Re: friends or acquaintances?
 

I count some of the people on here that I have never met as better friends than some people I have met in real life. Friends because they respond on the same wavelength, sharing both jokes and problems, people I wonder about what is happening in their lives. People I feel comfortable with.

Acquaintances are more distant, polite and pleasant but no more.

I think I'm going to give up trying. I'll get some more cats and save money and time by not washing.

Re: friends or acquaintances?
 

I don't think this is down to geography it is definitely an age thing.

As I have got older I have become less tolerant (about pretty much most things) but especially people. I have down sized the group of people I would call friends quite a fair bit as the years have gone on. The people in my life now are the people I genuinely care about and enjoy their company and I can tell them anything. I could call them at 2am and likewise if they called me I would drop everything to help/listen too.

The issue of making friends worries me most about the move truth be told.

Re: friends or acquaintances?
 

Another vote for age not location. Only because I've heard this same lament from expats to Nz, Australia, etc....also from kiwi friends who've moved to the UK and found it hard to make truly good friends like the ones back 'ome.

IMO true friends are very rare wherever you are.

Re: friends or acquaintances?
 

Me too, the older Ive got the more I realise the world is made up of idiots.

I think this is where the idea of "with age comes wisdom" comes from, its not that you are getting any wiser, its just that relatively speaking you realise everyone else is an idiot, so you must be the smart one:rofl:

Re: friends or acquaintances?
 

I have quite a few friends and loads of aquaintenances but I put it down to living in a small town (20,000) where everyone just about knows everyone else and most people can place a family's location anywhere in Nova Scotia just by their hearing their last name ;).

When we arrived here almost 4 years ago we knew no-one in Nova Scotia at all. I am in my late 40s and pretty outgoing but it still took a lot of networking/volunteering to get socially where I am today. Aside from one Scottish couple, all our friends are Canadian and we are a very social bunch of people :thumbsup:

Re: friends or acquaintances?
 

I think it is a sign of the times and not just a Canadian thing. People seem to be always busy, work longer hours, are generally stressed due to the large debts they carry, and spend hours commuting, etc. Remember the old saying, "a friend in need - is a pest".

Re: friends or acquaintances?
 

When you live more small town and work locally, people tend to have more free time, are very family orientated, community spirited and don't care who owns what size of house or vehicle so there is no competition to get into debt by having bigger and better. Must sound sugary sweet to some people but that's just how I find it here and it's a great way to live. :)

Re: friends or acquaintances?
 

I am the same.

It hasn't been helped by the fact that I haven't been working since I have been here so I don't even have any work colleagues.

I agree with those who say it is an age thing - you haven't got anyone close by who you went to school with, went out drinking with as a young'un, that kind of thing. And I think it does get harder to make friends as you get older.

Re: friends or acquaintances?
 

Can't be a small town thing as this village has 1000 people and the town I work in 5000.

The consensus seems to be old age, but what about the young people on here, have you made new friends? Local or expat?

Re: friends or acquaintances?
 

I'm young(ish) and although I know lots of people here, there is only 1 Canadian and a couple of British expats that I would really call friends. Everyone else I consider to be acquaintances and work collegues.

My very best friends that I talk to about everything are the friends I've had since school. Nobody here knows my personnal business, family stuff or anything else. I call my best friend in England to talk about this stuff.

Forging good friendships takes time to make a history between you, but even after 3 years here, I don't feel close enough to anyone to tell them my deepest, darkest secrets.

Maybe as you grow older you become more selective about who you would choose as a friend. You can 'see' people more clearly and you know what you like and what you don't. You learn who you can trust, and who you can't.
As I said, I know lots of people here, but I wouldn't want all of them as friends, for different reasons.

Re: friends or acquaintances?
 

I'm young ish. I have made a couple of good friends. Struggled for a long time, plenty of people becoming nodding aquaintances down the pub but that was about it.
Joined the Volunteer fire service last year and was able to meet the locals a couple of whom have now become very good friends, it takes time, our town is approx 1200 people.
I have also got a great group of expat friends that has evolved after arriving approx 18 mths ago.

Re: friends or acquaintances?
 

What am I, Scotch Mist?

Alright, I don't count. I can count on one hand the times I've been lonely and I don't care about being Billy No Mates.

Re: friends or acquaintances?
 

I have one extremely good friend here, but mostly I agree it's difficult to find good friends. Today on the bus there were a couple of guys talking about linux and shell scripting (geeky stuff basically) and I did my usual thing of butting into the conversation and trying to contribute to the discussion. It sort of work but I could tell they were slightly hesitant of me :P

Also don't get me started on how weird I feel about asking for a guys phone number for friendship. I was at a party once and one guy had the right approach, handing his phone to the guy and saying "Punch in your digits, man" after they'd had a good conversation. I still don't feel comfortable doing it though :huh:

Re: friends or acquaintances?
 

Some of the best friends I've ever made have been over here in Canukistan.

Re: friends or acquaintances?
 

I've never had to explain anything to Australians - they get it totally. Having said that I know lots of Canadians living in Australia and they're all brilliant too. I think it's more a case of making friends as an adult is harder wherever you are - but like you I just don't give a monkeys. I have good friends and I keep that number small on purpose.