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Curse of the Expat

Curse of the Expat

Old Apr 12th 2012, 10:45 pm
  #31  
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Default Re: Curse of the Expat

Originally Posted by bigals View Post
I came here with $350k I am now seriously in debt,no work it sucks so I am going back to the UK where I have a job waiting.
I have some Brit friends here who are on the bones of their ass,he was earning 40 thousand pounds in the Uk here he gets $22k they have no money to go out or do anything and cry to me daily but still tell everyone at home it is sooooooo good here ,I think loads of expats up sell their move to prove they did the right thing!!!!
im calling bs.. that story is just wrong from every angle. average earnings are 71k in aus and with 4-5% unemployment in the major cities if you have work ambitions there is no problem to get going
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Old Apr 12th 2012, 11:20 pm
  #32  
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Default Re: Curse of the Expat

Originally Posted by nandnor View Post
im calling bs.. that story is just wrong from every angle. average earnings are 71k in aus and with 4-5% unemployment in the major cities if you have work ambitions there is no problem to get going
So what is your experience?
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Old Apr 13th 2012, 11:03 am
  #33  
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Default Re: Curse of the Expat

Isn't the 'real curse' of the expat returning home and not fitting back in despite trying; and then ping-ponging back or similar?

I deffo won't be doing that as we only left UK for OH's job 8 years ago, dissatisfaction with UK life simply was not any part of the reasoning.
Been in NZ for 5 of the 8 years and company have now given OH a job back in Blighty - yippee.

For every positive of life in NZ there is a massive downside
e.g. sunny = good skin cancer = bad

The biggest downside of all is the geographic isolation and that is simply sth which even unlimited money cannot solve.

I think I will relish the 'why did you want to come back here?' comments as they won't come from close friends and family anyway.
I feel no need to justify anything but like the educational approach others have mentioned.....but will probably hope to shut them up with 'because I love the UK and always have'

SO, so long as you remain happy with your decision, it doesn't matter what anyone else thinks and says.
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Old Apr 13th 2012, 11:09 am
  #34  
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Default Re: Curse of the Expat

Actually the average person here doesnt earn anything like 71k, the 'mean' figure is quite a bit lower than that. Also dont be fooled by the official unemployment figures, the idea that as long as you have ambition you will be fine is just ridiculous.

Originally Posted by nandnor View Post
im calling bs.. that story is just wrong from every angle. average earnings are 71k in aus and with 4-5% unemployment in the major cities if you have work ambitions there is no problem to get going
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Old Apr 13th 2012, 1:18 pm
  #35  
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Default Re: Curse of the Expat

Originally Posted by jonmof View Post
Been back in UK for over a year now. Loving being back but silly things still annoy me.

The weather I can handle, it's what makes the UK the UK!

What really gets to me is the constant need to justify my decison to leave Oz. No matter where I go I meet someone who has family there and they love it, so I must be wrong. I then find myself arguing with these people as they compare their life in UK with their relatives lives in Oz. Their rellies tell them it's womderful out there so once again, I must be lying.

Does anyone else have to justify leaving Oz?
Rant Over.
Some 'never left the country' UK people -the nastier variety- love to think you have returned because of one thing - you failed -whereas their relatives /friends out there who say they...'LOVE IT' have made it a wonderful, fabulous success.
In reality they are bitterly annoyed of you having achieved what they know they never could- that is live and work abroad.

Forget about it..its common.
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Old Apr 15th 2012, 11:58 am
  #36  
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Default Re: Curse of the Expat

I have been back 13 months now from Oz and have lost track of the amount of people who have asked why I wanted to come back to this ****hole, what about the beaches and the sun, blah blah blah.

None of my family and friends ask this, only strangers who have never been further than the Costa del Sol for a 2 week holiday and think living in a sunnier climate therefore means you have a holiday lifestyle of lying around the pool all day sipping Pina Colada's. They forget you have to go to work every day and for me as the years went on it became more boring once the novelty wore off as I am not a person to sit around on the beach and get fried!!

I have been to more places of interest to me this last year since I have been back than I did for years in Oz.

A show on ITV at the moment is Poms in Paradise, I haven't watched it but the title says it all.

Last edited by Beedubya; Apr 15th 2012 at 12:05 pm.
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Old Apr 15th 2012, 2:19 pm
  #37  
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Default Re: Curse of the Expat

I had one of these conversations with my neighbour in the pub on friday night who when finding out that we had returned from Vancouver last year said "You must be missing that!" I think she began to regret it slightly when I put her straight on this for at least 10 mins and I could have gone on for much longer but noticed her glazed expression . I don't think I managed to convince her though as she had visited Vancouver a few years ago and had long since dreamt of living there.

Funnily enough she said she had a Brit friend visiting from California next week who is very depressed and wants to return but can't due to teenage kids for most of the same reasons that I gave.
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Old Apr 15th 2012, 3:26 pm
  #38  
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Default Re: Curse of the Expat

Originally Posted by nandnor View Post
im calling bs.. that story is just wrong from every angle. average earnings are 71k in aus and with 4-5% unemployment in the major cities if you have work ambitions there is no problem to get going
and im calling you out !!! if you read my post #21 you will see that I am in Canada not Aus
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Old Apr 15th 2012, 4:29 pm
  #39  
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Default Re: Curse of the Expat

I was back last week for a fleeting visit with my sister and some meetings. I got the same response from people (except my sis of course!) "Why you want to leave California? It's so sunny"

I then respond with "Have you ever been there?" and of course no one has so I go into a 5 minute monologue about the state of the US and why Brits feel it's OK to belittle the UK when they've never lived overseas and they don't know how good they have it and maybe they should start viewing their country with a little more respect.......phew!!!!!

Anyway that usually does the trick!!! Glazed eyes, nervous cough and then "oh right....well I'd rather live here then..."

I'm sure I'm a bit harsh on poor old US but I really want to give them both sides of the picture when it comes to Expat life in the "good ol' USA" Is not all sunshine and tans.
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Old Apr 15th 2012, 5:05 pm
  #40  
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Default Re: Curse of the Expat

I`m sure if the boot was on the other foot I`d be saying the things they`re saying, but it`s only when you`ve lived in the other country you know the reality! Memo to self, take earplugs back or develop selective hearing!
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Old Jun 5th 2012, 7:45 am
  #41  
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Default Re: Curse of the Expat

Originally Posted by Jerseygirl View Post
If I'm asked why I would like to return to the UK I always say...'because it's home and the US will never be my home.' I don't normally get much of a response to that.
That's exactly what I tell people when they ask why I came back to the UK from the US after 23 years. "This is my home". Nuff said!
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Old Jun 7th 2012, 6:18 pm
  #42  
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Default Re: Curse of the Expat

Now I am back I have found that the Brits have been much more understanding than the Canadians. When I tell them that I feel at home, they just say how pleased they are to have me back and have helped me enormously.
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Old Jun 7th 2012, 7:13 pm
  #43  
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Default Re: Curse of the Expat

Originally Posted by Moggiemiss View Post
Now I am back I have found that the Brits have been much more understanding than the Canadians. When I tell them that I feel at home, they just say how pleased they are to have me back and have helped me enormously.
Yes, I've found this too. Although some people (usually strangers) start by asking 'why did you come back?' as soon as I say it's because I missed England, they seem really pleased. I wonder if most Brits secretly want to feel proud of their country but get conditioned by the negativity. I don't know if that's right, but I have been quite touched by the genuinely happy reactions people have when they realize you came home because you think Britain is better than wherever you were.
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Old Jun 7th 2012, 7:15 pm
  #44  
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Default Re: Curse of the Expat

Originally Posted by britwhore View Post
I was back last week for a fleeting visit with my sister and some meetings. I got the same response from people (except my sis of course!) "Why you want to leave California? It's so sunny"

I then respond with "Have you ever been there?" and of course no one has so I go into a 5 minute monologue about the state of the US and why Brits feel it's OK to belittle the UK when they've never lived overseas and they don't know how good they have it and maybe they should start viewing their country with a little more respect.......phew!!!!!

Anyway that usually does the trick!!! Glazed eyes, nervous cough and then "oh right....well I'd rather live here then..."

I'm sure I'm a bit harsh on poor old US but I really want to give them both sides of the picture when it comes to Expat life in the "good ol' USA" Is not all sunshine and tans.
It's interesting isn't it.....the grass is always greener. Before I came to live here in San Francisco I believed that California was a great place to live and I had visited the place a number of times before on vacation. Now after 18 months here in SF I'm ready to leave for ever. Makes me realize how lucky I was in Australia and after my recent visit to London, even the English weather didn't seem so bad compared to the SF fog and winds!!
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Old Jun 7th 2012, 8:39 pm
  #45  
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Default Re: Curse of the Expat

Originally Posted by sallysimmons View Post
Yes, I've found this too. Although some people (usually strangers) start by asking 'why did you come back?' as soon as I say it's because I missed England, they seem really pleased. I wonder if most Brits secretly want to feel proud of their country but get conditioned by the negativity. I don't know if that's right, but I have been quite touched by the genuinely happy reactions people have when they realize you came home because you think Britain is better than wherever you were.
I think you are so bang on with this, every day I get the same comment as soon as I open my mouth, thats not a Yorkshire accent! and I say no its Canadian with a bit of N.ireland thrown in. Then they say why did you come here and I say because it is beautiful. Then they just stare at me and go very quiet and then finally they say yes it is! and smile.
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