We want to be together, but what should we do?
Mar 2nd 2009, 2:56 am
#16
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Joined: Oct 2006
Location: Oakland
Posts: 664
Re: We want to be together, but what should we do?
... and now you want to marry? Very amusing! You already have "A LOT of debt" and you are looking for your parents to be joint sponsors? Are you working? Where did all the debt come from? Being heavily in debt is not the best way to start a relationship, let alone a marriage. If your parents haven't bailed you out yet, why would they consider joint sponsorship for a boy they barely know? They could end up being financially responsible for him for the rest of their lives! Have you fully thought this through yet?
From where I sit - and I'll be the first to admit this is none of my business and you're free to do what you want - it doesn't sound like you're making very good choices at this point in time.
Ian
From where I sit - and I'll be the first to admit this is none of my business and you're free to do what you want - it doesn't sound like you're making very good choices at this point in time.
Ian
Kind? Sanctimonious? Prick?Two out of three ain't bad!
Based on her posts it looks to me like the OP has her head screwed on. She's done way more research than a lot of the people posting on here, and is realistic about the options. No need to be a grumpy old git and rain on her romance.
Mar 2nd 2009, 4:12 am
#17
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Joined: Mar 2007
Posts: 4,059
Re: We want to be together, but what should we do?
Guess which Ian got out of bed this morning? Kind? Sanctimonious? Prick?
Two out of three ain't bad!
Based on her posts it looks to me like the OP has her head screwed on. She's done way more research than a lot of the people posting on here, and is realistic about the options. No need to be a grumpy old git and rain on her romance.
Kind? Sanctimonious? Prick?Two out of three ain't bad!
Based on her posts it looks to me like the OP has her head screwed on. She's done way more research than a lot of the people posting on here, and is realistic about the options. No need to be a grumpy old git and rain on her romance.
Mar 2nd 2009, 4:57 am
#18
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Joined: Jul 2002
Location: Richmond, VA, USA
Posts: 4,316
Re: We want to be together, but what should we do?
Guess which Ian got out of bed this morning? Kind? Sanctimonious? Prick?
Two out of three ain't bad!
Based on her posts it looks to me like the OP has her head screwed on. She's done way more research than a lot of the people posting on here, and is realistic about the options. No need to be a grumpy old git and rain on her romance.
Kind? Sanctimonious? Prick?Two out of three ain't bad!
Based on her posts it looks to me like the OP has her head screwed on. She's done way more research than a lot of the people posting on here, and is realistic about the options. No need to be a grumpy old git and rain on her romance.
Not telling the OP of the pitfalls of heading into immigration with loads of debt and after only spending a few months together online is doing the OP a disservice. This has nothing to do with "raining on her romance" -- it has everything to do with helping making sure she doesn't get in over her head. Immigration and romance are inherently at odds anyway, and anyone who believes otherwise is delusional!
~ Jenney
Mar 2nd 2009, 5:06 am
#19
MODERATOR
Joined: Apr 2003
Location: Phoenix, Arizona
Posts: 58,687
Re: We want to be together, but what should we do?
Ian wasn't the only person who pointed out that her massive debt will be a problem needing to be resolved before getting married. He wasn't even the first person to mention it; that was me (taking a bow). Although Ian doesn't like to sugercoat things, that doesn't make what he's saying any less valid or important. If anything, sometimes people need to hear the hard truth, whether they want to or not.
Not telling the OP of the pitfalls of heading into immigration with loads of debt and after only spending a few months together online is doing the OP a disservice. This has nothing to do with "raining on her romance" -- it has everything to do with helping making sure she doesn't get in over her head. Immigration and romance are inherently at odds anyway, and anyone who believes otherwise is delusional!
~ Jenney
Not telling the OP of the pitfalls of heading into immigration with loads of debt and after only spending a few months together online is doing the OP a disservice. This has nothing to do with "raining on her romance" -- it has everything to do with helping making sure she doesn't get in over her head. Immigration and romance are inherently at odds anyway, and anyone who believes otherwise is delusional!
~ Jenney
Rene
Mar 2nd 2009, 5:07 am
#20
Account Closed
Joined: Sep 2002
Posts: 16,266
Re: We want to be together, but what should we do?
I apologize if I'm posting this in the wrong forum, but we need some help.
I met my boyfriend on the internet about 4 months ago and he came to visit me for 3 weeks on the Visa Waiver Program (he's British, I'm American). We've both decided that we are pretty perfect for each other and want to be with each other on a more permanent basis.. but we're not sure how we should go about it. He's also at school in the UK and won't be graduating for a couple of years which makes things a bit more difficult if he came out here (unless he transferred or something).
So.. In our situation would it be easier for me to file for a fiance visa for the UK, marry him there and then try to get him back out to the US with me when he graduates?
Or would it be best for him to file for the K-1 visa over there?
Or.. What would happen if we got married in the US when he next comes over, then once he was back in the UK I tried to get him into the US to be with me.. Is that possible?
I met my boyfriend on the internet about 4 months ago and he came to visit me for 3 weeks on the Visa Waiver Program (he's British, I'm American). We've both decided that we are pretty perfect for each other and want to be with each other on a more permanent basis.. but we're not sure how we should go about it. He's also at school in the UK and won't be graduating for a couple of years which makes things a bit more difficult if he came out here (unless he transferred or something).
So.. In our situation would it be easier for me to file for a fiance visa for the UK, marry him there and then try to get him back out to the US with me when he graduates?
Or would it be best for him to file for the K-1 visa over there?
Or.. What would happen if we got married in the US when he next comes over, then once he was back in the UK I tried to get him into the US to be with me.. Is that possible?
I have deliberately refrained from participating in this thread. However, I will make a general comment that in immigration, there is often a sharp divergence between what you "want" and what "can be done." [I "want" 30 million dollars, but ...]
Be very careful -- I am often consulted after the fact when "want" overwhelmed "can be done" and the Immigration authorities were, a one of my daughters would say, "not amused."
My colleague J Craig Fong [on the general visa forum] and I have a name for this: "janitorial work" in which we try to clean up the mess.
Good luck in the future.
Mar 2nd 2009, 6:28 am
#21
Homebody
Joined: Jan 2005
Location: HOME
Posts: 23,182
Re: We want to be together, but what should we do?
Ian wasn't the only person who pointed out that her massive debt will be a problem needing to be resolved before getting married. He wasn't even the first person to mention it; that was me (taking a bow). Although Ian doesn't like to sugercoat things, that doesn't make what he's saying any less valid or important. If anything, sometimes people need to hear the hard truth, whether they want to or not.
Not telling the OP of the pitfalls of heading into immigration with loads of debt and after only spending a few months together online is doing the OP a disservice. This has nothing to do with "raining on her romance" -- it has everything to do with helping making sure she doesn't get in over her head. Immigration and romance are inherently at odds anyway, and anyone who believes otherwise is delusional!
~ Jenney
Not telling the OP of the pitfalls of heading into immigration with loads of debt and after only spending a few months together online is doing the OP a disservice. This has nothing to do with "raining on her romance" -- it has everything to do with helping making sure she doesn't get in over her head. Immigration and romance are inherently at odds anyway, and anyone who believes otherwise is delusional!
~ Jenney
