Conjugal Issue

Old Oct 9th 2003, 4:13 am
  #1  
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Default Conjugal Issue

I've been reading the posts on this message board, and I must say I am getting very worried. I can understand their point on if you are so committed why arent you married yet, but then why even offer the conjugal partner? or even common-law? why not only offer immigration to those already married?
We are committed to each other, our son is proof of this, in the fact that we want to be a family and raise him together. We are planning to marry, we have already begun the preparations. Problem I have with all of this, is that I have been married previously, and unfortunately it was in a chapel in Reno. That is something I do not want to repeat. I want to have the wedding to be remembered fondly of always. I think that is almost every girl's dream. As most know, planning a wedding takes alot of time, that is why engagements last a year or even two. So saying that you arent committed just because you wont give up your dream wedding for a justice of the peace just to gain entry into a country is horrible. People don't rush weddings(unless they simply want to elope), simply to gain something from it. I would think that if you rush into marriage like they say while you are in the process of immigrating, should be basis for being turned down. As that to me, shows you are just getting married to immigrate instead of out of love. Where as you are taking the time to plan the most important day of your life, should be given greater consideration.
Should it not?

My sponsor and I have been friends for over 5yrs now, we have been conjugal partners for over a year, and we have a 2 1/2 month old son. I visited him every month, he visted me a few times as well. (I worked for an airline, free flights was a benefit)We were already starting to talk about how we could be with each other, ie live together, etc. when I became pregnant. I spent 6 months in Canada during my pregnancy so we could be together for it and the birth. I did not understand at that time about visitor records, for when I asked immigration what i needed to stay, they said since im from the US, i dont need anything to stay up to 6 months. Knowing that I would be submitting an application for immigration, I did not want to stay longer then I was allowed, for I heard that could ruin your chances. And I was also told that everything had to be done outside of Canada. So I left for a month, then I found out that I could request this visitor record and stay while in the processing phase, and just extend the record if needed. Unfortunately for us, now that whole six months we lived together doesnt count for anything.

Given our situation, do you think they will turn us down because we havent married yet?



Mr. Miller,

I want to thank you again for allowing me to talk to you on the phone. I appreciate all the help you have given me. I have taken your advice about my two children from my previous marriage, they are coming to visit me in december and im going to have their medicals done then. I'm still waiting on my FBI Clearance as well, so they should happen about the same time. Also, on October 1st, when I arrived back here in Canada, I requested a visitor record. We told the lady everything, and she didnt give us a hard time at all. In fact, on the visitor record, she gave me a whole year.
I wanted to ask you, given all that is being said, do you think I still have a chance as conjugal, or should we wait to send in after we have lived together for a whole year?
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Old Oct 9th 2003, 4:45 am
  #2  
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Default Re: Conjugal Issue

In someways I agree with you, but I disagree that rushing into a wedding is NOT for love. 2 of my bestfreinds got married on short notice, planned evrything in 2 week/1 month and had wonderful weddings that were stress free. They hadn't spent 1 year planning it and it wasn't expected to go perfectly for that reason. They were both wonderful and that's what we plan to do.

Sara
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Old Oct 9th 2003, 5:07 am
  #3  
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Default Re: Conjugal Issue

I wouldn't be, from what I can see you have co-habited and have a child
together (can't get much more conjugal than that!).
It may be a job convincing CIC the reasons for you not wanting to marry, but
you are definately in a stronger position than we are.


"LadyAri" <member@british_expats.com> wrote in message
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    > I've been reading the posts on this message board, and I must say I am
    > getting very worried.
 
Old Oct 9th 2003, 5:17 am
  #4  
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Sara,
I wasnt trying to say it couldnt be nice, I as well have known people who have married on a whim and it was beautiful, basically my whole point was it should be a choice, not mandatory. im sorry if i offended you in any way, was not my intent at all.
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