JUST FOUND OUT MY AMERICAN GF IS PREGNANT, WE WANT TO BE TOGETHER!
#31
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Joined: Dec 2009
Posts: 11
Re: JUST FOUND OUT MY AMERICAN GF IS PREGNANT, WE WANT TO BE TOGETHER!
He said he will get proof of paternity so there must be some element of doubt there, or it may be he wants complete guarantees which is reasonable enough too.
After all, I bet if 99.9 per cent of people on here got a call from an overseas lover saying hey guess what Im pregnant, the thought would cross your mind wouldn't it.
After all, I bet if 99.9 per cent of people on here got a call from an overseas lover saying hey guess what Im pregnant, the thought would cross your mind wouldn't it.
Thank you so much for all your help and advice! It really is great to hear from people who have actually gone through the same, or similar experience as me. My parents and friends think that it's really strange and unusual to want to be with someone so far away. I guess that's just the way love works though!
I will go and read the wiki entry explaining the K-1 visa process, but I guess I just wanted to get clarification from people on the forum about their own process of the experience. Also just reading the raw explanation can be slightly daunting.
I just have one more question, and I think I know the answer, and will go directly to reading the K1 instructions shortly but just want clarification of something...
Her parent's house will have 7 people in there including me and excluding the baby. The combined income on the affidavit of support from my fiance and her friend will be $90,000. Is it possible to use the sponsor AND my fiance's income (as the sponsor's income alone will be $70,000). As far as I'm aware, the 2009 povery guidelines for 125% above income threshold are $41,587. Additionally I'm am not going to declare the child on the I-129F form, but would it be a mistake to include a letter which explains the situation?
Her friend has offered us to move in with her whilst we settle down and possibly find a place of our own, but she planning on moving fairly soon but we can't put that address on the I-129F form because she hasn't found somewhere else to live yet and might take a few months to find a property she likes.
I'm assuming that it would be ok to put on the form where it says 'address where you will be living' as her parent's address then?
I do have an additional question; does an entire medical history need to be submitted from yourt GP, or is it just proof of vaccinations which are needed? I have recently been referred to for counciling on behalf of my GP for cognitive based therapy due to mild depression. I just wouldn't want this to have an impact, as it does say 'mental health refferal' on my medical notes and it doesn't look great!
p.s. and going to read the K-1 guidelines NOW and will be asking my fiance to file the I-129F this weekend and will be sending her the $455 fee.
Last edited by something_missunderstood; Jan 22nd 2010 at 7:24 am.
#32
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Joined: Dec 2009
Posts: 11
Re: JUST FOUND OUT MY AMERICAN GF IS PREGNANT, WE WANT TO BE TOGETHER!
Cave Empto - Latin, Let the buyer beware.] A warning that notifies a buyer that the goods he or she is buying are "as is," or subject to all defects.
(According to http://legal-dictionary.com).
Well, I do trust her very much and have no doubt that I am the father.
(According to http://legal-dictionary.com).
Well, I do trust her very much and have no doubt that I am the father.
#33
...
Joined: Sep 2004
Posts: 1,165
Re: JUST FOUND OUT MY AMERICAN GF IS PREGNANT, WE WANT TO BE TOGETHER!
Well basically I was going to get a paternity test if it was a requirement for our child to get dual citizenship, but agentpeppermint says that it's not required. Therefore, I wouldn't need to request a DNA test, as I don't have any doubts that I would be the father. Some people might think this is foolish but that's how much I trust her.
Thank you so much for all your help and advice! It really is great to hear from people who have actually gone through the same, or similar experience as me. My parents and friends think that it's really strange and unusual to want to be with someone so far away. I guess that's just the way love works though!
I was aware of this, it's just that she doesn't appear to be super fantastic at doing research, and I will be the one talking through the process her though the process. This might sound patronising to her a little bit, but it is the situation, lol.
I will go and read the wiki entry explaining the K-1 visa process, but I guess I just wanted to get clarification from people on the forum about their own process of the experience. Also just reading the raw explanation can be slightly daunting.
I just have one more question, and I think I know the answer, and will go directly to reading the K1 instructions shortly but just want clarification of something...
Her parent's house will have 7 people in there including me and excluding the baby. The combined income on the affidavit of support from my fiance and her friend will be $90,000. Is it possible to use the sponsor AND my fiance's income (as the sponsor's income alone will be $70,000). As far as I'm aware, the 2009 povery guidelines for 125% above income threshold are $41,587. Additionally I'm am not going to declare the child on the I-129F form, but would it be a mistake to include a letter which explains the situation?
Her friend has offered us to move in with her whilst we settle down and possibly find a place of our own, but she planning on moving fairly soon but we can't put that address on the I-129F form because she hasn't found somewhere else to live yet and might take a few months to find a property she likes.
I'm assuming that it would be ok to put on the form where it says 'address where you will be living' as her parent's address then?
I do have an additional question; does an entire medical history need to be submitted from yourt GP, or is it just proof of vaccinations which are needed? I have recently been referred to for counciling on behalf of my GP for cognitive based therapy due to mild depression. I just wouldn't want this to have an impact, as it does say 'mental health refferal' on my medical notes and it doesn't look great!
p.s. and going to read the K-1 guidelines NOW and will be asking my fiance to file the I-129F this weekend and will be sending her the $455 fee.
Thank you so much for all your help and advice! It really is great to hear from people who have actually gone through the same, or similar experience as me. My parents and friends think that it's really strange and unusual to want to be with someone so far away. I guess that's just the way love works though!
I was aware of this, it's just that she doesn't appear to be super fantastic at doing research, and I will be the one talking through the process her though the process. This might sound patronising to her a little bit, but it is the situation, lol.
I will go and read the wiki entry explaining the K-1 visa process, but I guess I just wanted to get clarification from people on the forum about their own process of the experience. Also just reading the raw explanation can be slightly daunting.
I just have one more question, and I think I know the answer, and will go directly to reading the K1 instructions shortly but just want clarification of something...
Her parent's house will have 7 people in there including me and excluding the baby. The combined income on the affidavit of support from my fiance and her friend will be $90,000. Is it possible to use the sponsor AND my fiance's income (as the sponsor's income alone will be $70,000). As far as I'm aware, the 2009 povery guidelines for 125% above income threshold are $41,587. Additionally I'm am not going to declare the child on the I-129F form, but would it be a mistake to include a letter which explains the situation?
Her friend has offered us to move in with her whilst we settle down and possibly find a place of our own, but she planning on moving fairly soon but we can't put that address on the I-129F form because she hasn't found somewhere else to live yet and might take a few months to find a property she likes.
I'm assuming that it would be ok to put on the form where it says 'address where you will be living' as her parent's address then?
I do have an additional question; does an entire medical history need to be submitted from yourt GP, or is it just proof of vaccinations which are needed? I have recently been referred to for counciling on behalf of my GP for cognitive based therapy due to mild depression. I just wouldn't want this to have an impact, as it does say 'mental health refferal' on my medical notes and it doesn't look great!
p.s. and going to read the K-1 guidelines NOW and will be asking my fiance to file the I-129F this weekend and will be sending her the $455 fee.
Do you know what it is like for a woman going through pregnancy for the first time ? The best place for this young woman is at home with her parents, she has just left her teens and now finds she is carrying a child before she has had much time to grow herself. I wonder if you had some selfish motives in getting her pregnant and now wanting her to leave her family home and become a burden to her friend who already has two little ones to look after.
Do you not think this could put a big strain on their friendship ? Grow up young man, life is not a game.
Stop thinking of yourself, and if you cannot restrain from sex before marriage at least have the decency to use a condom.
Anyway what's happened has happened and children are a blessing.
I hope you love this young lady, do right by her by getting married, and get your visa so you will be in the position to be' there for and provide for your young family.
Good luck.
#34
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Joined: Dec 2009
Posts: 11
Re: JUST FOUND OUT MY AMERICAN GF IS PREGNANT, WE WANT TO BE TOGETHER!
Was this mild depression diagnosed before or after you found out she was pregnant ? It seems before jumping in and taking all this on board you need to sort yourself out first. Raising a child and leading a family is not an easy task, though it can be very rewarding.
Do you know what it is like for a woman going through pregnancy for the first time ? The best place for this young woman is at home with her parents, she has just left her teens and now finds she is carrying a child before she has had much time to grow herself. I wonder if you had some selfish motives in getting her pregnant and now wanting her to leave her family home and become a burden to her friend who already has two little ones to look after.
Do you not think this could put a big strain on their friendship ? Grow up young man, life is not a game.
Stop thinking of yourself, and if you cannot restrain from sex before marriage at least have the decency to use a condom.
Good luck.
Do you know what it is like for a woman going through pregnancy for the first time ? The best place for this young woman is at home with her parents, she has just left her teens and now finds she is carrying a child before she has had much time to grow herself. I wonder if you had some selfish motives in getting her pregnant and now wanting her to leave her family home and become a burden to her friend who already has two little ones to look after.
Do you not think this could put a big strain on their friendship ? Grow up young man, life is not a game.
Stop thinking of yourself, and if you cannot restrain from sex before marriage at least have the decency to use a condom.
Good luck.
Clearly I can't feel the exact same emotions of a young woman who is pregnant for the first time. We talk for hours on the phone about it every day and night. We both agree that it's not at all going to be an easy task, and yes we were rather foolish and irresponsible to not use a condom! I'm sure we are not the first people on the planet to be in this situation and let's not forget that it does take two people to get pregnant and she does not seem to be overlly phased about having a child. I think we are both to blame for the situation. She works with children and babies on a full-time basis so is probably in a better position than most when it comes to being a new mother. I know that it's a completely different kettle of fish to have someone else's children to look after than your own, as it's not possible to walk away and hand them back at the end of the day!
My fiance's friend is 42, and currently has one child living at home with her, she has already raised 2 children previously with her ex husband. It could potentially put a strain on my fiance and her friend's but we are only looking at this situation as a purely temporary basis if living with her parents became a problem in anyway for her. Her friend is extremely empathetic towards our situation. I will be marrying her in order to go over there and support her, spend the rest of our lives together and raise a family. I want to do the right thing! If she does want to carry on living with her parents that's fine by me and it would be a good place to be for support for her from everyone around her. Since finding out that we don't need a place to live for just us, it is not an issue.
I didn't have any selfish motives for wanting to get her pregnant. It would have been a much easlier situation for the both of us if she hadn't of become pregnant, and if anything this has made things more complicated. I do love her VERY much and will stand by her to financially and emotionally support her with everything she needs.
Last edited by something_missunderstood; Jan 22nd 2010 at 9:32 am.
#35
...
Joined: Sep 2004
Posts: 1,165
Re: JUST FOUND OUT MY AMERICAN GF IS PREGNANT, WE WANT TO BE TOGETHER!
The mild depression was diagnosed before we found out that she was pregnant. I realise that the situation does very much look like I am jumping into the deep end but considering the situation the only way I can actually be there for her is to get married under the K-1 option. I am aware that the situation will mean I will have to do a lot of growing up very fast.
Clearly I can't feel the exact same emotions of a young woman who is pregnant for the first time. We talk for hours on the phone about it every day and night. We both agree that it's not at all going to be an easy task, and yes we were rather foolish and irresponsible to not use a condom! It does however take two people to get pregnant and she does not seem to be overlly phased about being pregnant and I think we are both to blame for the situation. She works with children and babies on a full-time basis so is probably in a better position than most when it comes to being a new mother. I know that it's a completely different kettle of fish to have someone else's children to look after than your own, as it's not possible to walk away and hand them back at the end of the day!
My fiance's friend is 42, and currently has one child living at home with her, she has already raised 2 children previously with her ex husband. It could potentially put a strain on the relatioship but we are only looking at this situation as a purely temporary basis if living with her parents became a problem in anyway for her. Her friend is extremely empathetic towards our situation. I will be marrying her in order to go over there and support her. I want to do the right thing! If she does want to carry on living with her parents that's fine by me and it would be a good place to be for support from everyone around her. Since finding out that we don't need a place to live for just us, it is not an issue.
I didn't have any selfish motives for wanting to get her pregnant. It would have been a much easlier situation for the both of us if she hadn't of become pregnant, and if anything this has made things more complicated. I will however stand by her and financially support her with everything she needs.
Clearly I can't feel the exact same emotions of a young woman who is pregnant for the first time. We talk for hours on the phone about it every day and night. We both agree that it's not at all going to be an easy task, and yes we were rather foolish and irresponsible to not use a condom! It does however take two people to get pregnant and she does not seem to be overlly phased about being pregnant and I think we are both to blame for the situation. She works with children and babies on a full-time basis so is probably in a better position than most when it comes to being a new mother. I know that it's a completely different kettle of fish to have someone else's children to look after than your own, as it's not possible to walk away and hand them back at the end of the day!
My fiance's friend is 42, and currently has one child living at home with her, she has already raised 2 children previously with her ex husband. It could potentially put a strain on the relatioship but we are only looking at this situation as a purely temporary basis if living with her parents became a problem in anyway for her. Her friend is extremely empathetic towards our situation. I will be marrying her in order to go over there and support her. I want to do the right thing! If she does want to carry on living with her parents that's fine by me and it would be a good place to be for support from everyone around her. Since finding out that we don't need a place to live for just us, it is not an issue.
I didn't have any selfish motives for wanting to get her pregnant. It would have been a much easlier situation for the both of us if she hadn't of become pregnant, and if anything this has made things more complicated. I will however stand by her and financially support her with everything she needs.
You seem to be on the right path and I truely hope you can be there for the birth of your child.
#36
Re: JUST FOUND OUT MY AMERICAN GF IS PREGNANT, WE WANT TO BE TOGETHER!
I was aware of this, it's just that she doesn't appear to be super fantastic at doing research, and I will be the one talking through the process her though the process. This might sound patronising to her a little bit, but it is the situation, lol.
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I'm assuming that it would be ok to put on the form where it says 'address where you will be living' as her parent's address then?
While your girlfriend may not be good at 'research', it would do you both a world of good if she - the USC - at least has a basic understanding of the process. Surely she would be amenable to at least reading the K1 wiki?
To your second question - think it's already been answered at length, but again - YES. If your circumstances change, that's fine, but for now, go with what you know.
#37
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Joined: Jan 2008
Posts: 41,518
Re: JUST FOUND OUT MY AMERICAN GF IS PREGNANT, WE WANT TO BE TOGETHER!
Not sure what that is supposed to mean - I suppose its a slight at my comments - but I am glad that the OP has trust in his relationship and believes his girlfriend. Until he has reason not too, its all good.
He said he will get proof of paternity so there must be some element of doubt there, or it may be he wants complete guarantees which is reasonable enough too.
After all, I bet if 99.9 per cent of people on here got a call from an overseas lover saying hey guess what Im pregnant, the thought would cross your mind wouldn't it.
I / we don't know his true situation and I am sure that his girl has been true and faithful but I think its a reasonable question to consider - though of course a very awkward answer to potentially have! Plus this guy is changing his life because of the new circumstances.
In any case, no matter, good immigration advise is being given on the basis he is the dad and good luck my friend
He said he will get proof of paternity so there must be some element of doubt there, or it may be he wants complete guarantees which is reasonable enough too.
After all, I bet if 99.9 per cent of people on here got a call from an overseas lover saying hey guess what Im pregnant, the thought would cross your mind wouldn't it.
I / we don't know his true situation and I am sure that his girl has been true and faithful but I think its a reasonable question to consider - though of course a very awkward answer to potentially have! Plus this guy is changing his life because of the new circumstances.
In any case, no matter, good immigration advise is being given on the basis he is the dad and good luck my friend
#38
Forum Regular
Joined: Dec 2007
Location: Fort Worth TX
Posts: 140
Re: JUST FOUND OUT MY AMERICAN GF IS PREGNANT, WE WANT TO BE TOGETHER!
considering the situation the only way I can actually be there for her is to get married under the K-1 option.
I didn't have any selfish motives for wanting to get her pregnant. It would have been a much easlier situation for the both of us if she hadn't of become pregnant, and if anything this has made things more complicated.
I didn't have any selfish motives for wanting to get her pregnant. It would have been a much easlier situation for the both of us if she hadn't of become pregnant, and if anything this has made things more complicated.
#39
Re: JUST FOUND OUT MY AMERICAN GF IS PREGNANT, WE WANT TO BE TOGETHER!
Additionally I'm am not going to declare the child on the I-129F form, but would it be a mistake to include a letter which explains the situation?
I'm assuming that it would be ok to put on the form where it says 'address where you will be living' as her parent's address then?
does an entire medical history need to be submitted from yourt GP, or is it just proof of vaccinations which are needed? I have recently been referred to for counciling on behalf of my GP for cognitive based therapy due to mild depression. I just wouldn't want this to have an impact, as it does say 'mental health refferal' on my medical notes and it doesn't look great!
p.s. and going to read the K-1 guidelines NOW and will be asking my fiance to file the I-129F this weekend and will be sending her the $455 fee.
Rene
#40
Re: JUST FOUND OUT MY AMERICAN GF IS PREGNANT, WE WANT TO BE TOGETHER!
Rene
#41
Re: JUST FOUND OUT MY AMERICAN GF IS PREGNANT, WE WANT TO BE TOGETHER!
www.uscis.gov
Rene
#42
Forum Regular
Joined: Dec 2007
Location: Fort Worth TX
Posts: 140
Re: JUST FOUND OUT MY AMERICAN GF IS PREGNANT, WE WANT TO BE TOGETHER!
but it doesnt sound like there was already a wedding date set in the first place... were they actually planning on getting married anytime soon?... or are they just getting married cos shes pregnant?... if it is indeed cos she is pregnant, then it may be a mistake rushing into marrage.
Anyway, I wish them both good luck
#43
Re: JUST FOUND OUT MY AMERICAN GF IS PREGNANT, WE WANT TO BE TOGETHER!
A note about the depression thing... my husband is a long time OCD and acute depression sufferer. He at one point could not leave the home and was on every benfit available to him. When I had met him, he had just spent the previous 10 yrs living in his bedroom and probably hadnt been past his front garden for the previous 5. It took 2 years of patience and understanding and he finally broke the cycle and now is as productive as he was before his 1st bereakdown, if not more. The knowledge of having a baby and a family, if this was what he really wanted, kicked him into gear and helped figure out his problems and work out better coping skills!
Dont worry about the mild depression, just get a letter from your doc ( the one who treated you for it )... My husbands stated something along the lines that his illness did not affect those around him and at no time in his life was he ever a threat to himself or anyone close to him. The doc also noted that over the couse of the past few years he had significantly improved. That seemed to satisfy the KB doc.
Dont worry about the mild depression, just get a letter from your doc ( the one who treated you for it )... My husbands stated something along the lines that his illness did not affect those around him and at no time in his life was he ever a threat to himself or anyone close to him. The doc also noted that over the couse of the past few years he had significantly improved. That seemed to satisfy the KB doc.
#44
Re: JUST FOUND OUT MY AMERICAN GF IS PREGNANT, WE WANT TO BE TOGETHER!
Sorry
but it doesnt sound like there was already a wedding date set in the first place... were they actually planning on getting married anytime soon?... or are they just getting married cos shes pregnant?... if it is indeed cos she is pregnant, then it may be a mistake rushing into marrage.
Anyway, I wish them both good luck
but it doesnt sound like there was already a wedding date set in the first place... were they actually planning on getting married anytime soon?... or are they just getting married cos shes pregnant?... if it is indeed cos she is pregnant, then it may be a mistake rushing into marrage.
Anyway, I wish them both good luck
Best of luck to the OP.
#45
Re: JUST FOUND OUT MY AMERICAN GF IS PREGNANT, WE WANT TO BE TOGETHER!
Her parent's house will have 7 people in there including me and excluding the baby. The combined income on the affidavit of support from my fiance and her friend will be $90,000. Is it possible to use the sponsor AND my fiance's income (as the sponsor's income alone will be $70,000). As far as I'm aware, the 2009 povery guidelines for 125% above income threshold are $41,587. Additionally I'm am not going to declare the child on the I-129F form, but would it be a mistake to include a letter which explains the situation?
A letter with the petition is not required (as I explained before) because these topics aren't a part of the petition adjudication.