boss has made his working life a
living hell (calling him stupid, blaming Pete for his own mistakes, not giving
him overtime yet requiring he work it), so Pete has decided to quit his job and
find work elsewhere. Responsible for him to fly over unemployed while I'm
still looking for a constant job also? Not really, as a matter of fact nobody
I know thinks it's a good idea. But we're blessed. We're very young and have
our parents who will grudingly allow us these two weeks together (albeit with a
guilt trip or two). So yay, I get Pete for two weeks. After that, I'm hoping
to see him for our first wedding anniversary in March, but that may take
another blessing.

So, more in debt to our banks, and more in debt to our already worn out parents
(who we live with to "save" our money), we get to hold each other and kiss
under the mistletoe. Well, the neighbor's mistletoe, we definitely can't
afford it now.

Ash (and Pete-UK)

Mrtravel

Patrick wrote:
    >
    > Originally posted by tparrent
    > > Of course I WILL be with my fiancee for the holidays. That's what
    > > airplanes are for. The fares were even dirt cheap. I leave on
    > > Christmas and come back on New Years.
    > >
    > > Is it impossible fo rthe rest of you to travel? Inconvenient perhaps
    > > but IMPOSSIBLE? Maybe it is and if so then you have my sympathies.
    > > Otherwise, get ye to a travel agent!
    > >
    > > The INS and State Department do NOT control your entire lives.
    > > Rejoice in the love that has brought you together. Give thanks that
    > > you are NOT one of the millions of lonely people who have NOT found
    > > that right person yet.
    > >
    > > You have a life. Live it.
    >
    > Do you actually read any of the posts? The people who will be away
    > from there loved one at Christmas mostly have valid reasons. You
    > really need to be more sensative to peoples feelings and situations.
    > Unthoughtful twit!

Did you actually read the post tparrent was responding to?
"valid reasons" to me are not whether or not her child can live through
the plane ride or can handle being exposed to poverty and disease in
India. It is quite possible to fly to see her fiance and not wonder
around the country exposing her child to diseases.

robclews

Well if its any comfort, just think how extra special 2003 Christmas will be.

amys

If I do see my fiance now, I can't get married cause we are under review for the k1. Then once I get a denial I have to go back in a month or two to get married. My job will kill me for taking alot of time off and plus finacially I am getting strapped with all these lawyer fees. Plane tickets will be almost $3000 for both of us and then an additional $3000 for another trip to get married. Thats why I can't see him now cause I might have to go back in a couple months to get married. Of course he can't visit me. I have to go there. I know money should not get in the way but eventually it will catch up. I have to be cautious and think this through.

Also the deepti woman, I would like to add that her fiance had a fair interview. The consular chief interviewed her fiance. SHe got the cheif to interview cause she did a pre-interview fax to Fred Polasky begging to grant the visa and not to hurt them. So she got what she wanted. SHe knew how to beat the system. I guess I am dumb and should have investigated more about how to beat the system.

I guess I did it wrong, I got an attorney to help filing. My lawyer at the time sayed do not contact the consulate at all. SO I listened to her and did not beg for the visa. I guess hindsight is 20/20. I should have gone with my gut instinct and should of emailed begging for the visa and not to harm us. I thought I was doing things right. I was wrong.

amy