Rete

Marriage is more than just a piece of paper. It is a legal contract between two people. Outside of the cost for the license and the ceremony, dissolution of the marriage could be costly in terms of time and money.

Suppose some people here might view your advice as illegal as you are advocating they marry for a green card only which would be fraud.

Rete

Ranjini

I get this crap a lot but I have never had the time to address it before because I have been too busy with other things. This statement here is something I see bandied about a lot. And I think it’s time this misconception was put to rest. I am from a “third-world� country. To be quite truthful, I had better way of life in my country. So the natural question is, why did you come to the US? To be with the man I love, of course. And if we return to my country together today, we can have a much better quality of life than we are enjoying right now in the US.
In every country there are the haves and the have-nots. Even in a “third world� country such as mine. Social position and reasonable amount of money can buy you a lot of comforts in the East that people in the US can only dream about, unless they were fabulously wealthy. And how many of you on this newsgroup can claim you are? To talk about that would require a whole new post, and I’m not going there. We are still a democracy with a parliamentary system of government, back home. I do not come from a country with a repressive regime.
If it’s not for love, the reason anyone would leave their country and want to live in the US is for economic reasons. Professionally qualified people from many “third world� countries are known to live and work here because the US needs them and is prepared to pay them higher wages for their expertise, than they would receive elsewhere. There are similarly qualified people from Europe and many western countries that “have a good way of life� living and working here, for the same reason.
Many people on this newsgroup are probably from or married to people from the "third world" countries you speak of. And they probably read what you have written here and decide to ignore it like I have done all these years. But it can get to a point when such ignorance as you are displaying here can begin to get to you. I hope you are not suggesting that all the men an women from "third world" countries who came here to marry US citizens came here just for a better way of life and not for love?? Isn't that a bit insulting?? Sorry for the rant, but people do need to be enlightened sometimes...

souls canuck

hey leeane.. sadly, its not really a simple question.. and you cant just do whatever you like.. if you want to go for a visit, thats fine.. but as soon as you tell customs you are going to live there, which is what you want to do.. you will be denied entry most likely.... only so many ways to do what you want to do.. its tough, but them the rules. we do have a bit of an open door policy with the states to some degree, but thats changing every minute. not really sure what your situation is, but just pointing out what I know is all.

as others have pointed out, he can come here.. it takes a while as well.. and if he comes here as your "conjugal partner" then there may be an issue with him working right away.. so you'd be in charge of supporting him for awhile.

hope that helps.

jeffreyhy

Ranjini,

Why doesn't the same love coupled with a much better quality of life take you and your husband back to your country? There must be something about the US that convinces the two of you to stay here and suffer a lower quality of life than you could otherwise have.......

Regards, JEff

Ranjini

Jeff, I don't believe I said I was "suffering a lower quality of life". To say that would be absurd. I love the US, I find the people friendly and more broad-minded among other things. And being somewhat "westernised" (if you know what I mean) there is much that this country has to offer someone like me. I don't work, but I do enjoy having access to books at the well-stocked libraries over here, the theatre, the opera and such. For me that compensates for a lot that I miss, when we get homesick, as I'm sure many immigrants do, from time-to-time. My son and I both miss Cricket a lot. You must know how that goes, as I believe you are married to an immigrant yourself??
It's this stereo-typed misconception that people have about immigrants from "third world" countries. I know that there are many people who post on this group, who ARE married to men and women from "third world" countries who probably object to these blanket statements....

jeffreyhy

Ranjini,

OK, thanks for the clarification - I think I understand better what you were getting at when you wrote, "if we return to my country together today, we can have a much better quality of life than we are enjoying right now in the US."

You've just listed some quality of life items that you feel are better here in the US, so it's not so much that the quality is better in one place or the other, but every country is different and no one country has it all.

I agree with you, many of the '3rd-world' countries do have some very attractive aspects and are very worthwhile places to live. There are trade-offs to be considered and made, but not necessarily rejected out-of-hand.

Regards, JEff

Ranjini

Absolutely! You have expressed even better exactly what I had meant to say. The general impression appears to be that everyone in a third world lives in abject poverty and their one aim in life is to end up in the US
It's almost as if posters making uninformed comments about people from third world countries, don't expect them to be even reading this newsgroup because they think they couldn't do anything so civilised as understand or speak English!!
I think for the most part the others must be like me. Amused at such ignorance rather than insulted.....