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-   -   so bloody hard work (https://britishexpats.com/forum/maple-leaf-98/so-bloody-hard-work-729811/)

gary123 Aug 24th 2011 6:56 am

so bloody hard work
 
Hi

Been here three years , all settled etc , we have had some rough times, wife out of work etc money has been tight.

we moved just as the housing market collapsed so took a 30k hit on the house , so we where unable to pay off a credit card and and loan.

we have sent money back to pay these for the past three years , not running away form the debt , as many advised us to do , but we just can't do it any more ,

so i went bankrupt in the uk , as we just come to end of what we can do ,

as any one else been there..............

really really bad bad day, on the day i was made bankrupt ( today ) i had to take my wonderful dog to the vets to be put to sleep as she had cancer , so just so down it is untrue

for once you guys that circle the forum waiting to kick while some one is down , please hold off and let me get some good advice

Thanks

Gary

AmyDavid Aug 24th 2011 10:15 am

Re: so bloody hard work
 

Originally Posted by gary123 (Post 9578628)
Hi

Been here three years , all settled etc , we have had some rough times, wife out of work etc money has been tight.

we moved just as the housing market collapsed so took a 30k hit on the house , so we where unable to pay off a credit card and and loan.

we have sent money back to pay these for the past three years , not running away form the debt , as many advised us to do , but we just can't do it any more ,

so i went bankrupt in the uk , as we just come to end of what we can do ,

as any one else been there..............

really really bad bad day, on the day i was made bankrupt ( today ) i had to take my wonderful dog to the vets to be put to sleep as she had cancer , so just so down it is untrue

for once you guys that circle the forum waiting to kick while some one is down , please hold off and let me get some good advice

Thanks

Gary

Hi - I don't have any advice or such for you - just wanted to send you a virtual hug - what a bloody awful day. (())

dubbed Aug 24th 2011 1:08 pm

Re: so bloody hard work
 
Gary.

Fair play to you for posting that. Where abouts are you exactly? I don't mean street address :)

Tangram Aug 24th 2011 1:16 pm

Re: so bloody hard work
 
There's always someone worse off than you.

Keep fighting.

iaink Aug 24th 2011 1:21 pm

Re: so bloody hard work
 

Originally Posted by AmyDavid (Post 9578928)
Hi - I don't have any advice or such for you - just wanted to send you a virtual hug - what a bloody awful day. (())

Im not the hugging sort, but I could stretch to a virtual one under the circumstances.

Hope things get better for the OP:fingerscrossed: Not sure what advice we can offer. "Darkest before the Dawn" perhaps?

Almost Canadian Aug 24th 2011 1:31 pm

Re: so bloody hard work
 

Originally Posted by gary123 (Post 9578628)
Hi

Been here three years , all settled etc , we have had some rough times, wife out of work etc money has been tight.

we moved just as the housing market collapsed so took a 30k hit on the house , so we where unable to pay off a credit card and and loan.

we have sent money back to pay these for the past three years , not running away form the debt , as many advised us to do , but we just can't do it any more ,

so i went bankrupt in the uk , as we just come to end of what we can do ,

as any one else been there..............

really really bad bad day, on the day i was made bankrupt ( today ) i had to take my wonderful dog to the vets to be put to sleep as she had cancer , so just so down it is untrue

for once you guys that circle the forum waiting to kick while some one is down , please hold off and let me get some good advice

Thanks

Gary

What advice are you seeking?

Piff Poff Aug 24th 2011 1:49 pm

Re: so bloody hard work
 
I agree, it can be bloody hard work being a immigrant. I'm sending you a virtual hug too, so sorry about your poor pupster.

We also have had some horrendous times here, we've been really short of money, we have struggled over jobs, we've coped with deaths and things were finally looking to the ups and then another heart breakingly worrying phone call last night. I thank god all the time that my husband and I are as close as we are.

Put the bankruptcy behind you and feel the relief to have put that debt behind you too, you will now have a little more free money, which will make life a little less of a struggle, take time to lick your wounds and maybe now have a little break for a couple of nights and remind yourselves why you moved here.

You have done the kindest thing a pet owner can do and you have given your lovely pupster a loving home and quick relief from a potentially painful time.

Take care
xx

valefanincanada Aug 24th 2011 2:12 pm

Re: so bloody hard work
 
Hey Gary,
Can't give you any advise but I can wish you all the best for the future and don't let the barstewards grind you down.
All the best
Dave
:thumbsup:

Alan2005 Aug 24th 2011 2:49 pm

Re: so bloody hard work
 
Most people who go bankrupt actually feel a lot of relief that the stress is over.

Now, I usually used to go there to laugh at peoples misery, but you might want to check out the debt free wannabe forum on mse.

http://forums.moneysavingexpert.com/...splay.php?f=76

mardyarse Aug 24th 2011 3:10 pm

Re: so bloody hard work
 
“The worst bankruptcy in the world is the person who has lost his enthusiasm.”
H. W. Arnold quotes

*u*k it! its just money and in the grand scheme of things its nothing compared to what the bankers have done to this world!! Don't sweat over it, you've paid your dues, move onwards and upwards.

The sadness of losing a pet/family member however is immeasurable. Give yourself some time to grieve and slowly get back in the game. Job wise get stuck back in and get out there and something will come up.

Sending you lots of good luck and heres to a better future :thumbsup:

Almost Canadian Aug 24th 2011 3:23 pm

Re: so bloody hard work
 

Originally Posted by mardyarse (Post 9579417)
“The worst bankruptcy in the world is the person who has lost his enthusiasm.”
H. W. Arnold quotes

*u*k it! its just money and in the grand scheme of things its nothing compared to what the bankers have done to this world!! Don't sweat over it, you've paid your dues, move onwards and upwards.

The bankers have done the same as the OP; it's the governments that chose to bail them out. Don't underestimate how much a bankruptcy can affect a person, and for a considerable time after they have been discharged.

One wonders if your position would change if it was you he owed the money to.;)


Originally Posted by mardyarse (Post 9579417)
The sadness of losing a pet/family member however is immeasurable. Give yourself some time to grieve and slowly get back in the game. Job wise get stuck back in and get out there and something will come up.

Sending you lots of good luck and heres to a better future :thumbsup:

I agree with this. Time will tell whether the OP is able to avoid overextending himself again.

Gremmie Aug 24th 2011 3:32 pm

Re: so bloody hard work
 

Originally Posted by mardyarse (Post 9579417)
“The worst bankruptcy in the world is the person who has lost his enthusiasm.”
H. W. Arnold quotes

*u*k it! its just money and in the grand scheme of things its nothing compared to what the bankers have done to this world!! Don't sweat over it, you've paid your dues, move onwards and upwards. The sadness of losing a pet/family member however is immeasurable. Give yourself some time to grieve and slowly get back in the game. Job wise get stuck back in and get out there and something will come up.

Sending you lots of good luck and heres to a better future :thumbsup:

To the OP, sorry about your dog, I would also be devastated if any thing happened to my little puppy.:wub:
To mardyarse, thats the thing he has not paid his dues, and find it very callous you to just brush it aside with a " dont sweat over it". As the other poster said I bet you would be really pissed if the money was owed to you.

mandymoochops Aug 24th 2011 10:37 pm

Re: so bloody hard work
 
a little harsh there Gremmie, I think mardyarse was just trying to make the op feel better.

To the o/p - you tried your hardest by the sounds of it to clear off the debts, and although it didn't work fully, it's a dam sight better than running away - which you didn't.

I think the fact that your doggie has gone makes things seem worse - but I would totally take solace in the fact that you did your best and thats as much as anyone can do.

Look forward to the future, the past is gone. :wub:

Essay Aug 24th 2011 11:56 pm

Re: so bloody hard work
 
Gary123:

The pain of losing a loved one is not to be taken lightly and is not material for jokes or jibes. There are groups set up specifically to help people grieve the loss of a pet. If you or a family member has the sort of personality that would find comfort in a group, and you can't find one in your area, please PM me and I will try to help.

Bankruptcy is the honorable legal option when one cannot meet one's financial obligations. Running away and never owning up is dishonorable. That's why the laws allow us to declare bankruptcy. While the reality of bankruptcy can certainly gnaw at one's confidence for a while, remember it is both honorable (you didn't run away, you did everything you could) and *legal* (so the concept of having to "pay your dues" doesn't apply any further than following the process for bankruptcy). I know this first hand and did not feel "relief" until the bankruptcy was discharged and I was able to rebuild my credit (having regained some of my health as well).

Bluntly, any company owner who expects all of the customers to pay every last penny owed is delusional. Real life happens, and people with the best of intentions can find themselves unable to fulfill all of their obligations.

Almost Canadian Aug 25th 2011 12:30 am

Re: so bloody hard work
 

Originally Posted by Essay (Post 9580338)
Gary123:

The pain of losing a loved one is not to be taken lightly and is not material for jokes or jibes. There are groups set up specifically to help people grieve the loss of a pet. If you or a family member has the sort of personality that would find comfort in a group, and you can't find one in your area, please PM me and I will try to help.

Bankruptcy is the honorable legal option when one cannot meet one's financial obligations. Running away and never owning up is dishonorable. That's why the laws allow us to declare bankruptcy. While the reality of bankruptcy can certainly gnaw at one's confidence for a while, remember it is both honorable (you didn't run away, you did everything you could) and *legal* (so the concept of having to "pay your dues" doesn't apply any further than following the process for bankruptcy). I know this first hand and did not feel "relief" until the bankruptcy was discharged and I was able to rebuild my credit (having regained some of my health as well).

Bluntly, any company owner who expects all of the customers to pay every last penny owed is delusional. Real life happens, and people with the best of intentions can find themselves unable to fulfill all of their obligations.

I respectfully suggest that bankruptcy laws are usually designed to encourage entreprenurialism and not to provide and easy out for those that cannot live within their means (not suggesting the OP is one of those). It's a risk thing. If debtors prison
was introduced would people be more careful about how much debt they take on?

Of course, I am sure you would find it honourable if your employer declared bankruptcy owing you your salary.:p


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