BubbleChog

I know that you guys here will be able to understand this better than many others so here goes. I tend to be a lurker and reader rather than a poster but my head is too full and I need to get it out

Me and my TAS are currently filing for a K1 Fiancee Visa. I'm the UKC and he's the USC. Our i-129F has been accepted and I'm waiting for the next load of stuff from the London Embassy.

While I was visiting in the summer my TAS kept complaining about pain in his back and side. a couple of weeks ago he finally spoke to his doctor about it. The doc sent him off for an ultrasound which was inconclusive so he went for a CT scan. They've found a 'mass' on his liver. He's chinese-american and high risk for liver cancer so he's being rushed to a specialist.

We spoke briefly by skype and he looks so frightened and I want to go over but I don't think I can prove enough ties to the UK. We were originally planning for me to stay here while we do the visa thing so I could save money for the wedding and AOS. I feel so helpless and just want to tell this to some people who might understand.

Thanks for listening

Lx

S Folinsky

Sigh. You are helpless. And he has every right to feel frightened. Does he or you have a good friend who is a physician and whose abilities you trust? If so, she might be able to answer your questions. In a way, you may very well feel worse than he does.

Now is the time to lean on your friends. They will be quite understanding.

Good luck and Godspeed.

Jerseygirl

I am sorry to hear this...it must be a very worrying time for you both. I wonder if you could get a letter from his specialist to show to the US Immigration and board your flight to the US from Ireland...that way if you are refused entry you aren't far from home.

traceym

The last time I visited the US when we were applying for my Visa I had left work and sold my house so I was renting, not much proof that I was going back to the UK. I took my rental agreement, Car loan docs, log book, bank statements, a wedding invite, and copies of all my visa forms etc. I didnt need to use it because they let me in. If you want to go why not try to take a flight via Dublin where you clear immigration there at least that way if they refuse you its easier to get home. I'm so sorry it must be so hard for you.

BubbleChog

Thanks for the kind words. He's getting the next lots of results next week and we'll have a clearer idea of what we could be looking at.

Lx

BubbleChog

Hello

After a couple of weeks of tests and waiting for results the 'mass' on my TAS liver has been confirmed as a tumour. More waiting now while we wait for the next lot of tests to determine if the cancer is operable, though the experts I have spoken to tell me it is extremely unlikely. Primary liver cancer is not something it's easy to remain optimistic about.

So I have a question about the whole visa thing. Basically - what can I do? Is there a way of getting my Fiancee visa expedited or is my only option visiting and hoping?

Lx

Rete

How far along is the I-129F? Has it been approved and forwarded to the US Consulate?

Yes, you can try to get it expedited by your fiancee contacting his congressperson. He would most likely need to have a letter from his doctor as to his condition.

I'm sorry to hear of the diagnosis. What is the prognosis?

ian-mstm

This post is very uncharacteristic for me, so I want you (and the others) to know that I do not make it lightly.

I know this is probably something you don’t want to hear, let alone deal with, but have you considered your own long-term future? I spoke to my wife who has been an AOCN for 20+ years and heads the Palliative Care department at her hospital – and the prognosis for primary liver cancer isn’t good. Liver transplants for cancer are rarely done (although baseball legend Mickey Mantle was an exception and still died 2 months afterwards), and the time from diagnosis to death is usually less than a year.

I don’t want to infringe on your feelings at this point in time, but have you considered what will happen down the road if your K-1 is approved, say, within the next few months, you move to the US and get married, file for adjustment of status, and then your husband dies shortly thereafter. You’d be left alone in a foreign country with no support system whatsoever. Further, even your own adjustment would be at risk – although, to be fair, that can be overcome.

I can’t begin to imagine the anxiety you both must be experiencing, but you’re likely in a highly emotional state just now and I would advise taking a step back to examine the larger picture and your long-term situation.

I am very sorry – indeed, deeply sorry – that you and your fiancé are facing an uncertain future together. To be honest, if it was me, I’d continue with the plans we’ve been making together… but I’d also keep the reality of the situation in the back of my mind.

Ian

Rete

I didn't take offense at your response, Ian as it is realistic and not one that didn't cross my mind as well.

Bear in mind that the OP loves her Fiancee and I'm sure that she is up-to-date on the prognosis of his medical situation. I fully understand her need to be here in the US with him. To care for him and bring some happiness into his life while he is still able to enjoy it. When you are faced with this diagnosis, you want to fight it, are scared of it, and want to be with those that love you (after you have acclimated yourself to the ultimate outcome).

She can come here, marry him, file for AOS if she chooses, and then when their chapter together is finished, she can return home to the UK. Ask yourself back in 1998 if Sheila were diagnosed with uncurable cancer would you step away from her or rush to be with her and help in anyway you could to make her transition bearable? Honestly, I believe I know what you would do.

ian-mstm

Yes, of course I would have gone - and I believe BubbleChog will go also. I didn't suggest she "step away" at all - indeed, I suggested she continue with her plans.

Anyway, this is a difficult situation and I truly hope the two of them can find some comfort in the coming weeks and months.

Ian

BubbleChog

Rete
As Ian pointed out the prognosis for primary liver cancer is extremely bad. the 5 year survival rate is about 10% with most cases only lasting a few months after diagnosis.
He's got yet more tests coming up which will tell us just how bad the news is.
We filed the i-129F in August and received an acknowledgement later that month. I don't know how long it should be before I hear from the London embassy after that.

Ian
Believe me no offense has been taken by me either. I appreciate your straightforward advice to me and other people on the forum. I'm a medical secretary who supports a Public Health consultant speicalising in Cancer so I know all kinds of stats which I kind of wish I didn't right now. I am aware that I am likely coming to the states to nurse my fiance and then leave as a widow quite quickly. Would abandining an AOS stop me visiting the US in the future? I just don't want to come over and face overstaying and all kinds of other immigration issues if I can help it.

Thank you both
Lx

Noorah101

A normal K-1 process through London takes about 6 - 8 months total. It takes between 3 - 5 months to get the I-129 approved, then the case moves to NVC and then on to London.

Would abandining an AOS stop me visiting the US in the future? I just don't want to come over and face overstaying and all kinds of other immigration issues if I can help it.[/QUOTE]

An abandoned AOS will not prevent you from visiting the USA in the future. Just make sure you marry and file the AOS within your first 90 days in the USA.

I'm very sorry about your fiance. Best wishes to both of you.

Rene

randomgirl

This is so sad. I really feel for you both, what a horrendous situation...

I sincerely hope you get to be together very soon.

Best wishes,

RG.

BubbleChog

Update

*happy dance*

It looks like he's going to be OK. His tumour was operable and the doctors say they got it all and he should be fine.

So I can go back to worrying about USCIS rather than my TAS

Lx

randomgirl

That's fantastic news! Congratulations!!!

RG