cbernard

Hello,

It looks like our marriage is over and I need to start planning to move on. My wife is here on a K3 visa and I am looking for information on what the procedure is to get the divorce. I'm assuming her visa will be cancelled if we do the divorce, and I need to know how far my responsibility goes for her if she decides to try and stay, being that my name is on her visa.

She's been hanging around lately with some real losers who are filling her head with ideas on how she can work the system, and if she decides to ruin her life, I need to make sure she doesnt pull me down as well.

Basically, I just want out. Any help is much appreciated.

Best regards,

-Court

Leslie

Where are you at in the process? When did you get married, etc.

Rete

Court

I'm so sorry to hear your news. I remember how hard you worked to get her here and to be reunited.

As for the divorce just hire a divorce attorney and start proceedings.

I will tell you to protect yourself as much as possible. In this I mean both physically, financially and criminally. One way she might have to get around the divorce and to stay is to perhaps try to get adjustment based on abuse.

Good luck

Rete

Leslie

This is really sad.

I don't know you Court, you were here before my time. I'll bet there was a group that was going through it with you at the time though. I think of my buddies that are on similar time lines as me, it would break my heart to read this post from one of them in a year or two.

I know this NG is relatively young, so maybe it will be happening more and more, divorce is so common.

I'm sorry things didn't work out for you. I wish you nothing but the best.

Leslie

cbernard

Thanks. I took some steps before the marriage to protect myself financially, but thanks for the warning about the abuse part. Ive always been good to her but theres always a way to bend the truths, I guess.

cbernard

We got married overseas in October 2002, she has a K3 visa thats good until November 2004. Im on perpetual wait for I-130 approval. We never got a marriage licence in California, and never filed for adjustment of status per INS/BCIS/USCIS (i'm losing track of the name changes), who said she files after receiving I-130 approval.

cbernard

Thank you. My case is the typical story of getting into a relationship too quickly. I'm still hoping there will be some sudden change of heart and everything will be ok, but i'm pretty pessimistic about that at this point.

CharlieS

I have to echo Leslie's words. It would be incredibly sad to find that someone from here, that has shared so much with us would end up posting about their impending divorce.
I'm sorry you are heading that way, sincerely.

Absolutely seek a good divorce lawyer, possibly one that also knows their way around immigration. You were definitely wise to take certain precautions before the wedding, that can only prove helpful.

(and now I get vague)...I'm thinking you will need to contact the USCIS and inform them of the situation immediately. That way you are covering yourself from an immigration perspective.
As I'm typing this I think you really do need to seek legal counsel. I'm not a big fan of retribution, but I think you need to protect yourself from any eventuality, including the possibility of abuse accusations and even fraud.

I wish you the very best in this and hopes things are resolved painlessly.

Marilou920

Court, I know a guy who have similar situation like yours. He filed for
divorced and filed withdrawal of AOS at USCIS explaining that he and his wife
are legally divorced and had no interest in adjusting her status. The USCIS
send him a reply letter aknowledging the withdrawal and had also send a letter
to his wife that she should leave the country as soon as possible. She is
consider as an illegal alien. He had a lawyer do all this things for him. Good
luck.



    >Subject: Divorce / K3 visa
    >From: cbernard member1023@british_expats.com
    >Date: 12/28/2003 7:59 PM Central Standard Time
    >Message-id: <[email protected]>
    >Hello,
    >It looks like our marriage is over and I need to start planning to move
    >on. My wife is here on a K3 visa and I am looking for information on
    >what the procedure is to get the divorce. I'm assuming her visa will be
    >cancelled if we do the divorce, and I need to know how far my
    >responsibility goes for her if she decides to try and stay, being that
    >my name is on her visa.
    >She's been hanging around lately with some real losers who are filling
    >her head with ideas on how she can work the system, and if she decides
    >to ruin her life, I need to make sure she doesnt pull me down as well.
    >Basically, I just want out. Any help is much appreciated.
    >Best regards,
    >-Court
    >--
    >Posted via http://britishexpats.com

Dad of 3

CBernard:

The same thing happened to me. Got married on K1 visa though and then there was the divorce very soon thereafter. In a nutshell here is what I did.....

1. Immediately wrote to the local Immigration office where my soon to be ex submitted the AOS petition immediately withdrawing my support and request for all her immigration benefits and request they terminate processing her AOS package (including the work authorization if there is an application for that as well). I Included her Alien Number and case number on the letter if you have it. Because this is a K3 for you, you may want to SEND AN IDENTICAL COPY OF THE LETTER to the service center where you sent your I-130 Peition for Alien Relative which was required to be submitted prior to filing the I-129F in Missouri. You need to withdraw both petitions...

When I did this with a past marriage (adjustment of a K1), the benefits to me were two fold. First, because immigration had not adjudicated my ex's AOS or EAD petitions, they simply denied them both and I was not responsible for any kind of future support in the eyes of the US Government. If the former INS had adjudicated her petition, I was told I would have been on the hook for support a long time unless she left the US, became a citizen or worked for 40 quarters.

The second benefit for me was that when I applied for my current wife's K3, I attached a copy of all the correspondence from the old case with this new petition. Of course I really dont know if it helped or not but I had no problem or inquiries regarding the prior relationship with the adjudication of my current wife's I-129F Petition for K3 visa. (my current wife has not had her embassy interview so we are hoping that is not an issue there)

2. Immediately filed for divorce. Divorce is a matter of state law and is not tied into immigration law even though immigration benefits can ultimately be effected by the divorce. In my case, my ex spouse tried to use the I-864 to have me pay her alimony. Her attempt failed dismally.

3. In my situation, my ex wanted DESPERATELY to remain in the US no matter what, so she filed a "self-petition" under the Violence Against Women's Act (I-360 in Vermont) alleging I abused her during the course of our living together. I found out about it and sent four affidavits to the director of the unit that adjudicates those petitions in Vermont. The four affidavits were from people who knew me from my work, including an investigative supervisor with the local child protection agency I worked with, the mother of my children (who I was involved with for four plus years) and another person who knew us both. When she was unable to produce any evidence to support her false accusations, her petition was denied.

The key for me was acting quickly to protect my interests once I knew the marraige was over. Additionally, when I was called by a supervisor at the local immigration office from where I was living at the time, I was honest about the issues and just answered the questions she asked. As far as this contact with immigration was concerned, I was very pleased with the way they handled it and the assistance they offered to me.

Take Care and hopefully 2004 will be better.

Dad of 3

cbernard

Hello there

So Ive been laying low for a while, and havent been on this forum, but after some work and a LOT of patience, we're still together and getting along pretty well.

Stress was a huge factor in our problems. The INS/BCIS/USCIS/CRAP has put her I130 on hold due to what I believe is an address conflict (they never received my 3 change of address requests). she'd been keeping her feeling about this canned in, as her friends who have been in the same immigration situation are all happy with residency now, whil she still lives here as a non-immigrant alien.

She's started to understand the difference between true freinds and people who just want to mooch, and has since shunned those who have been taking advantage of her, and disrupting our marriage. I guess when you come to a new country it can be tough finding true sincerity amongst all the vultures out there ready to take and take.

I'm just happy we're working it out. Now if the INS would let us know why the I-130 is on hold, we'd be even more at ease.

Thanks

meauxna

cb,
glad you checked in and so happy to hear that things are on "OK" for now.
Congrats for doing the hard stuff and working it out.

wesleygolf

Seems like you were very fortunate under unfortunate circumstances. If she had adjusted status from the K1 you would have really been in a mess. I bet others havent been so lucky as to find out it wasnt working until it was to late. Sorry about what happened to you but at least you handled it right, and she lost her status here in the US. Good Luck

d_medina

cbernard

marriage is no peace of cake. I don't know what happened in your situation with the relationship, but if both are willing to work through your problems you can get over many of the bumps found in marriage. Marriage is not happily thereafter...it's a lot of hard work actually.

I like this website www.marriagebuilders.com. Some of it focuses on re-building a relationship after an affair. You can read the basic concepts, do questionaires, read the frequently asked questions or articles which are letters answered by Dr Harley. The basic information is available at the site for free or if you end up liking it look for the book at your library. You may like some of the suggestions or you may not, but it might give you something work on, perhaps a different view of how to work through marriage problems.

Take care...and I wish you the best.

Andrew DeFaria

wesleygolf wrote:

    > Seems like you were very fortunate under unfortunate circumstances. If
    > she had adjusted status from the K1 you would have really been in a
    > mess. I bet others havent been so lucky as to find out it wasnt
    > working until it was to late. Sorry about what happened to you but at
    > least you handled it right, and she lost her status here in the US.
    > Good Luck

My understanding is that if the AOS is not approved then the I-864 is
not enforceable anyway (I don't think it matters if it was the USCIS or
the old INS).

--
My wife keeps complaining I never listen to her ...or something like that.