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Re: Holiday Romance
Originally Posted by leavinggoa
(Post 11292708)
He worked in a beach shack. All shacks are temporary and are licensed till 31st May. Staff are temporary, and change from season to season.
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Re: Holiday Romance
Originally Posted by Bipat
(Post 11292836)
Off thread, but welcome, are you in India?
My Indian OH -- used stronger words. |
Re: Holiday Romance
Originally Posted by kublacat
(Post 11292882)
Hi Bipat, thanks for the welcome. No I'm not in India at the moment but do spend a lot of time there.
About to leave Mumbai for UK tomorrow. |
Re: Holiday Romance
Originally Posted by beachyhead
(Post 11292877)
What do these "waiters" do out of season, or do they just move to other bars etc. (What is the season for the beach shacks)
I imagine they get what work they can, if any. |
Re: Holiday Romance
dear beachyhead, I have just come across your question and seen all replies. I cant tell you enough to listen to them, and show your sister.!!!
we have been going to goa for about 14 years now. we even bought a house out there to live in the winter and retire to later. but that's another story.. we have witnessed MANY cons where young indian guys latch onto lonely older women, or try their luck with the younger teenage girls. it's a big game for them, and theyre all in it for what they can get. we know of one girl got married to a goan, who locked her indoors and beat her constantly to break her will. all women are subservient to the men. finally her dad came to india to take her home. what will probably happen to your sister is this. she will become besotted with him. she will leave him money when she returns back to uk. she will continue to send money to him. he will be constantly sending silly lovey dovey texts. she will be reluctant to talk about him because he has told her not too. she will be showing small signs of being groomed, ie: changing the way she dresses like ,covering her shoulders, showing less cleavage. she will be taking more expensive gifts out when she visits goa. he will be hinting that he needs about £500 to put in to his bank account so he can apply for a visa to visit her in uk. and so it goes on and on. ITS A SCAM!!! and they are very good at it. I feel sorry for your sister because this guy will be playing her emotions like a roller coaster ride. she will feel that he is the one! that she is the only girl he is interested in. she will be besotted with him, and its up to you to show her the mess she is getting into. by the way, we live near beachyhead. good luck. pm me if you have names etc as I might know of them. if she is visiting south goa for instance she would have bumped into cedric I expect |
Re: Holiday Romance
Originally Posted by steveandpauline
(Post 11292975)
dear beachyhead, I have just come across your question and seen all replies. I cant tell you enough to listen to them, and show your sister.!!!
we have been going to goa for about 14 years now. we even bought a house out there to live in the winter and retire to later. but that's another story.. we have witnessed MANY cons where young indian guys latch onto lonely older women, or try their luck with the younger teenage girls. it's a big game for them, and theyre all in it for what they can get. we know of one girl got married to a goan, who locked her indoors and beat her constantly to break her will. all women are subservient to the men. finally her dad came to india to take her home. what will probably happen to your sister is this. she will become besotted with him. she will leave him money when she returns back to uk. she will continue to send money to him. he will be constantly sending silly lovey dovey texts. she will be reluctant to talk about him because he has told her not too. she will be showing small signs of being groomed, ie: changing the way she dresses like ,covering her shoulders, showing less cleavage. she will be taking more expensive gifts out when she visits goa. he will be hinting that he needs about £500 to put in to his bank account so he can apply for a visa to visit her in uk. and so it goes on and on. ITS A SCAM!!! and they are very good at it. I feel sorry for your sister because this guy will be playing her emotions like a roller coaster ride. she will feel that he is the one! that she is the only girl he is interested in. she will be besotted with him, and its up to you to show her the mess she is getting into. by the way, we live near beachyhead. good luck. pm me if you have names etc as I might know of them. if she is visiting south goa for instance she would have bumped into cedric I expect I wear different clothes in Karwar than in Goa and in cities; so do other Indian people. It's not being "groomed". I think if the SIL in question ever reads this Forum she will have got the message:D but will she listen?? |
Re: Holiday Romance
Originally Posted by Bipat
(Post 11292997)
I think if the SIL in question ever reads this Forum she will have got the message:D but will she listen?? But I'm doing no harm. "will she listen" no because she'll think he's the one and it will be different for her don't know what could convince her really. Thanks again for all your help and comments |
Re: Holiday Romance
I imagine it would give her a Heads Up alert at least, and keep her wits about her. You're doing what you think is right. You have concerns... Nothing wrong with that.
I wasn't aware of this particular Goa problem but these things happen the world over. I see so many ancient (and I mean ancient) guys in certain South East Asian countries hooking up with 20something girls who lure. Of course folks don't seem to bat an eyelid when it's a bloke getting ripped off by a gal. Funny that. |
Re: Holiday Romance
Originally Posted by steveandpauline
(Post 11292975)
dear beachyhead, I have just come across your question and seen all replies. I cant tell you enough to listen to them, and show your sister.!!!
we have been going to goa for about 14 years now. we even bought a house out there to live in the winter and retire to later. but that's another story.. we have witnessed MANY cons where young indian guys latch onto lonely older women, or try their luck with the younger teenage girls. it's a big game for them, and theyre all in it for what they can get. we know of one girl got married to a goan, who locked her indoors and beat her constantly to break her will. all women are subservient to the men. finally her dad came to india to take her home. what will probably happen to your sister is this. she will become besotted with him. she will leave him money when she returns back to uk. she will continue to send money to him. he will be constantly sending silly lovey dovey texts. she will be reluctant to talk about him because he has told her not too. she will be showing small signs of being groomed, ie: changing the way she dresses like ,covering her shoulders, showing less cleavage. she will be taking more expensive gifts out when she visits goa. he will be hinting that he needs about £500 to put in to his bank account so he can apply for a visa to visit her in uk. and so it goes on and on. ITS A SCAM!!! and they are very good at it. I feel sorry for your sister because this guy will be playing her emotions like a roller coaster ride. she will feel that he is the one! that she is the only girl he is interested in. she will be besotted with him, and its up to you to show her the mess she is getting into. by the way, we live near beachyhead. good luck. pm me if you have names etc as I might know of them. if she is visiting south goa for instance she would have bumped into cedric I expect |
Re: Holiday Romance
Originally Posted by Bipat
(Post 11292997)
Agree with everything you have said except the "grooming" part.
We're not talking here about young white girls from troubled backgrounds being plied with alcohol & drugs by men (I'm not getting into the ethnic origin of these men, but I will if anyone cares to?) who then passed them round other men for sex - the most recent cases that come to mind were in Oxford & Rochdale. We are not talking about Saville, Travis, Roache, Hall etc (google whose company Hall & Roache were directors of & see what that person got jailed for over 10 years ago - you will quickly realise what was going on & it is sickening!). We are talking about a lady of certain years who maybe, because of ill treatment (psychological, physical etc) over a period of years by a previous partner, ended up with low self esteem & on a beach holiday in the warm sunshine, after a few drinks received some attention from a younger & to her, handsome chap & the rest is what the O.P. has related above - hopefully the lady in question isn't being 'had over' - sadly, she probably is but will hopefully 'wake up & smell the coffee' before it is too late (either safety wise or financially). Regards H. |
Re: Holiday Romance
Originally Posted by hemingway
(Post 11293588)
We are talking about a lady of certain years who maybe, because of ill treatment (psychological, physical etc) over a period of years by a previous partner, ended up with low self esteem & on a beach holiday in the warm sunshine, after a few drinks received some attention from a younger & to her, handsome chap & the rest is what the O.P. has related above - hopefully the lady in question isn't being 'had over' - sadly, she probably is but will hopefully 'wake up & smell the coffee' before it is too late (either safety wise or financially). Regards H. I can't help feeling that if they are the "one in a thousand" that do end up together, the reality is going to be so much different, everyday life is very different than 2 weeks in the sun. If she is funding his lifestyle by sending money out to him, will he still expect to be "looked after" when he is in this country. Wish i could think of more I could do, to at least try and prove he is genuine. Thanks again for all the comments The majority view certainly seems to be negative |
Re: Holiday Romance
I wouldnt beleive he is 35 either as thats old to be working in a shack.Plus by 30 most goans and Indians are married.I bet he is 25. And nearly all shack lads are from outside Goa,
I wouldnt trust any shack lad.I used to stay in Goa for 6 months at a time and have seen how they operate,its a different girl every time a flight comes in all believing the shack lad they have met is their one true love! It must be the sun,drink and holiday mood why these girls fall for someone they wouldnt look at twice in their own town at home. I doubt you would be able to talk her out of not seeing him again, even if she finds out he is married or going with a local girl i bet she will still stick up for him and still see him. I have seen so many friends of mine do the same thing and it takes them so long to wise up that it will never work. |
Re: Holiday Romance
Originally Posted by imho
(Post 11308568)
I wouldnt beleive he is 35 either as thats old to be working in a shack.Plus by 30 most goans and Indians are married.I bet he is 25. And nearly all shack lads are from outside Goa,
I wouldnt trust any shack lad.I used to stay in Goa for 6 months at a time and have seen how they operate,its a different girl every time a flight comes in all believing the shack lad they have met is their one true love! It must be the sun,drink and holiday mood why these girls fall for someone they wouldnt look at twice in their own town at home. I doubt you would be able to talk her out of not seeing him again, even if she finds out he is married or going with a local girl i bet she will still stick up for him and still see him. I have seen so many friends of mine do the same thing and it takes them so long to wise up that it will never work. I'm sure as you say she probably wouldn't listen and will have to find out herself,although I'm sure he could drag this out for years especially if money is involved. (or are these relationships normally short lived) |
Re: Holiday Romance
Is there anyone still out in Goa who could possibly help out with this (I realise it is now out of season)
Thanks |
Re: Holiday Romance
I echo what many others have said...he's trying to fleece her. That or she's his ticket to living in the UK and all the benefits that comes with it. :thumbdown:
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