mcjimbo

Hi all,

Well I’m not going to let the fact that we are awaiting our 2nd NOA hinder the planning of our wedding. Its funny we've got everything booked and paid for (rehearsal dinner, church, cake, flowers, reception etc) but we haven't really thought of what we want to do for our wedding ceremony.

We are having the wedding in large United Methodist church in downtown Milwaukee and should have between 120-150 guests. My fiancée is a little more religious than I, but she doesn't want a bible bashing ceremony. My sister made the mistake of having to many hymn’s, and the end result was not pretty, I’ve heard better death metal! A friend also had a singer, who sung 6 songs, 40 minutes later everyone wanted to get out of there!


So we are trying to think of good ideas for our wedding ceremony, and want it to me more memorable than showy and over the top.

We've both been to weddings that cost a fortune which didn't move either of us, and wedding that cost nothing that were very emotionally charged. So we just need some insight into what works, and what doesn't. In terms of vows, poetry, background music, possibly a singer etc. So I guess what I’m asking is advice and experience from those who are currently planning, or those who have been through there own wedding.

Thanks in advance

James

mcjimbo

We both really like this excerpt from the bible, and think we'll use it as a reading by my mum or Angies:

1 Corinthians
Chapter 13
1
1 If I speak in human and angelic tongues 2 but do not have love, I am a resounding gong or a clashing cymbal.
2
And if I have the gift of prophecy and comprehend all mysteries and all knowledge; if I have all faith so as to move mountains but do not have love, I am nothing.
3
If I give away everything I own, and if I hand my body over so that I may boast but do not have love, I gain nothing.
4
3 Love is patient, love is kind. It is not jealous, (love) is not pompous, it is not inflated,
5
it is not rude, it does not seek its own interests, it is not quick-tempered, it does not brood over injury,
6
it does not rejoice over wrongdoing but rejoices with the truth.
7
It bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things, endures all things.
8
4 Love never fails. If there are prophecies, they will be brought to nothing; if tongues, they will cease; if knowledge, it will be brought to nothing.
9
For we know partially and we prophesy partially,
10
but when the perfect comes, the partial will pass away.
11
When I was a child, I used to talk as a child, think as a child, reason as a child; when I became a man, I put aside childish things.
12
At present we see indistinctly, as in a mirror, but then face to face. At present I know partially; then I shall know fully, as I am fully known.
13
5 So faith, hope, love remain, these three; but the greatest of these is love.

Noorah101

Hi mcjimbo!

I've been thinking about the exact same thing! I know where I want to have a reception dinner/party, and have it all figured out with the manager of the restaurant (except for the date, of course). But I don't know what to do, if anything, for the ceremony.

Here's a question for everyone....do you know if repeating vows must be part of the ceremony? Or can you just go to the courthouse and sign the appropriate thing? Even if we go to the courthouse, will the JP (or whoever) make my fiance repeat a lot of things in English?

I was thinking of doing the "ceremony" part at the courhouse, simply to save him the embarrassment of having to stand up before a bunch of people and try to pronounce unfamiliar words, and not know what he's saying w/o a translator! And then just have a nice big party to celebrate that night.

Anyone have experience with what the process is at the courthouse?

And I'm sure you'll find something meaningful for your ceremony, mcjimbo .... whatever it entails, it will be your special day

Best Wishes,
Rene

Nassara

Hi I happen to be a event planner and I think if your going for elegant but simple .......have things that personalize for you and your fiance Somethings to consider .... poetry is good very good when written by the bride or groom or have a local "poet' write some for you ( poetry readings) background sax players , harpist
or even violins or the personalized CD and give away copies as favors, as for a singer try a college, for a better price or even a high school . I have even seen whole choirs at some events , that may be to much for you , Or if you into it go for the Theme Wedding ???? Ive seen 60's ,70's ,80's ,Futuristic ( really wierd) Tropical , CandyCarnival with those jumpy things , Fairytale complete with Flower faries , Country Western, brides riding in on horses, finally my most favorite Red Carpet wedding dress like stars the guest and wedding party are treated like celebs or royalty ( some couples even have a rented red carpet) really fun like Black tie but the key is whatever makes you guys happy and fits your life go for it .....like the Nudist Wedding makes good pictures Just Kidding Congratulations and good luck just have fun ,its the honeymoon that you'll remeber more anyway!!!

Nassara

Noorah
my husband and I had a courthouse wedding and a ceremony at a mosque The courthouse guy went really slow and let him repeat everything but it was funny because we were both crying and I could not get it right either so it didnt matter he was like ok whatever ,we skipped the big ceremony and had a HUGE recepetion at a nice place for friends and family. The thing that made it special at the courthouse was we took our witnesses and made lots of crazy pictures at the courthouse, I suggest even video taping it and having it available for the guest at the reception , or view at another time or maybe a collage of the pics on a easel or wall so the guest can see the real deal.

Noorah101

Thank you, Nassara,

So he does have to repeat things, eh? A video camera will definitely be in the works! That will be memorable!

Thanks for the ideas!
Rene

katnap8

Hi,

We had to repeat the part where it says I so and so, take you so and so to be my lawfully wedded husband to .....
We repeated line by line after the JP

GOOD LUCK and don't worry, we're both native english speakers and stuttered on a few words

Cheers,

Kat and Chris

Bluegrass Lass

Well, we've given this a lot of thought lately, esp since ours is coming up in a little over 7 weeks. We are incorporating the Unity Candle into the ceremony, and, as yet, have not included any readings, hymns or whatnot. We're getting married in a chapel, not a church, so it'll be non-denominational, but still Christian.

I think we're just going to stick with what the minster normally says, but add our own personal vows. We're trying to get those written this week. We want to keep it simple, short and elegant. No one likes sitting through long, drawn-out ceremonies anyway! We just want to get to the celebration (& the honeymoon of course!)

SecretGarden

Oh boy James, you have opened a can of worms on this subject! We have a unique perspective given the parameters in which we had to work----no time to share that right now as we have kids to put to bed, etc.......but........will do later!

Question though: Can you fit in a couple more guests? Mr. P. and I are only about two hours from where you will be, and Mrs.jar2b and Mark are in Milwaukee itself......we could have a NG meet-up in the middle of your wedding!

EEEEEEEEEEEEK!

Hugs,
~SG and Mr. P
(will be waiting eagerly by the mailbox....)

britt

you being an atheist, wouldn't have much to add on this one.

meauxna

But you, with catering by KFC, do?

mcjimbo

Thanks for the suggestions everyone. Keep them coming, its good to hear what others have done, and what has worked and what hasn't . I'm absorbing all these posts like a sponge!

One thing we are going to have in the ceremony is a "love feast"! Hahahaha I bet most of you went for the dirty option there. Anyway basically mid way through the ceremony while some music is playing everyone who attends will get a cookie and a soft drink of some kind and make a toast. I thought it was a bit odd initally but kind of like the idea.

Haggischomper

McJimbo, ours is going to be in chapel in Naper Settlement, Chicago. It will be a simple affair with only two readings - one from the bible, and a friend is going to read aloud the Robert Burns poem My Love Is Like A Red Red Rose as a nod to my Scottishness. We will also be wearing kilts but I doubt if you'll be wanting to go down that route....

britt

GOD loves KFC

SecretGarden

I have no idea what you're talking about. I never said or indicated in any way that I was an atheist. You must have me confused with someone else, and to be honest, I don't remember ever having any interaction with you whatsoever, unless of course you've developed some new screen name.

Did you have anything to add to help James out?

~SG