Request for Advic Please
#16
Lost in BE Cyberspace
Joined: Apr 2008
Location: Hérault (34)
Posts: 8,888
Re: Request for Advic Please
I can’t help wondering whether you have ever known a mairie (1) to do much regarding complaints of domestic noise or (2) to be proactive in investigating child neglect.
it depends on what the OP wants to achieve, but, if there are serious concerns for the children’s welfare, the mairie is not the correct channel - keeping a lid on things tends to be more of a priority for them, and they are less inclined to listen foreigners than locals.
it depends on what the OP wants to achieve, but, if there are serious concerns for the children’s welfare, the mairie is not the correct channel - keeping a lid on things tends to be more of a priority for them, and they are less inclined to listen foreigners than locals.
As far as I understand, the OP hasn't got proof of child neglect and, by reporting the family "simply" for tapage nocturne, any neglect might be revealed during the investigation.
But before taking steps, best to write a letter or speak calmly to the parents. It may be, since no one complains, that they are unaware of the nuisance caused by their children running around at night, and that they'll stop them from doing so. I wouldn't hold my breath, but it must be the first step before lodging an official complaint, wherever....
#17
Re: Request for Advic Please
Not the same circumstances but I was once very concerned about the well being of a young girl. I talked to a (french) social worker and she advised me to call anonymously the local departement ( in this case Aude) and tell them of my concerns. I heard nothing more from the Aude but they did in fact make a visit to the family and based on what I had said, they took a doctor along.
I learned a fair bit about the reluctance of school teachers and medical professionals to make a referral to social services in France. Once they do it, it's a real administrative headache so they are hesitant. In this particular case, I had been asked to try to figure out what was going on by a brownie leader who had concerns -( the girl was a friend of my daughter),then we spoke to the school who had also good grounds for concern. I got the child referred to 2 drs and they also were sure something was going on. Everyone breathed a sigh of relief when I made the call which as a "non medical professional" ( at that point anyway) I could do anonymously.
So, OP. Call the departement offices and bring in the people that can assess and do something. Then take a step back. You've done what you can.
I learned a fair bit about the reluctance of school teachers and medical professionals to make a referral to social services in France. Once they do it, it's a real administrative headache so they are hesitant. In this particular case, I had been asked to try to figure out what was going on by a brownie leader who had concerns -( the girl was a friend of my daughter),then we spoke to the school who had also good grounds for concern. I got the child referred to 2 drs and they also were sure something was going on. Everyone breathed a sigh of relief when I made the call which as a "non medical professional" ( at that point anyway) I could do anonymously.
So, OP. Call the departement offices and bring in the people that can assess and do something. Then take a step back. You've done what you can.
#18
Lost in BE Cyberspace
Joined: Apr 2008
Location: Hérault (34)
Posts: 8,888
Re: Request for Advic Please
Not the same circumstances but I was once very concerned about the well being of a young girl. I talked to a (french) social worker and she advised me to call anonymously the local departement ( in this case Aude) and tell them of my concerns. I heard nothing more from the Aude but they did in fact make a visit to the family and based on what I had said, they took a doctor along.
I learned a fair bit about the reluctance of school teachers and medical professionals to make a referral to social services in France. Once they do it, it's a real administrative headache so they are hesitant. In this particular case, I had been asked to try to figure out what was going on by a brownie leader who had concerns -( the girl was a friend of my daughter),then we spoke to the school who had also good grounds for concern. I got the child referred to 2 drs and they also were sure something was going on. Everyone breathed a sigh of relief when I made the call which as a "non medical professional" ( at that point anyway) I could do anonymously.
So, OP. Call the departement offices and bring in the people that can assess and do something. Then take a step back. You've done what you can.
I learned a fair bit about the reluctance of school teachers and medical professionals to make a referral to social services in France. Once they do it, it's a real administrative headache so they are hesitant. In this particular case, I had been asked to try to figure out what was going on by a brownie leader who had concerns -( the girl was a friend of my daughter),then we spoke to the school who had also good grounds for concern. I got the child referred to 2 drs and they also were sure something was going on. Everyone breathed a sigh of relief when I made the call which as a "non medical professional" ( at that point anyway) I could do anonymously.
So, OP. Call the departement offices and bring in the people that can assess and do something. Then take a step back. You've done what you can.
#19
Re: Request for Advic Please
Hi, just to clarify, when you say "département offices", would this be the CRIP (Cellule de Recueil des Informations Préoccupantes)? There seems to be one in every département's Conseil Général, and if the OP is sure of her facts (neglect of children), she could contact them via mail from her département's site (Google CRIP and name of département).
It goes without saying that this will probably all need to be done in french unless you are very lucky.
#20
Re: Request for Advic Please
Thank you all very much for this good information and even your experiences.
It seems there is some rotating living arrangement where a couple who live here part of the time who come and go 24 hours a day take turns with the children living there with perhaps one other person staying with them. That child minder seems to vary a lot. So when the couple are there the children are not there. Its chaotic. The children are not crying or being hurt, just the odd tumble. Although sometimes they are so quiet I have worried how that could be possible.
They are rarely bouncing around after 22 hours or before 7 hours in the mornings, which is perfectly normal imo.
We wrote the compulsory letter to them about three years ago before there were children staying there. It was about the very loud night time noises. That was completely ignored and we had to realize becasue of the other experience with the hellish parties downstairs that absolutly nothing would or even could be accomplished about any night noise or parties in this building. Not police, landlords, or the building committee members have stopped the truly outrageous all night parties etc. in the building.
As suggested by you of course we will be leaving eventually. Due to our situation that will be at least a year off from now.
It really has been a learning experience.
We will listen and try to find out for absolutly sure the children are being left alone. I think they are sometimes alone. If that is what goes on, the next time they are left we will take the advice to notify one or some of the suggested appropriates.
As some of you have said, very little is done especially if it is a foreigner making a call or writing a letter.
It seems there is some rotating living arrangement where a couple who live here part of the time who come and go 24 hours a day take turns with the children living there with perhaps one other person staying with them. That child minder seems to vary a lot. So when the couple are there the children are not there. Its chaotic. The children are not crying or being hurt, just the odd tumble. Although sometimes they are so quiet I have worried how that could be possible.
They are rarely bouncing around after 22 hours or before 7 hours in the mornings, which is perfectly normal imo.
We wrote the compulsory letter to them about three years ago before there were children staying there. It was about the very loud night time noises. That was completely ignored and we had to realize becasue of the other experience with the hellish parties downstairs that absolutly nothing would or even could be accomplished about any night noise or parties in this building. Not police, landlords, or the building committee members have stopped the truly outrageous all night parties etc. in the building.
As suggested by you of course we will be leaving eventually. Due to our situation that will be at least a year off from now.
It really has been a learning experience.
We will listen and try to find out for absolutly sure the children are being left alone. I think they are sometimes alone. If that is what goes on, the next time they are left we will take the advice to notify one or some of the suggested appropriates.
As some of you have said, very little is done especially if it is a foreigner making a call or writing a letter.
#21
Lost in BE Cyberspace
Joined: Apr 2008
Location: Hérault (34)
Posts: 8,888
Re: Request for Advic Please
I wouldn't email because then they have your contact details and you may get dragged into the situation rather more than the OP wants. It's the conseil general departemental of wherever the OP lives. Just call the main telephone number and tell them that you want to talk to someone about a child that you believe is in danger. Then when you get that person tell them that you wish to remain anonymous. Have specific details of what your concerns are - dates times, number of children.
It goes without saying that this will probably all need to be done in french unless you are very lucky.
It goes without saying that this will probably all need to be done in french unless you are very lucky.
I wish the OPs all the best during their wait to move away from all their neighbours-from-hell....
#23
Re: Request for Advic Please
In effect what one is doing when calling anonymously is alerting the authorities that something needs to be looked at. It is their job to take it from there - their job to figure out if the tip off sounds genuinie, their job to assess the child's environment and decide if some action needs to be taken. Their necks on the line if they get it wrong.
#24
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Joined: Apr 2008
Location: Hérault (34)
Posts: 8,888
Re: Request for Advic Please
You've got to be kidding! If that was how "anonymous" tip offs worked then nobody would ever call them.
In effect what one is doing when calling anonymously is alerting the authorities that something needs to be looked at. It is their job to take it from there - their job to figure out if the tip off sounds genuinie, their job to assess the child's environment and decide if some action needs to be taken. Their necks on the line if they get it wrong.
In effect what one is doing when calling anonymously is alerting the authorities that something needs to be looked at. It is their job to take it from there - their job to figure out if the tip off sounds genuinie, their job to assess the child's environment and decide if some action needs to be taken. Their necks on the line if they get it wrong.
#25
Forum Regular
Joined: Jun 2021
Posts: 74
Re: Request for Advic Please
I was being the Devil's Advocate, in case of subsequent action for slander. The point being that all contact details are registered and identifiable, however the tip-off is made, but this shouldn't bother bona fide informers, which is what the OP would be if she takes action.
#26
Lost in BE Cyberspace
Joined: Apr 2008
Location: Hérault (34)
Posts: 8,888
Re: Request for Advic Please
No, contact details are not registered if the informant wishes to remain anonymous. I used the Enfance en Danger portal recently. The form makes it clear that leaving contact details is optional. If I had used a “burner” email and a VPN I’d have been untraceable, though I saw no need to do that. If I was untraceable, it would not disqualify my report. The idea is that the best interests of the child come first.
All this is theoretical, since the OP isn't malicious and is obviously concerned by the children's welfare...
#27
Forum Regular
Joined: Jun 2021
Posts: 74
Re: Request for Advic Please
Fair enough, my bad, but are you sure that all traces are eliminated? If an innocent has been accused and their reputation is at stake, how can they identify the malicious informer and sue them for slander?
All this is theoretical, since the OP isn't malicious and is obviously concerned by the children's welfare...
All this is theoretical, since the OP isn't malicious and is obviously concerned by the children's welfare...