jumping doris

They come and go. I took a long, hard look at things and realised that, although we may return to the UK one day, it isn't going to be soon.
All my family love it here and I was wasting my life being miserable.
That makes the process sound very simplistic but it wasn't.

clougherty family

I loved it in Perth at first, my OH was always homesick, but sometimes he was ok. I got a bit weird when some friends moved out and only stayed 5mths. I started to get bored with the place after about 8mths and it was a downward spiral from then on. I think in hindsight that even when we first got there I could never imagine myself not living at home in the UK again so we were probably doomed! In the end even the tiniest stupidest things in Perth annoyed me. I am very happy to be home and totally appreciate what I took for granted before. When we were first in Perth I kept saying that it was better for the kids with more to do, but in fact it's a load of rubbish. I've been out more places with the kids since we've been back than in the last year in Perth. The thing is, there's other people here to do things with and there seems to be more opportunity to socialise. We have been out and round to friend's more since we've been back than the whole 2 yrs in Perth. I think the last time I went out with the girls in Perth was for my Hen night in December 2005!! Ok, I was pregnant from Jan 06 till Oct, but even so, there was nothing doing there! I was worried about coming back, that I wouldn't like it and that I had rose tints on, but how ridiculous, we'd only been away 2 yrs, it's exactly the same as it's always been for the last 37yrs I've lived here!!

Jo

Hutch

Hi Lisa. I've heard a lot of people talk about some amazing period during which you're supposed to magically feel okay about your life and forget about the life you left behind. Well - it's a load of horse-shit - you know in your heart if somewhere's not right - and that's an end to it. I lived in the states for a while and after six months I was yearning for home. It was pre-internet days and I'd spend hours in the library pouring over imported copies of The Times to try and feel somehow connected with the UK. Life's too short to feel so desparately unhappy - make a list, start sorting things now, and get yourself back to the UK. You made it here, you've given it a bloody good go, and now you need to head home for the sake of your sanity. Best of luck with it.

northernbird

Absolutely Hutch. Life is indeed too short.

PS. The US was the pits for us too.

megansmummy

Totally agree hutch. Thinkimg of it that way is the reason i decided to go. I realised I couldnt carry on like i was.. My main thoughts were poss never seeing anyone again & what if i died in a place where i was unhappy. I then worked out which was worse for me - a few months grieving for my hubs or a lifetime of misery. I chose the latter!!

I agree too that there is no magical timescale on when you should start settling. I knew pretty much straight away, in fact i knew when i came on holiday the year before so i should have listened to myself then!! For me it just got worse & worse over those 18 mths till i reached the point where i just couldnt do it anymore

I know lisa how you feel as you & i have spoke to you a lot on this. I dont think how you feel is likely to change & i truly believe that you will be best at home. If your partner comes with you then all the better but please dont be unhappy anymore

I think the trouble is with so many of us on here is that we are/have been hanging on in there for the sake of a partner & thats not right as we too deserve to be happy. I know a lot of you are or will be lucky that they will come back too but for some of us like me then it wont happen & we have to put our feelings & happiness 1st

I truly hope lisa that you find some sort of ending to all this & you are happy again!

you know where i am if you need me
Lov judexx

chance to be

Very true.
When people say you havent given it long enough, what's the time limit? How long is a piece of string?
You've been there 17mnths. Thats longer than loads of us. Look at all you've achieved....you've successfully lived the other side of the world, you've built a house for goodness sake! How amazing is that?!
Youve given it a great go. If you still feel you need to go back, do so with your head held high, safe in the knowledge you have had more of an experience in these last 2 yrs than others might have in their lifetime.