az2014

2Wings just wanted to say this family is very lucky to have someone as understanding as you in their life. I hope they know this, and that it all works out for you somehow.

2Wings

Awwwwh thank-you so much az2024 that is so kind of you to say. xxx I’m truly hoping for a miracle at this point. I’m not pragmatic, so I deal with all this very emotionally because those two are my heart, and without them there is no me. And if even for a moment I helped a little boy have a mum? Then my work here is complete. xxx

BritInParis

Can I ask which part of the country your husband lives in and what he does/has done for a living?

angie_329

HI 2wings, Glad you are back.. I was wondering how you were,

I felt that there were deeper issues with your husband's state of mind.
His setting up strong structures/routines in life is often a way of coping and feeling in control. However as you say it's very hard to get someone to therapy. Getting his mother in law to therapy would be even harder! Though Cruise.org.uk is the place for this as they offer bereavement counselling. Probably if you got some therapeutic support, that can have the by product of instigating change in those close to you.

Re the settlement family and spouse visa. (there are terms used together as the official heading for spouse/ fiancee/ marriage or similar visas is 'settlement family').

On a practical level, do consult a good firm of solicitors/ or Chambers, as to whether your situation is enough to be able to get a visa outside the rules.

The Garden Chambers are well known with substantial cases behind them- including the challenge to the minimum income rules recently- re the freemovement ( org uk) link I gave you (he is one of the direct access barristers I think, usually you have to have a solicitor and a barrister in court) ... they offer a half hour video link so you can go over your situation. To save time and money I would write out your situation concisely so it can be read quickly before the conversation.
Also to ask about the estimated costs which will be considerable. Many cases that are taken up are from people that qualify for legal aid... so they don't have the problem of paying.

The article below from garden chanbers goes over in more details the minimum income issues. There need to be test cases to challenge the home office's interpretation of the rules which they amended after the UK supreme court ruling, and I do not know if any have been heard yet.

https://www.gardencourtchambers.co.u...gration-rules/

2Wings

Brit in Paris, he is in London. Previous position (when wife was alive) was some type of admin role with The Ministry Of Defence. He doesn’t really discuss it, as much if it is confidential. Currently he is working part time as a security guard.

Angie_329 wow! Thank you for that link. I will follow up for sure as soon as I have a day off work!

Thank-you for the clarification on how the two visas are related. ( spouse vs. family settlement)