JoRobertson

Hi Moobaloo,

our research was our statement, we pieced it all together in a 60 page folder comprising of:

Introduction
Personal Statement
Contact offerings/arrangements
Living and Housing
Schooling/Education
Employment/Finances
Conclusion
Time Line
apendix of reference points (maps, printed emails, school info, real estate info etc)
followed by a full curriculum and statement from the proposed school we plan to take my son to.

it did take a long time and we shaved it right down and kept alot of stuff back, as long as we felt we had made the point on the matter we'd move on, after we'd put it together we showed it to the legal team, in this way you can do all your reseach, put together what you think is good enough and let them tweek it from a legal stance. Remember that all research is good research its never a wasted effort and its all about the kids and you'll get there eventually. we are now penciled in for a final hearing on Dec 8th, and IF it gets that far (which we expect it will) the judges make a decision that day. If you ever get yourself down about the whole thing just google LTR and read the success rates and guidelines that are set out........

remember this......In the eyes of the brithish justice system your ex has to be able to prove 'beyond a reasonable doubt' that this is not in the best interests of the chid/ren........

Keep plugging away a bit at a time and take solace in the thought that there are people here you can chat to who are seemingly in exactly the same position.

We hope to be a success story but refuse to let ourselves get carried away with it......its not final till its signed, sealed and delivered. Then (fingers x'd) we can move on and start planning our new life.

darrenandkelly

Hiya I believe it's the 2 day trial and that's it. But sure there will follow an appeal if we win. Hoping December, told first avail after end nov so just assuming. So scary!!!!

darrenandkelly

What a wonderful statement! Up with baby and a little stressed myself so can't settle back down. All I can hear is ex saying I will sell my flat and do whatever I can to ruin your life for the crime of leaving him 5 years ago and then marrying and having more children! He states he will tear me to shreds on stand as plan to represent himself. I know deep breaths and all but u sometimes get to a point where u r so emotional it is sooo hard.
Anyway please keep me informed as def love to hear how yr getting on with all. Going to be hard not to say to cafcass about certain things but his attitude never is focused on daughter and he'd rather spend time taking her to pub and texting me when got her. Even had us followed by private Investigator and told me going to make biggest f-in tug of war at school and biggest scene anyone had ever seen as he got dates wrong and blamed me. Grrrrrrrrrrrr so sorry, see I don't want to come across wrong way but where do I get the right balance here? Thanks for all advice. From us too far from home and cannot yet see end!

Moobaloo

darren and kelly do you plan to represent yourself? I was thinking about doing the same. Have you had to reply directly to your exs solicitors with letters etc and in court will you have to stand in a stand and be cross examined? I don't know if i will be any good at that my words get jumbled at the best of times. I am however reluctant to pay for a solicitor to reply to letters for me when i will most likely write the letter for the solicitor to type up and post.

Your ex sounds like a complete nightmare! I really hope he's just bluffing and will not cause as many problems as he says. If you win and he does appeal does that stop you forwarding the court papers for your visa, are you expected to wait until the appeal is over? How long is that likely to take? I have no doubt that my ex will appeal too.
Have you seen the caffcass yet? I am dreading that part as i don't know how i am going to not say about a few things. It's going to be hard in questioning to answer why there is absoloutly no communication with ex and why he refuses to say a word to me when picking the children up even when i directly tell him something important about the children such as they had paracetamol at this n that time etc!! He seriously hates me that much! And we broke up 10 years ago because his depression led to a series of domestic abuse incidents.

He took me to court 7 years ago for residencey which his complete statement just said i was everything from a druggy to a mental case and i did horrific things to the kids- all which had to be investigated by social services! I am expecting similar this time around. Caffcass that time just blindly believed the ex and wrote a report which was horrible and i had to challenge it in court saying that all these allogations were unfounded and social services agreed- only thing that kept the kids with me was the fact he changed his mind!!!!! Makes me think he only started the whole residencey case as a control thing. He ended up getting a contact order stating the same contact as i was already giving him :/?!

Thats great info JoRobertson, I have got together some notes under these headings and hope to start gathering info asap! I suppose i have to choose surburb and schools etc, i have no idea where to begin, How do you choose? If it wasn't for this LTR we would see where we managed to get the best rental property and go from there. Is there any school websites that you have used to see which schools are best in brisbane? I'm thinking that would be the best starting point.

Thanks for all your info and support x

darrenandkelly

Hiya
No we have a solicitor but ex is representing self.
How awful for u, you've already had rough ordeal u poor thing! Makes me wonder when these male bunny boilers finally or if ever cease causing so much shite. Surely it's exhausting being that bitter and resentful permanently?! Like they sit there pondering thought of new ways to cause
problems
and have lost sight of what matters!
Take care keep in touch K&D xxx

I know Melbourne have schools listed and ratings etc on myschoolwebsite.au give that a go and see if can find what you're after!

Take

darrenandkelly

Sorry no still awaiting cafcass call to meet with them at any time. Yes have a 2 day trial where be in court and cross examined by ex but judge shouldn't let it get out of hand. It is very very daunting!

If your ex has solicitor have they responded to anything? Have you had initial directions hearing or anything? I do not have to obtain aus visas, we are Australian citizens hence it making it worse because I grew up out there went to school there and college and want to go home!

JoRobertson

BLOODY HELL.........

Kelly your an Aus citizen and just want to go home......that makes the whole thing worse????? surely your ex will be made to see that he cannot stop that from happening???? I hope for your sake, sooner rather than later!!!!!

Moobaloo, we have chosen our place to settle based on the advice we've received from (and to be close to) Jo's brother, who married an aus national almost 10 yrs ago. but the site kelly put a link to should help you find your way.....if all else fails google search (with plenty time set aside) and see where it gets you.

Moobaloo

Thanks for the link kelly it's going to help alot. I can't wait til my youngest starts school next week so i can get the time to get properly stuck in to this project.
It sounds pretty daunting to be cross examined by the ex, tbh i can't see he has a chance of winning your case. he is representing himself, he is obviously full of bitterness and that will undoubtedly come over in the cross examination and maybe show it's all about him and less about the child. Also your reasoning is wanting to go home they got to take that as a major consideration. Must be horrible for you to feel trapped in this country. Australia felt like home to me when i visited a couple of years ago- strange i know but it's the only place i have ever been which feels so normal and confortable and happy it's like we clicked lol I gotta live there!
I haven't seen a solicitor yet so i am at stage 1 in all this, i plan to get at least halfway through my research over the next couple of weeks and get an appointment with a solicitor and start it all. I am also trying to apply for the 175 skilled visa before November, before husband turns 35 and we don't make the points. I am awaiting the ielts results at the mo, they should be here in a few days.
Right, back to my brisbane school googling

darrenandkelly

For all that wish to know....
Well had 2 full days in court..... Cannot express the stress of it! It has been adjourned for judgement so we will receive decision by 11 February if not before! Ex Was so pathetic and threw whopping Strops, spoke to me like shite and was a prat, argued with my barrister, judge and throwing pen down, tutting, pulling faces, acted as though he knew best! So very anxious! Feeling awfully run down now Im unwell with cold, severe bad throat, cough mouth ulcers all due to the come down of adrenalin no doubt! Been a long fight of 5 years and have done all can, we await judge to decide our fate! We apparently have to have a mirror order in place prior to dep if goes our way to satisfy judge? This is going to be tricky by trying to research doesnt look easy or possible.... Advice there be so appreciated! Thanks to all well wishes, couldn't have kept sanity without the support. Our destiny is being decided.....! Pray for outcome to be Australia and I can return home! X

Desparatetoleave

I am no British Expat but rather a European expat living in Britain. I want to move back to my country of origin with my child. Father does not agree. I am in the process of doing all the research but find it so daunting and time-consuming!
I have also changed lawyers a few times. Can you recommend a specialist lawyer for this subject in London? They all cost a fortune and I have already spent thousands. I was told such a case cost at least £20,000 possible up to £80,000.
Is it all about the Finance? I have a very good job here but am very very unhappy and want to go home. Because of the relatively low tax in England my income would not really be higher in my home country. But of course, most places in Europe are cheaper than London? What else does count - it can't all be about Finance. Do you have any tips, please?
I have found some bilingual nuseries and schools and travel should not be very difficult for the father. However, he has very very little money. He pays me a little maintenance for our child, has never paid my mortage when we were together and does not pay the high nursery fees.

I am also afraid that once I make the application hell will break loose and he will make all sorts of applications and accusations to the courts. None of us have residence as lawyers always advised me not to apply for it. I am the primary carer though. He has quite a bit of contact.

Any advise?

Moobaloo

Darrenandkelly- I have just seen your post, it sounds very stressful, how did it go, have they made a decision yet? really hoping its a yes. good luck xx

Moobaloo

Hi Desparatetoleave
i'm sorry about your situation. I do think you stand a good chance if you want to return home, but thats just based on research i have done. I didn't think it cost that much, i was told just 3k but have heard it costing as much as 15k. 80k sounds ridiculous though!
I think in these cases your unhappiness being stuck in a country that isn't your home can hold alot of weight. Sorry i don't know much yet i am yet to start the process. I hope someone better will advise you more.

Desparatetoleave

Can someone help me and tell me if Finance or a well-paid job are really that important?
The reason why I am asking is I am doing very well in the UK. However, London being so expensive you always have to work, work, work and my ex-husband is so poor apart from a pittance of maintenance that I do not even get every week.
The country I want to move to is a high tax country (most Western European countries have higher taxes than the UK) so the net salary is not higher than what I get now.
But the quality of life is much better there and you get more for your money propertywise. But in terms of sheer numbers I would have less...
No offence to any UK people but I never really integrated very much as London is a fast moving place where people move all the time so it is hard to keep friendships.
Who has won their case and can advise and help?

thanks

Catjo

Hi just found this thread... I have just started the process of all this!!! My ex had been a total night mare for 5 years and does everything he can to make my life hell! He only sees my daughter 2 times a week sometimes not even that! He dosnt turn up to school events dosnt take that good of care of her.......
What chance does anyone think I have?????
And how is everyone else's plans and outcomes going?????

Thanks

Cat

laurorum

Hi there,

I have just found this thread... I am involved in a remove from jurisdiction case and i wondered if someone who has been through It can tell me how much It would cost roughly of course... the original budget was £7000 but that is well spent now and doesn't seem to have a limit... any ideas anyone?

Any comments will be welcome...
thanks