knowledgepw

Please can someone give me some advice. My son has gone to America as a camp counselor. As far as I am aware he was given 4 months J1 ********* 30 days to travel. This takes him until late October that he has got to return to UK. Having read it seems he has had max j1 as camp counselor (for this year).

However he has met and fallen in love with an american girl. He can't stand the thought of being parted from her and wants to marry her.

What is his best way forward considering the fact he is already in the USA and at present doesnt have to leave until the end of October.

I am reading about visa's etc and really can't work it out.

A solid understandable plan for him would be appreciated.

britishspouse

If he wants to marry her soon he could do whilst in the US, and then return to the UK to start the CR1 process.

However if he hasn't known her long, what he may prefer to do is return home after camp, and begin the K1 fiancee process.

knowledgepw

hi thank you !! what is the cr1 process ??? i have read about the k1 finance process. he is so in love though and doesnt want to come back and leave her. I am reading in other places he can marry there and then apply for alteration of status. Is it not that simple ??

Nutmegger

If you head into the marriage-based section of the forum, you can read up on all the options. One query, if he needs his dad to sort this out for him, is he truly ready for the difficulties associated with an overseas marriage, especially as it seems that he is still at the lust stage?

http://britishexpats.com/forum/forumdisplay.php?f=35

knowledgepw

LOL, I am his Mum!! Yeah he may not be ready for it but I just sense he has met the right one!! and I'm not sure if I'm ready for a miserable love sick son home !!

Nutmegger

Sorry, wrestling with new specs and read pw as paw, as in vernacular dad! Sounds like a classic summer romance -- but some of those certainly do last past September. He is going to have to come home, though, any route that doesn't involve returning home initially is illegal. It will give him the chance to start saving the money he will need for all those fees! As you start your studying, the two options will be the K-1 or fiance visa, which means they will be apart as an engaged couple, or the CR-1, which means they could get married before he leaves the US, but then they are apart as a married couple as the paperwork wends its way through the official channels. What is his girlfriend's financial situation? She will have to show she can support him, or find a sponsor to chip in.

SanDiegogirl

I must agree with Nutmegger here, it does not sound like a good idea to be discussing visas with him at this stage.

As the Aunt of a Camp Counselor who is currently here on his J1 visa, if he decides that he has met THE ONE I'm going to be advising him on the job situation over here (bad), the health costs (high) and how love flies out of the window when poverty flies in at the door.

How old is you son? Even if he obtained a visa via marriage could he support himself in the US?

Rather a love sick guy at home than an out of work and out of money son 6,000 miles away.

Instead of you doing the research for him why don't you get him to do it?

Orangepants

Reminds me of when I was on a J1 when I was 20 in Virginia Beach. Madly in love - had a blast for the summer. Back to Uni in UK at end of September, forgotten his name by November!

SanDiegogirl

........ but ain't love grand

knowledgepw

His girlfriend has just graduated as a teacher and from a wealthy family. My son is also now shy of hard work. He is 20 so I guess I am just keep an eye that he doesnt start doing anything illegal with regards immigraion coz they tend to be a bit more carefree at that age. Wouldnt of thought British being in US or American being in Uk would be so compliated.

ian-mstm

That he "can't stand the thought" is evidence that his hormones are getting the best of him - certainly not the best time to be talking about remaining in a foreign country... and absolutely the worst time to be talking about marriage.

Sadly, part of the problem is that he's of the generation where instant gratification in so many areas of his life (read = instant access via the web) suggests to him that marriage and living in another country can also be instant.


Since you ask, I believe his best way forward is to leave the US at the end of his J-1 visa and, once removed, then consider his feelings.


US immigration is not for the faint of heart... and it can be a minefield. Your son is the one who needs to work it out. If he thinks it's going to be a walk on the beach, he'll be in for a rude shock. Also, there are real, hard financial decisions that have to be made... it isn't cheap, and his intended needs to be earning real money in order to sponsor him, or have ties to someone who will.

Ian

Bob

Get him to join and to research it himself...of if his OH is from a wealthy family, to speak to an immigration lawyer and go through the options.

At a guess, the J1 doesn't come with a 2 year HRR, but that's the first thing to check.

Read the wiki here, there's a good, simple to understand explanation of the K1 v CR1 processes.

SanDiegogirl

Just 20? Has not got a degree then?

This would make it even more difficult to get a decent, well paying position in the US. There is such competition today that unless he would be willing to get additional qualifications he is looking at minimum wage jobs.

Something to seriously think about before discussing visas etc.

sir_eccles

This a thousand times this. Go home, perhaps plan a vacation around Thanksgiving or xmas to meet her again.

Many of use who have been through this process spent many short vacations in each others arms separated by gulfs of time when we couldn't be together before we even got to the visa stage and the months you have to wait to be together finally. From my personal experience I feel it has made our relationship much stronger as a result.

IanR

If he is part way through a degree course, or has existing credits, a UK Uni might have a reciprocal arrangement with a US college near the GF.
Most of all he needs to obey the terms of his Visa.