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-   -   I have a serious question!! (https://britishexpats.com/forum/marriage-based-visas-35/i-have-serious-question-418340/)

CandynAngela Jan 12th 2007 8:00 am

I have a serious question!!
 
Hi everyone.. I am new here... But I have a problem.. My husband is from Wales.. I am American... We got married Dec, of 05.. Everything was wonderful... and then all the sudden he changed.. Now I know that I am not perfect.. But I really think I got false advertising with him.. So needless to say we are having major problems... He already has his green card.. and is now back in Wales for a "visit" He left on Dec. 6th. 2006 and was supposed to return Dec. 20.. He hasn't come back yet.. and no projected time... So my problem is.. I am really starting to think that he married me for the Green card.. Is there anything I can do??

Thanks for all your advice..

Angela

Dizzillusioned Jan 12th 2007 8:14 am

Re: I have a serious question!!
 
Can I ask why you didn't go with him?

CandynAngela Jan 12th 2007 8:17 am

Re: I have a serious question!!
 
We couldn't afford for both of us to go.. And he was really homesick at the time.. and I thought it would be good for him to go.. and get it out of his system... and hopefully come back and things might get better.. But since he has been there.. It seems to have gotten worse..

Dizzillusioned Jan 12th 2007 8:21 am

Re: I have a serious question!!
 
Oh dear, has he been in touch with you? or have you contacted his family? :mad:

CandynAngela Jan 12th 2007 8:24 am

Re: I have a serious question!!
 
I have talked to him a few times.. But it's usually me calling him.. :( I haven't had any contact with his family.. Because apparently they "hate me" ... I really feel in my heart.. that everyone was upset when he moved.. He was the life of the town.. and I think they are doing their best to keep him there.. it's really sad... I don't know why they can't support us and our marriage.

Dizzillusioned Jan 12th 2007 8:29 am

Re: I have a serious question!!
 
This is going to sound awful but it doesn't sound good, I doubt he'd marry you for a green card then return to Wales though. I sincerely hope he gets back to you. :(

St.Georges Girl Jan 12th 2007 8:30 am

Re: I have a serious question!!
 

Originally Posted by CandynAngela (Post 4274053)
I have talked to him a few times.. But it's usually me calling him.. :( I haven't had any contact with his family.. Because apparently they "hate me" ... I really feel in my heart.. that everyone was upset when he moved.. He was the life of the town.. and I think they are doing their best to keep him there.. it's really sad... I don't know why they can't support us and our marriage.

Have you met his family or ever been to his home in Wales?

CandynAngela Jan 12th 2007 8:31 am

Re: I have a serious question!!
 
He tells me that he is coming back.. whether we work out or not... Although when he was here.. and we would have a fight.. He would threathen to go back there.. and that he didn't give a **** about California or the United States... when I had asked him ... then why are you coming back here then.. He says because he wants to... I don't get it... :(

CandynAngela Jan 12th 2007 8:32 am

Re: I have a serious question!!
 
yes I have met his family.. and they treated me quite nicely... I was over there in 2005 for 5 weeks... Met everyone... I thought they liked me.. But now I guess they don't...

CandynAngela Jan 12th 2007 8:33 am

Re: I have a serious question!!
 

Originally Posted by St.Georges Girl (Post 4274081)
Have you met his family or ever been to his home in Wales?

yes I have met his family.. and they treated me quite nicely... I was over there in 2005 for 5 weeks... Met everyone... I thought they liked me.. But now I guess they don't...

St.Georges Girl Jan 12th 2007 8:41 am

Re: I have a serious question!!
 

Originally Posted by CandynAngela (Post 4274095)
yes I have met his family.. and they treated me quite nicely... I was over there in 2005 for 5 weeks... Met everyone... I thought they liked me.. But now I guess they don't...


Why don't you try calling them and finding out for yourself? Maybe when your husband isn't there? If it were me, I'd want to know the why's and wherefores, but that's me. If you love him, it's worth pursuing.

CandynAngela Jan 12th 2007 8:44 am

Re: I have a serious question!!
 

Originally Posted by St.Georges Girl (Post 4274129)
Why don't you try calling them and finding out for yourself? Maybe when your husband isn't there? If it were me, I'd want to know the why's and wherefores, but that's me. If you love him, it's worth pursuing.

I have tried instant messaging his mother.. But she ignores me.. I do love him... but I am so hurt by all the things he has said to me... That I don't even know if I want it to work anymore..??.. Does that make sense.. I guess it just gets to a point... Is it worth it? I feel like he has no respect for me.. And when I ask him if he wants to work things out.. he says.. "i do.. but i don't think it's going to work"... well what is that.. Of course it won't work if you have a negative attitude about it...

Miss Naughty Jan 12th 2007 8:45 am

Re: I have a serious question!!
 

Originally Posted by CandynAngela (Post 4274095)
yes I have met his family.. and they treated me quite nicely... I was over there in 2005 for 5 weeks... Met everyone... I thought they liked me.. But now I guess they don't...

Hi,
My heart goes out to you. I think you need to ask him where you relationship is going.
And ask him for a honest answer, unless you ask you will be thinking all sorts.

He could be home sick, however i can not understand why he is treating you like that just over homesickness.
My advice is to call him and ask him what is going on? why has he not returned yet? and is he planning on coming back to make your relationship work?

CandynAngela Jan 12th 2007 8:48 am

Re: I have a serious question!!
 

Originally Posted by Miss Naughty (Post 4274150)
Hi,
My heart goes out to you. I think you need to ask him where you relationship is going.
And ask him for a honest answer, unless you ask you will be thinking all sorts.

He could be home sick, however i can not understand why he is treating you like that just over homesickness.
My advice is to call him and ask him what is going on? why has he not returned yet? and is he planning on coming back to make your relationship work?

Oh my gosh I have... I ask him everytime we speak.. He says maybe he will be home at the end of January... But he doesn't know.. and He has left me with all the bills.. rent.. etc.. I am a waitress..and a mommy.. (we don't have any children together) and I don't make alot of money.. and I have been so stressed out trying to get everything paid.. I have been working doubles... and he doesn't seem to care.. he says well I am not living there right now... so you pay everything...

Dizzillusioned Jan 12th 2007 8:53 am

Re: I have a serious question!!
 

Originally Posted by CandynAngela (Post 4274166)
Oh my gosh I have... I ask him everytime we speak.. He says maybe he will be home at the end of January... But he doesn't know.. and He has left me with all the bills.. rent.. etc.. I am a waitress..and a mommy.. (we don't have any children together) and I don't make alot of money.. and I have been so stressed out trying to get everything paid.. I have been working doubles... and he doesn't seem to care.. he says well I am not living there right now... so you pay everything...


He's having a laugh, tbh I don't think I'd want a man like that in my life - doesn't help your situation though:(


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