Re: 6 Months Today and going back
 

Oooooh here we go again!

Re: 6 Months Today and going back
 

yeah i thought i saw this thread before...
yes we did move back after 7 weeks, and it wasnt because the kids didnt like it, they loved it - but the boss at hubbys firm lied to him ( and on all the forms) and we couldnt live on what they left him with, so we had no choice. that said when we got back my kids and both of us were in deep depression for almost a whole month, didnt want to eat, go out, see all the friends we'd only just said goodbye to. i got kids back into their schools and it was ok but they didnt really want to be there. it started to get better when we found a lace to rent but within a month hubby had another job offer in canada and we had to make the choice for him to leave us and go try it out make it work, or stay here in the same job he was in before taking all manner of BS on a daily basis.
he went 102 days ago and we join him friday and i cant wait. we all loved canada, yes it takes time to get settled and make friends, which we didnt have, and i cant say if we had been there 6 months we may have felt differently. but its a very very costly thing to do (shipping alone makes your eyes water) the stress on the family is immense and you might find this hole is no better than the life you dreamed of but havent yet found over there.

best of luck and since this has been resurrected, anyone know any updates?

Re: 6 Months Today and going back
 

Erm, actually, I think helcat is right.

And I can speak from direct experience because, 25 years ago, at the age of 17, I moved from the US to the UK. I hated it and was homesick the whole time. For the first 12 months, there wasn't a single day that I didn't want to move back. But, my parents made me stick it out ("just give it 18 months, then we'll talk") and I am forever grateful that they did. It was heartbreaking for them, but I'm so happy that they didn't allow a teenager make that kind of life altering decision.

It takes much longer than 6 months to settle in and they should give it at least 18 months. We, of course, want our children to be happy, but children aren't always best placed to make those kinds of decisions.

Re: 6 Months Today and going back
 

Thanks!:thumbsup:

Re: 6 Months Today and going back
 

My parents moved me here when I was 16 years old and I have never been the same since. I am looking to move back to the UK after 30 odd years and 4kids and a couple of failed marriages. It has never been home for me.

Re: 6 Months Today and going back
 

Welcome to British Expats! Have you been back to the UK at all in the last while? Do you still have family there?

Re: 6 Months Today and going back
 

That is a shame and unlike most of us, it wasn't your choice to move, but I hope you have researched the move back thoroughly.

I have only been here a year and yet Expats who have been back recently tell me that it has changed a lot even in that short time.
Or maybe it is us that have changed.
Either way, even if things haven't gone well for you here in Canada please don't assume that it is all due to being here and that going back will be the solution.
Make sure that there really is something better for you in the UK.

"Home" isn't really a geographical location IMHO but more about feeling comfortable and accepted and happy somewhere.
30 years is a very long time to be away.
After so long away from the UK, will you feel "at home" there?

Look on the bit of this Forum which is all for and by people who are returning to the UK for lots of advice and news about current moves being planned/made.

I really hope that if you do move back it will be everything you hoped for.:fingerscrossed:

Re: 6 Months Today and going back
 

I second that! I returned to the UK when I was 22 after leaving at the age of 9. There was lots of good but it wasn't the way I dreamt it.
Be prepared for a culture shock and the feeling that you might not actually belong anywhere.
I do wish you good luck though. Hope you find what you are looking for. :)

Re: 6 Months Today and going back
 

I've lived overseas as an Ex-pat for a good chunk of my life. I sometimes meet people that say they want to go back 'Home'. I warn the ones that have not been back for a few years that things may not be as they remember them. Initially they may feel relieved to return until they see that things have changed in the UK also. I'd suggest anyone thinking of moving back, maybe after a long time away, visits the UK on an extended holiday first (if they can afford it) to try and get a feel for the place again, rather than head back and expect it to be all hunky dory, find out it's not what they remember and want to turn around and head back to Canada again!

We have some family members, with kids, that managed to obtain FSW a few years back. Hubby gave up well paid IT job in the UK for equally well paid job in Canada. They moved from the UK to Canada. The wife decided she didn't like it. They returned to the UK after about 10 months. The recession had hit in the UK and the hubby was out of work for ages. His old job was not available to him any more. They were back in the UK alright… broke and miserable. He wanted to go back to Canada. She didn't. It nearly killed the marriage. They are still suffering to this day. I'm not passing opinion on their circumstances, but just showing potential pitfalls of switching contries like that.

Re: 6 Months Today and going back
 

All very good comment.
I also think when someone has some bad experiences in one place, such as redundancy, financial difficulties or family breakdown (the poster mentioned failed marriages) those experiences become associated with being in that place.
However, those bad things could have happened anywhere and are not restricted to being in any particular location.

Liverbirds711 was also only a young teenager (16) when arriving in Canada, so none of the life lived in the UK was even as an adult - not old enough to have had a proper job, to have lived in their own home, paid bills or to have had marriages or children.
I wonder what the thoughts about going back "home" are based on?

Re: 6 Months Today and going back
 

Probably the same "wishy-washy" ideas about everything being better, that a lot of Brits have when coming to Canada. Since so many people on here are fond of telling people to "give it a go" when asked whether it is a good idea to come to Canada, surely it is equally valid for Liverbirds711 to give the UK "a go"?

Re: 6 Months Today and going back
 

"Equally valid", perhaps; equally foolish, probably.

"Giving it a go" is fine if you have the financial deep pockets, a sufficiently relaxed attitude to life to not mind if it doesn't work and a Plan B.

I haven't managed my emigration along those lines as I haven't the money to waste or the stomach for disappointment and at 43, I haven't got youth on my side so no time for a Plan B, really :p.

Re: 6 Months Today and going back
 

My turn to pat you on the back now... a lot of sense written there also.. young lady ;)

I think some people may try to compare the new country with the old. It's an easy trap to fall into when you have only lived in one other country before in your life, but it never works. I always look for the positives and generally the few negatives I come across will eventually take care of themselves. If you get into a negative frame of mind life will never seem to improve. Just look around and think.... Surely 34 Million Canadians can't all be wrong happily living here. ;)