Ninger78

I am only just starting the K1 application - only just filed the I-129f - so a long way to go yet.

I'm concerned about my employer finding out and what my rights are/or them just treating me different, once they find out that i'm hoping to leave for the US.

I have a great relationship with them and am well respected - I don't want that to change and obviously need my job for financial reasons to be able to do this.

Can anyone share their experiences and at what point in the process did you 'come clean' .

I work at a small local company, with colleagues who have mutual friends, so it is possible they could find out before I tell them

Noorah101

I can't see how they would ever find out unless you tell someone at work who spreads the word.

They won't find out from any immigration source. No one will be calling your employer to check references, for example. You will be listing your employer on many immigration forms, but no one will call the employer to inquire or double check anything.

Rene

Ninger78

It's just going to be word of mouth if they do. My family and friends know not to say anything but obviously someone may tell someone!

plus with it being such a small company they know a lot about me so it's difficult to hide the visits between my fiancé and I - although at the moment they just think he's a friend.

Also, when it gets to the stage for medicals and interviews I will need to take time off work. we have several points in the year when annual leave is not allowed - except in extreme circumstances.

I could obviously lie about everything, but I really am not a good liar at all!! If someone else doesn't give me away, I probably will do myself! I'm far too honest for my own good!!

It's all quite difficult as my best friend at work is my line manager and I'm already lying to him, which I hate!!

Noorah101

All you can do is avoid the topic for as long as possible, and then when it comes time for you to take time off for the medical and interview, be honest about it. Even if they fire you for some reason, you can still list the job on your resume.

In the USA, I don't know if they'd call an overseas employer just to get a reference (my guess is not). I don't know the policy in the UK, but here in the USA, you can't get a "character reference" anymore anyway...even if a potential employer calls your former employer, the most they can say about you is to verify that you worked there and for how long.

Rene

Ninger78

I guess i'll just have to see how it goes.

I really don't want to lose my job. Despite the fact i'm planning on leaving, I actually love my job. Plus without it, I wouldn't have the money to do all this. My fiancé and I certainly aren't wealthy and we need every penny we can get at the moment!

Brucky

I checked my contract and I had to give work two weeks notice. Which is what I did. I told nobody until that day. Job done

Ninger78

That's my other issue - I have to give 3 months! Once the visa is granted (hopefully) I only have 3 months to leave for the US. I suppose i'll just have to give them 2 months notice and they'll have to deal with it!

Noorah101

Once the K-1 visa is issued, it should be valid for 6 months from the date of the medical exam. That usually translates to be around 4 - 5 months validity, so you might still be fine. Otherwise, as you say, just give them as much notice as you can afford.

Don't give them notice before you have the visa in hand, though. You never know what could delay it, and you don't want to be jobless while waiting for the visa.

Rene

sir_eccles

I was pretty open with my work. They knew what was going on, all the holidays I was taking in the US etc. When I finally went in to my manager to hand him the formal notice letter he was all "I was wondering when this day would come".

Ninger78

That's kind of what I want to do - just be open and honest. I just don't want to make problems for myself by doing so

civilservant

Same here, everyone knew from the day I submitted the application - although it was hardly a secret since I'd got married and come back to the UK. When I finally left 14 months later I think everyone (including me) was relieved!

Ninger78

I think i'll see how the petition goes and when that has gone through i'll think about telling them. I'm not really sure how i'll keep it a secret in the long run. plus, I hate not being able to tell my friends how much in love I am

ian-mstm

I understand why you want to keep this sub rosa, but if you're already lying to maintain the illusion... then, with respect, I suggest you tell the truth immediately. If you don't, you'll end up hating yourself very, very quickly. Immigration isn't for the faint of heart... so trying to cover up is just going to cause you additional and unnecessary anxiety.

If you choose to keep lying, then I suggest you're not ready to accept the responsibilities of adulthood.

Ian

RICH

This brought back memories from 10 years ago!
I hooked up with the American girl who was in town to train some of the staff. We kept it fairly quiet, but enough people at work (friends) knew about it.

After about 6 months she changed jobs and no longer visited. I went to visit her in US. We got engaged there, and she filed the I-29f.

When I got back, I "came clean" at a dept Christmas meal. Explained I would be leaving in 6 months or so, but not giving notice. Boss was there too, and later we worked out an exit strategy of sorts. I kept them up to date with the progress, and only once my K1 was in hand, I booked a flight and gave official notice - about 3 weeks prior the flight. (Contractually I was meant to give more notice, but no-one cared).

I even got invited to a weekend lunch with the Chairman and bigwigs as I was a "Novelty" leaver

Hope it goes as well for you.

celticgrid

I'm at a loss as to why you think you would lose your job.

As far as I am aware 'thinking of handing in your notice' is not a valid reason for an employer to terminate in the UK.

As for them treating you differently, if that's the worst that happens, just live with it. You are embarking on a big journey where you are going to be treated differently in a much broader context. Better get used to it.