Apfelkuchen

As it's something I'm trying to make a decision about at the moment, I was wondering what people's opinions are about name changes after marriage - what option did you go for? Why? What do you think of the various options? etc. I'm interested in views from both men and women!

tonrob

I kept mine the same.

fatbrit

Either or is fine, but avoid the silly double-barrelled compromise at all costs.

Apfelkuchen

Did your wife? If she had done/did so would you/did you care?

Apfelkuchen

When you say 'silly', do you just mean that it sounds silly, or that the compromise is silly and that it is more sensible just to choose one or the other? Or both?

fatbrit

Sounds.

sir_eccles

The Wife kept her name, it's fairly unique plus she has a career and reputation. A double barreled name would have sounded extremely silly. That said, when we eventually have kids we will be doing the relatively traditional thing of having the mother's maiden name as an extra middle name.

Apfelkuchen

I will keep using my maiden name for professional purposes too, as I'd prefer to stick to publishing under one name. And I don't really want to have two different names (one professional and one private) as that seems like a lot of bother. But my fiance is very conservative and when we've discussed it in the past he has seemed a bit hurt that I didn't want to take his name. So I'm considering the double-barrelled option as a compromise, but I agree it will sound silly. Maybe I would get used to it over time .

EDIT: I should have said that it will sound silly with our particular names. I don't think all double-barrelled names sound silly. Come to think of it, when I meet people with double-barrelled names I never think they sound silly, but when my friends get married and take them on it does sound odd.

Captain Cheesestick

My wife was reluctant to take my name. She said the reason was, "complex" - which meant she was clearly taking the piss. Boy did I wipe the smirk off her face when little baby Zoster was born....

Apfelkuchen

Maybe I will try 'bargaining'. If I keep my name, he can name the kids. If I take his name, I get to name them. And I will go to town with it.

Blackmail is a completely sensible way to start a marriage, right?

Sally Redux

I kept my name for a while but it caused a problem once with flight tickets and it seemed more trouble than it was worth so I changed it.

Captain Cheesestick

It's certainly better than the old way of giving some bloke a cow and a barrel of soy beans on the agreement he'll let you knob his 12 year old daughter.

IT really makes one wonder why Republican Presidential candidates want to go back to that so badly.

Apfelkuchen

Good point. I will note that one down for use in future arguments.

sir_eccles

Never had that sort of issue. It's funny sometimes when telemarketers phone up and ask for Mrs Myname or Mr Hername. Pretty clear they don't know who they are talking to.

On the other hand there are some elder relatives that insist on addressing mail to Mr and Mrs Myname. These are the same relatives confused over why the Wife didn't insist on a bigger rock for her finger, you know as insurance

Elvira

I disagree that double-barrelled names sound silly. Some people are born with them; for others they represent a valid expression of dual identity.