So sad
 

My mum was over from Scotland for a visit like she has been for the last 4 years. We all look forward to this all year. The bad thing is when she goes home it really breaks my heart. I hate having to say that "goodbye" :( all over again. The kids really enjoy having her around and don't quite understand why we can't go visit her or she can't stay longer with us.

Anyway we have a good life here and our lives are so blessed in all other aspects but I just miss my mum. I figure you all would know how I was feeling and just needed to speak.

Sorry for boring anyone.

Julie

Re: So sad
 

Why can't they go and visit her?

Re: So sad
 

Why can she not stay a month or two. Flights costalotadosha for an OAP. Get your munies worth.

Re: So sad
 

Thank you for repling,

The kids can't visit her as they are only 3 and 6. My mum can't stay longer as she is a very independant woman and likes her own things around her. My mum also cared for my dad as he was sickly for along time so her time was so scheduled that I don't want to put that pressure on her to be somewhere for a set amount of time.
I think you misunderstand what I am saying anyway, i am just saying I miss my mum. Thats all, I just miss my mum and I am sure that all who have left loved ones back in the Uk know how I feel. Like I said at the beginning, I have a wondrful life here in Nova Scotia and we knew there were sacrifices we would have to make in moving countries but I am just saying you don't get used to saying goodbye. No matter how happy, content and assured that you have made the right decision you feel.

Thanks
Julie

Re: So sad
 

Time will fly, you see, she be back before you know it. Just keep busy withbthe kids and lotsa skype calls meantime.

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Are you drunk already muppet?

Re: So sad
 

Today I also did the I'm not crying it's my contact lenses, my sister blamed her watery eyes on the altitude, my Mum just blinked hard, my nephew said Aunty Piff where are you going? I said I wasn't going anywhere, he was going home, he wanted to stay in Canada. There were 6 of them all together, for the 1st time in 6 years, it was my Mum's bucket list trip. My BIL said we'll see you in 340 days:thumbsup:

I know how your feeling, it's utter crap, we had an absolutely FAB time though with hundreds of photo's, some of which may make it on here.


Our house feels so empty and quiet now....

Re: So sad
 

Big hugs to ya. Totally understand.

Re: So sad
 

Mums are pretty awesome to have around. OH's mum dropped off a home-made chicken pie for us today, which made our evening so much easier.

I'm pretty crap at sentimental stuff, what with being male, but I remember your strength that day, Julie, (the leg break incident) and how you coordinated everyone and comforted the nice lady with the broken fibula and tibia. You are a good, strong person and I hope you can all figure something out to make things a little less saddening and easier for all :)

Re: So sad
 

I deleted my comments as, after posting, I thought they would be construed badly, even though they were serious questions, as stated within the post.

I made the assumption I would not get a straight answer and thus you proved.

No personal attack was intended. Now let the thread resume. Apologies to thedignans.

Re: So sad
 

Some mums are awesome but not all of them. However, my heart feels like it's going to break everytime I say goodbye to my son. Two more years at university and then hopefully we won't have to say goodbye too often.

Hope you feel better tomorrow, it's not easy.

:)

Poppit

Re: So sad
 

I know exactly how you feel.

One of the things I miss most - back in the uk we stayed about 2hrs away from my parents. When my hubby was offshore, my mum used to come and stay with me for a few days and walk the dogs, do some housework, cook my supper when I was working. We had some really nice times then - its only looking back you realise how special they were.

Re: So sad
 

Thank you guys,

I think we are all so busy in our day to day lives we don't think to much of home and of families as it is to hard and depressing so we keep busy. However when we know they are coming we allow ourselves to get excited. We wait so long for them to come that when they do we fully embrace them and squash as much into their visit as possible.

This being said it makes their time go by much faster and you feel like they have only just arrived and it is time to go back to the airport with them.
Like I said before we knew the sacrifices we would be making when we made our decision to move, but it is still very difficult to say those "Goodbyes" however many times we say them.

I was fortunate enough not to have read the post made by Tangram, they were deleted by the time I got back on. But he/she should know that showing genuine emotion in this forum is usually a hard thing for people to do as they are aware that some people out there seems to take it as weakness and a chance to attack. For that reason I no longer post as often as I used to. I however don't think any post or question is a wrong one. People should feel free to ask away and share what they want without the fear of being mocked.

Anyway for the record I feel a bit better today and tomorrow a little bit better again, until my routine is back and I will then look forward to our visit to her next year.

Once again thanks for the kind words from you all, I appreciate them.

Julie

Re: So sad
 

Hugs Julie, it never gets easier does it, can completely understand what you are saying:wub:

Re: So sad
 

We all make sacrifices to live in another country. One of the big ones is, because the distances and expense, knowing that we'll probably only see our mums and dads four or five times before they die. It could be worse, we could have chosen to live in Australia or New Zealand and then realistically it'd be only two or three times. :(

Re: So sad
 

For the most part I agree with the above for some the visits by family can be even less.

I've lived in Canada for 48 years my sister visited once and other family members (aunts, cousins and a nephew) twice that 's it.

Some times convincing family who've never flown in their lives to come to Canada for a visit is an impossible task. Especially the older folk.

Re: So sad
 

Convincing those back in the UK that Canada does actually have warm weather plays a factor too. My family were amazed at how warm it was while they were here and had to go and buy shorts as all they had brought were jeans:rolleyes:

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That works both ways. I've come across people who think it's always foggy over there.:rofl:

Re: So sad
 

I hear ya! Father in law finally came over after four years. The first three days it rained on and off, and I was secretly thinking "oh shit" but we did tell him not to come in June! and he was muttering on. Then Alberta did it's thing and woah "oh, it didn't realise it was so warm here - this is lovely" :rolleyes:

Re: So sad
 

I know how you feel. My grown up children and grandchildren are all in the UK. I miss them so much, I love it when they come over, but the goodbyes kill me for weeks. I tend to go over there more as the parting seems easier some how, not sure why.

Look forward to their next visit and make the most of it. My Mum went to live in heaven with my Dad last year, I would have given anything for them to have come here, just once.

:wub:

Re: So sad
 

Almost echoes what my lot said. I told them not to come in June too...:rolleyes: Fairly pleased this lot of gloomy weather waited until they went :rofl:

Re: So sad
 

the last part of your post tugged at my heart strings, all i can say is your mum and dad are with your all the time and probably loving it!

Re: So sad
 

I dont get this, mum cant stay because she is independant ??? she likes her own things around her, but not her daughter or grand kids ??? Is dad still alive that she has to hurry back to UK ?? Sorry just dont get this.

Re: So sad
 

What is there to get? If you look and read closely you will see it is only a thread about a daughter missing her mum and not wanting to say goodbye to her again!
If you are going to look for other things within it then go ahead but most people are just taking as it is ment to be.
If you are really struggling with understanding then you should have just bypassed the thread and not bother commenting.
I am sure that most people know that these days it is a gamble as to whether to post or not for the fear of people mocking or reading to much into it. This is a free forum where you read the post and help if you can give if you can't then don't reply.
Sorry for the bluntness but I really think it need to be said out loud again.
Thank you for all of the rest of your kind words, I am feeling much better now and getting into my routine again.

Julie

Re: So sad
 

Well if you miss mum why dont you ask her to stay longer :confused::confused:

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Maybe it's the goodbyes more than the length/frequency of visits.:unsure:

Re: So sad
 

I feel your pain, my friend. My MIL came over for another visit at the beginning of June (in time for my hubby's 40th birthday)! We missed her so much when she left. Saying goodbye seems to bring back all those old questions about whether what we have done is worth what we have left behind etc.

My own mom has a flying phobia; so it is seriously unlikely that she will ever come over here. But strangely enough, I do not mourn that fact as much as I do when I say goodbye to someone at Pearson. I think it is the whole 'saying goodbye thing' that affects me more than anything else.

Hang in there it will get easier; and maybe put a pin in the calendar for her next visit - that's what my MIL does each time she comes over... She is even planning on braving a Canadian winter next time!! :ohmy:

It will hopefully get easier once your old routine kicks in, but in the meantime don't be too hard on yourself - you are allowed to miss your love ones.. :wub:

Re: So sad
 

I feel your pain, my 2 grown up kids have just gone back to the UK after a visit. I also get excited when they are coming, & we had a fantastic time together, but seeing them off at the airport is heartbreaking. They went home on Monday & I spent all day yesterday wondering if I really want to be here or go back to the UK to be near them again. These feelings usually pass in a few days, but at the time it sucks to feel like that. I hope you feel better soon.

Re: So sad
 

We have been here two years and my parents have been out twice, both times staying for 5 months - long enough for us to get well and truly into a routine of life with them here. I know how lucky I am to have such a great relationship with them, and that they can come for prolonged visits - they will be back here in September, but it always results in painful goodbyes. The way we get through it is to book their next trip staright away, we are then saying at the airport "see you in September".

I am lucky, but my OH parent's have not made it over here yet in spite of promises to do so. Circumstances have made it hard for them to be able to come, and at 78 and 80 they will not likely make many visits, if at all.

Yes, this immigration stuff is hard, we all feel it in our own way.

Sending positive thoughts to you Julie xx