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Homesick after a few weeks

Homesick after a few weeks

Old Sep 7th 2011, 2:04 pm
  #16  
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Default Re: Homesick after a few weeks

It is a bit of a relief to see someone that feels the same as I do having moved to Romania 2 and a bit weeks ago. That's probably no comfort to you, but we have found that despite the 'oh everything will be so much cheaper' research it has cost a lot more than we thought in setting up and stocking up and the 'one offs' are more frequent than hoped. We have a baby too and it's tough to adjust.

I'm hoping it will get better, or we'll think seriously about going back to England - but I guess 2 weeks is too soon to tell. If nothing else the experience serves to make us appreciate what we left and the importance of our relationships back home - and Cadburys, driving on the left, Tesco, being able to understand everyone... Hope it gets better for you and if not well done for the guts to try.
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Old Sep 7th 2011, 2:36 pm
  #17  
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Default Re: Homesick after a few weeks

Wow - Romania. Is that with work or family-related? And for a fixed time or permanent?

We've been over in Brussels for 6 weeks now and I'm glad I didn't go back to the UK after only a couple of weeks as that would have been a very expensive 2 week holiday. I'm not sure my company will pay for us to move back if I quit now, so it's going to cost a fortune getting back to the UK. Whilst we're a bit more settled over here, I have to say, I'm still missing lots of things in the UK - Sunday opening hours for the shops for one thing as the shops here are shut on a Sunday. We have to cram food shopping and pretty much most things in on a Saturday. Oh to have Tesco online once again! I'm personally taking things one day at a time. Work is busy, which obviously keeps most of the week occupied, but daughter and wife seem quite settled. I think I spend more time worrying about them than anything else, when perhaps I don't really need to! Did I really just say I'm missing Tesco? In the UK I can't stand the store, take me out the UK and I miss the bloody shop! Typical.

Completely agree about the one-off costs - which have been phenomonal. Not expensive individually, but when you add them up, it's probably cost a couple of thousand just to get settled in and pay various admin/red tape procedures. for example, car insurance is at least a grand - when we've been used to paying a couple of hundred quid! I've not even begun to get the car imported. You can research as much as you want, but until you get to a new place, you don't appreciate how much (and how easily) the settling in costs escalate.

We're going to stick it out for a while. As I said, I'm taking things one day at a time, but the 6 weeks have flown by. I cannot see us being here past summer next year - indeed that's always been the limit. After that, I want to be back in the UK as I want the kids educated there. But for now, it's like get to mid-November and see how things are. If they're pants, then we'll consider going back. If we're ok, then we'll reassess in the New Year. For us, the turnaround to go back is about 10 days, so that's a comfort. then it's a case of jump in the car and in a couple of hours we're in Folkestone. no where near home, but in the UK!

I would definitely advise to stick it out. I was almost in tears most days pretty much for the first couple of weeks, but it's no time really and you're just getting used to it. take everything one day at a time. In terms of keeping in touch with people, we're on skype - a lot at the moment. pretty much every day to one or both sets of parents. and once or twice a week with friends. that helps. ironically, I've found that the one hour time difference is so bloody annoying! you're getting ready for bed and everyone else wants to talk.

had we moved to an English-speaking country i think things would have been a lot easier, but outside of the UK, you're looking at places very far away. if everything settles and we're happy, then for sure we'll stay, but at some point we want to go back to the UK. As you say, at least we can say we've tried it, which is a lot further than other people get.

keep in touch and let us know how you get on.
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Old Sep 7th 2011, 2:43 pm
  #18  
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Default Re: Homesick after a few weeks

Hi melonlegs,

Things often cost a lot more when you move to a new culture. different countries have different sources for the cheap stuff. Back in the UK you can pop into your local Tesco/Asda and be sure to get anything you need at a low price. In Romania, supermarkets are not quite the same: they are branded more for the emerging middle classes and packaged pre-prepared stuff is generally priced higher than in the UK. Cheapo stuff is got from local markets or even the wholesale places like the new Chinese market in Voluntari.

Also the things you buy cheaply in the UK might be more expensive in another country due to lower demand and being imported in smaller quantities. When I lived in Turkey I almost never bought pork - it was an expensive but low quality product only available in expat shops (naturally). I ate a lot of lamb, which was great quality and cheap. In Romania I cook more with chicken and pork, the local favourites here.

Not knowing the language is also a problem. When you can't speak Romanian, it's obviously a bit daunting to go to a shop or market where you have to ask for a product and can't depend on the shopkeeper or stallholder knowing English. It's easier to go to the supermarket where you can just pick stuff off the shelves, but then you end up paying for that ease of purchase here.

Some people eventually learn to adapt and change their habits to suit their new environment, other people manage by living the same way as in their home country but just paying more for that lifestyle, others can't afford to pay more and find it difficult to adapt. If you end up being one of the latter, don't worry, the important thing is that you've given it a try and, as you say, when you go back to Blighty you'll just appreciate it more!
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Old Sep 7th 2011, 3:01 pm
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Default Re: Homesick after a few weeks

welcome to Romania Melonlegs !!!
at last another female brit abroad ))
we also found it very expensive -even after previsits ( see my previous posts) and a bit tough at the begining .. if i am honest we have been here 11months now and finally feel like we are settling in and are actually PLEASED to have our contract extended by 6 months ..
at least you have the nice weather to help you settle in before the snow/cold.
let me know which sector you are .. sorry i`m not a mum but we have a 9wk puppy if that counts ?
susie
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Old Sep 7th 2011, 3:08 pm
  #20  
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Default Re: Homesick after a few weeks

at least you have the nice weather to help you settle in before the snow/cold.
And you've caught the start of the pumpkin season. Pumkin pie! (drool)

Get out of town this autumn and see Transylvania when the trees start to change colours, it's fabulous and it does your soul good to get out of Bucharest as often as possible!
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Old Sep 7th 2011, 5:52 pm
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Default Re: Homesick after a few weeks

one off costs are a problem, but dual edged sword..
one side says bring the absolute minimum with you it keeps the cost of moving down
the other side says take everything with me, I wont be buying it all over again.

when you have to buy the basics like cutlery, iron, kettle, toaster, etc etc
it is hard unless you have prior knowledge of where to go to get them at similar prices to what you expect from Tesco et al

in our case the oh moved with onlly 2 cases and started from scratch cos I was needing them all back in the uk. thats when we found the prices for such basic equipment was sky high in the so called discounters. As time has gone we have found one or two places which would have been cheaper. but then prices are also coming down for such items anyway.

we now have 2 microwaves, 3 irons (already had 2), 2 toasters, 2 ironing boards etc etc etc
but what is going to happen when I have finished packing and move out to be with her ??

one good thing is all EU is 220v so no special equipment as in the US which is 110v.

It will get better, keep saying it, suddenly one morning you will ask yourself "why the flip am I saying that ?"

good luck
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Old Sep 7th 2011, 6:00 pm
  #22  
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Default Re: Homesick after a few weeks

We're here for my partner's work - he's a teacher at an international school - for a 2 yr contract though we could leave before if necessary. I'm glad to hear you've settled in a bit more now though, gives me some hope (even though it's not the same country!) and this forum has helped loads even for the few hours I've been a member. Have to agree, Tesco online has never seemed such a wonderful thing before!

Can I ask is your wife working out there too or at home? The thing I am finding tough at the moment is making sure my daughter gets the opportunity to meet other children (though I don't know your daughter's age, mine is not walking yet so has to be in close proximity most of the time at parks etc). I know my partner worries about us and sometimes I have to reassure him we all made the decision together!

Anyway, thanks for listening and I'd be interested to know if you decide to stick it out. I think we are going to seriously re-evaluate around november too to see if things have gotten easier but it sounds like the first few weeks are the toughest to adapt to Good luck with it all!
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Old Sep 7th 2011, 6:20 pm
  #23  
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Default Re: Homesick after a few weeks

I wish we had a little one .. as all my neighbours seem to be breeding!! .. I meet them when i am out on our walks with the puppy .. they all smile and wave and we use the international language of `mime` - my husband always laughs at me when i come home with stories from the mummies when we dont even speak each others language - (ive now mastered `good morning` but its a mouthfull ) they have all been very welcoming to us.
get out and about as much as you can before the snow comes.
have you got SKY? that keeps you intouch with home along with the social network sites and skype ....if i can talk to someone back home i dont feel so bad....to be honest so many people are jelous we are now classed as `expats` and living abroad .. very hot summer and organised winter snow unlike the uk when everything grinds to a halt.
hang in there.
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Old Sep 12th 2011, 8:35 pm
  #24  
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Default Re: Homesick after a few weeks

@Melonlegs - I've sent you a direct message via the forum. Hope it helps.
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Old Oct 1st 2011, 4:42 pm
  #25  
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Default Re: Homesick after a few weeks

Originally Posted by ExpatBix View Post
I have become incredibly homesick.
Take it this way. Now you are homesick. When you return home after some years, you will be sick of being back home, and you will want to go back to where you are now. That is normal.
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