Noorah101

Your plastic green card should come in the mail within a few weeks after your arrival. You currently have a temp I-551 stamp in your passport which is valid for 1 year, and is the same thing as a green card. So you actually have one form of the green card in hand right now, which would allow you to leave the USA and return, if you want to. But the wallet-sized plastic card should come in a few weeks.

Rene

chrisandjulie

Hi All,

After a few days of speaking to attorneys, thinking and doing research I'm turning to you all for your opinions of what I should do next.

I'm still in two minds as to whether I should go home or not, I've tried to put all the emotions of what has happened in the background to try make a decision. I have had a free and a paid initial consultation with an immigration lawyer so here is where I stand and where I'd like to hear what you think in your experience and opinions;

I'm here on a CR-1 visa so within the 2 years I would need to remove conditions as I won't be filing with my spouse. I don't really want to have to pay the approximate (possibly more) lawyer fees of $2500 plus, especially whilst I'm unsure of whether I can make it here (1. job wise and 2. without the girl i dreamt to be in the country with).

I presume I could file to change the conditions myself (saving paying lawyer fees) Does anyone have the links to this so I can read up on it or would i definitely need a lawyer to assist me? She also mentioned that it would be good to file those conditions before I file for divorce? Is that correct or does it not make a difference? I'm not sure whether she was just suggesting that because my wife could be difficult with me (i'm thinking sooner sign divorce the better?)

The divorce lawyer additionally said it wouldn't look good if i decide to remove conditions and i've returned back to england (my wife or soon to be ex is threatening to kick me out by end of the month).

Obviously the worry is that I won't get my greencard renewed. We don't have any shared assets in name, and the joint account didn't get set up in time due to how quickly i found out about the affair. The only proof of sharing finances is a utility bill i have from when she lived with me in england, i can also have some letters from previous landlord that i paid for julie to live at my tenancy in england. I have some letters from her family members (brother and sister in law and mother) saying that it was a proper marriage that they attending the ceremony and explaining how we met. I also have receipts for engagement and wedding rings that i bought, receipts for holidays, flights etc that I purchased. I have a video of our marriage ceremony. Is the information I have too limited, in your guys opinions what chance do you think I have of removing the conditions and securing the 10 year card? I don't want to take a decision to stay here if its going to be taken away from me in 2 years i'd rather just return to the UK and setup a life there. If I had some for of document of her admitting the affair would that assist me?

Unfortunately I need o make a decision quick, as I rely on her for phone, accommodation and car to get about. I'm thinking if it is a possibility to stay here I should move to a big city with a good public transport system; san fran, chicago, new york or DC.

Sorry for length of post but appeciate your thoughts.

chrisandjulie

Also forgot to add, I asked the USCIS when I expect to get my greencard, and they said 60 days after i enetered the states. I thought it was 10-30? Are they wrong? She said I get a welcome pack within 30 and 30 days after that will get my green card.

Is my greencard my "permanent resident card I presume"?

By the way I have found the i-751 forms...i'll be reading them in detail.

Look forward to hearing what you guys think

Mummy in the foothills

I'd call my old employer, ask if I can have my job back, pack my bags, and go home, filing a change of address at the local post office so any paperwork doesn't go to the ex. You can divorce from the UK.
Why would you want to stay in a foreign country where the only person you know just screwed you over and is throwing you out on your arse in a matter of days? She can pony up the Credit card to fly you home and get on with her sordid affair.
Salvage what you can and go home (Just my 2¢)

Noorah101

I'm not sure if the lawyer misinformed you, or if you misunderstood what he/she said, but a couple of things looked odd to my layman's eye.....

1. If you get divorced, you do NOT have to wait the full 2 years to file the I-751 to remove conditions. You can do it as soon as the divorce is final. This sentence seems odd to me: She also mentioned that it would be good to file those conditions before I file for divorce. If you are married, you have to be in a valid ongoing marriage in order to file the joint I-751. It doesn't sound like you can do that for the next 2 years unless you work things out with your wife. Otherwise, you have to get divorced and then file the I-751 with the waiver, anytime after the divorce is final.

2. This sentence also seems odd to me: The divorce lawyer additionally said it wouldn't look good if i decide to remove conditions and i've returned back to england (my wife or soon to be ex is threatening to kick me out by end of the month). If you get divorced and file the I-751 to remove conditions on your own, you won't be returning to England, you'll be staying in the USA. So that sentence doesn't make sense to me.

Many people have successfully filed an I-751 with waiver, with and without the help of a lawyer. Poppygirl and Milan76 are two I can think of offhand.

I still say there's no RUSH to make a decision. You are a US PR. You have the right to stay in the USA for up to the next almost 2 years. You should first decide what to do about your marriage/divorce, and then decide if you want to live in the USA or go back to England. There is NO rush to decide your immigration path just yet.

And as for when your plastic green card (and SS card) will show up, they give you the worst case scenario, 60 days. Reports from others have been that it takes several weeks, maybe a month or so.

Rene

Ginblossom

He hasn't said if he wants to stay in the States. (regardless of her)

If he does want to make a good go of it, then why not. In a few months, he might be free of this mess, and met someone else and its happy ever after.

Or getting the next flight home might be the best thing to do.

What does the OP want? Only he knows......

Elvira

I agree entirely.

I have no experience of waivers, but why would they grant it to someone who has been in the US all of 5 minutes and has never lived in marital union with the person who sponsored him. He might stay, get used to living here, get denied and have to leave the country.

On the other hand, it might work out - who knows. It's up to him whether he wants to take the risk. But to my ear he doesn't sound all together sold on this whole Living in America thing.

Ginblossom

Neither are you, but you stay. In terms of the OP, he hasn't had a great deal of luck so far has he! I think if he makes a clean break, perhaps heads off somewhere else, looks for a job, meets some new people and gets this mess out of his head for a bit, he will be fine.

As Rene says, he doesn't have to rush home. Its a continent, he can find somewhere new and better, and better people to be around. He left the UK after all, so he must have wanted to be there (albeit with the partner after all).

I think Rene is right, give it a bit, and then worst case, he comes back to the UK after a year or so. Least he gave it a fair crack. Running back now would just be defeatist. Its a big place, lots of people, lots to do.

Noorah101

Just putting my Mod Cap on for a moment to remind everyone to stay on topic from this post forward.

Thank you.
Rene
Moderator

meauxna

chris, my random thoughts...

I think it would be good for you to take time to make your decision; I said that before. We don't really know much about you to make the recommendation to stay or go (what type of work you do, lifestyle you like etc). My general thought is that if you want to give it a bit of a go, you should. It's a unique opportunity.

I have been wondering what your wife's father has to say about the whole thing. As I recall, he was the joint sponsor for your case. I wonder if your wife, and her father, understand what they signed up for.
Is your wife 'just' going through some temporary crisis, some brain fade? You two got *married*. Most people put some thought into that. This probably is not the place to hash all that out, but the quick change of mind on her part really makes me wonder what is going on with her.

By the way, she can not kick you out of your home. You should start documenting your life as much as you can.

I don't know what your current financial resources are, but if you can afford to move out from her place to some sort of temporary housing, that would be a good idea. craigslist.org has city-specific 'small ads' for shared housing that might be the perfect solution for now.

Regarding what to do about staying long-term, if you decided to, I'm very inclined to urge you to use a lawyer (maybe a different one that the immigration one you consulted with) for the I-751.
What your wife did was not right; sponsoring you (her spouse) and going through considerable effort to immigrate you here, only to pull the rug and tell you you are entitled to nothing. The purpose of the I-751 is to add another layer of difficulty for people who marry *solely for the immigration benefit*. I wouldn't be comfortable sending you off to document that case on your own, without significant study. Then again, you've got a couple of years to figure it out. You MAY apply to remove conditions on your own as soon as the divorce is final. But you might not be obligated to do so immediately.

There are options for you to stay here. Since it's a limited time offer, and you'd made the decision to move, I'd lean more toward staying here and giving it a shot than not, but that's just me.
You might go over and read some threads in the USA or Trailer Park forums and see what life here is all about. There are several folks who came over on a relationship and ended up staying here on their own.. maybe look up Manc and see what he says.

traceym

Chris,

The decision is yours and yours alone, i guess I know you a little better than people on here, I told my husband last night and he said how sorry he was, however, I told him what work you did and he says there call for that over here too. Maybe thats a starting point?

What would I do, I don't know, but I do know that even in a short time I have as much here, more in fact than I have at home, if I went back, no job, no house, no car etc, etc.

My only advice is dont rush, take your time and think about it, maybe it could be a whole new adventure. I do believe everything happens for a reason, that may not help now but maybe in time it will.

Again, you know where I am. Big hug xxx

chrisandjulie

I think one thing I'm worried about is whether I'd be able to deal with the mental pain of living here. I would probably like to give it a go, but I could just go home and get my life back on track.

Apparently my wife said she can kick me out as my name isn't on the lease of our rented accomodation, she said it would just need one call to the police.

I obviously don't want to stay in Vegas where she, him and all her friends are. So I'm trying to figure out which city I would go to.

I was thinking of going back to England, getting my head together, possibly applying for jobs in the US and coming back in a few months. But it still doesn't detract away from whether I would be able to stay in the US and that worries me, as if I couldn't I'd probably be best going back to the UK. I work in Renewable Energy.

I think I am enticed by America, but my main concern is not being able to stay here and that would just put off me getting my life back on track. I don't really know what to do. But she is making my life difficult, the car and the place we live is both in her name.

Her father is worried because he obviously doesnt want to be joint sponsor if we are divorcing, I'm still on decent terms with him so I pointed out that i dont think its his choice now as its already been signed.

I don't think I could return to the UK to my old job, I would feel utterly humiliated, also I don't think its very professional of me either.

Beleive me I can't understand her either, I can't beelive she has done something evil, its not jsut the affair, its asking me to come to america whilst she is still having the affair knowing i'm giving everything up. That in my eyes is pure evil. She has got to be going to hell. What makes this all unbeleivable she is a christian and the daughter of a pastor!

Anyway.....I don't want to be rushed into making a decision, but finances and getting my life/career back on track (as well as her threats) and pressuring me to make a decision soon.

I was thinking of getting a cheap flight to san fran to see what that city is like, have a few days break maybe.

traceym

If you fancy a trip how about hiring a car? The drive from Las Vegas to San Francisco through Death Valley is incredible, the scale is just impossible to describe, I was speechless (that doesnt happen often!) There is also one hotel in Death Valley it should be easy to find on Google, maybe a drive, a night there then on to San Francisco?

Hire a car then make arrangements to drop the car at SFO and taxi in. I stayed at the Argonaut Hotel Fishermans Wharf not long ago it was excellent and they are doing cheap room deals at the moment.

As for going home if you want to, do it, stuff what other people say or think, your real friends will be there for you.

As you said take your time and don't rush into anything.

Good luck x

ajcmals

IMHO Life is about choices, sometimes we make the right choices, sometimes we make the wrong choices... You swallow the red pill or the blue pill.

You have made the effort to come over here REGARDLESS of what's now happened. If were in your shoes I would give it a go here. It's possible that you will be able to stay here and although I am not clued up on the divorce implications, it would seem that through the friendly advice on here that you could stay permanently after 2 years if you can prove the marriage was entered in good faith...

Now I have only been here 10mths and it's tough I must admit. But I do see a lot of opportunity and if you want to, you can make it. What was it like back in England? Do you REALLY miss it already? No matter what England will always be your true home, so say in 3mths, 6mths, 12ths, 2 years then it doesn't work out? Go back home!

I obviously don't know what your finances are like but if you have a bit of ca$h maybe you should take a break in another city... Maybe our expat friends can advise, but I wonder if you could change your address with USCIS and have them send your greencard to that address?

Good Luck!

Rete

Chris

She can threaten all she wishes. While your name is not on the lease, your marriage is documented on both a certificate of marriage and on your immigration papers. I feel that your thoughts of going back to the UK, even if just for a short time, is a good one. You probably would be better to distance yourself from her.

Another thought is you are in Vegas. Having had a daughter who lived there for several years, there are plenty of apartments you can rent, furnished, for 3 to 6 months or an unfurnished apartment and rent your furniture (that is what she did) until you decide what you want to do.

If you want liquid funds that would be a good option as you can send out resumes and go on interviews while you are here. You are a resident with the right to live and work here. She cannot now turn around and say it was a marriage of convenience or that you used her. You have proof of what you gave up to come here and she is the one that married you and filed for your residency status.