British Expats - Agony Aunt question!!!

Why blokes letters dont get published in agony aunts' columns.....

Dear Deirdre,

I've never written to you before, but I really need your advice on what could be a crucial decision.

I've suspected for some time now that my wife has been cheating on me. The usual signs... phone rings but if I answer, the caller hangs up. My wife has been going out with the girls a lot recently although when I ask their names she always says, "Just some friends from work, you don't know them."

I always stay awake to look out for her taxi coming home, but she
always walks down the drive. Although I can hear a car driving off, as
if she has gotten out of the car round the corner. Why? Maybe she
wasn't in a taxi?

I once picked her cell phone up just to see what time it was and she went berserk and screamed that I should never touch her phone again and why was I checking up on her.

Anyway, I have never approached the subject with my wife. I think deep
down I just didn't want to know the truth, but last night she went out
again and I decided to really check on her. I decided I was going to
park my Elise next to the garage and then hide behind it so I could get a good
view of the whole street when she came home.

It was at that moment, crouching behind my Lotus, that I noticed a
leaking front shock absorber. Is this something I can fix myself or
should I take it back to the dealer?

Anon.