MarylandNed

Where do you currently live? Guelph? Why do you choose to remain in Guelph rather than go back to the UK? Do you like Canada more than you like the UK? Or is there even anything you like about Canada?

Oink

Why do you live in Maryland rather than Canada?

dbd33

Guelph.

Yes, Guelph.

Because I can walk to work in Guelph. It's too far to walk from the UK.

No.

Yes.

Lorry1

Done

MarylandNed

I lived in Canada for 7 years - 2 of my kids were born there. Family circumstances dictated a move back to the UK for a couple of years - had our 3rd kid there. At one point we thought we might actually settle in the UK permanently but we realized that Canada was a much better place to raise the kids. While I was in London planning a move back to Canada and looking for work in the Toronto area, I just happened to hear about a good job opportunity in Maryland. I was interviewed on the phone and offered the job on the spot. My wife is a nurse and can find work anywhere. We moved here almost 14 years ago and the move was the first time we'd set foot in the place! Had our 4th kid here.

We have found our part of Maryland to be a pleasant place to live. We get 4 real seasons. There are mountains on one side and the ocean and beaches on the other. We're within striking distance of some interesting cities and recreational activities. We live in a good school district - maybe the best in the entire country. We have access to great healthcare. Our 4th child has a serious medical condition and Johns Hopkins Hospital in Baltimore is close by and is maybe the best hospital in the country.

We've thought of moving back to Canada several times over the years. My oldest is now at uni there and loves it. The next one is likely going to a different uni in Canada next year. However, the other 2 kids are very happy and settled here in Maryland and it would be very difficult to uproot them at this point without a very good reason. However, if I was miserable here, I certainly wouldn't stay and moan about it constantly. I'd do something about it. Life is too short to think otherwise.

Is living in Canada so much better than living in Maryland that I feel I have to uproot and move again? No. Can I see myself moving to Canada in the future? Yes. Would I ever go back to the UK to live? Probably not but you never know. There are things I like and dislike about all 3 countries. I know at this point that the UK would be my 3rd choice if I was forced to choose. I know I could live quite happily and comfortably in either Canada or the US.

Having said all that, the lack of a social safety net and universal healthcare in the US scares the bejesus out of me. Some of the right wing politics scares me too. Plus there's always this constant worry that you're weeks from being out on the street in the US should things go down the toilet. As I said, nowhere is perfect but all 3 countries have something going for them because immigrants continue to flock to all 3.

MarylandNed

Ok so you're an economic prisoner of Canada? You can't find work in the UK? Have you tried? Or is it simply that you like the UK better than Canada but not enough to make the big leap back?

dbd33

I didn't say I liked the UK better, that's your thought not mine. However, were I outside Canada I would not be able to sustain my alimony payments so, yes, in a manner of speaking, I'm a prisoner.

christmasoompa

What if the other option is returning to the UK leaving their Canadian spouse, adult children and grandchildren behind? Many people who dislike Canada and want to return to the UK are in that situation.

And of course there are other reasons such as just the cost - they may not have the £20k or so it'll cost to return sitting in a bank account and just can't afford to move.

You only have to read the Moving Back to the UK forum to see reasons like this given every day, by people who are miserable and utterly torn by their circumstances.

Atlantic Xpat

One could always "do a runner" couldn't one?

Editha

So, you only lived in Canada for 7 years, and haven't lived there for 16 years. You haven't lived in the UK for 14 years. I suggest that you are not really qualified to talk about what it is like to live in either Canada or the UK now.

Yet, on this thread you have made comments about the UK such as

In the absence of any recent experience of the UK, you have wasted space on this thread giving otiose information about relative population density, and links to a right-wing newspaper article.

In other words, you have shown yourself completely incapable of objectivity, or balanced judgement, exactly what you accuse regular contributors to this forum of.

Your lack of insight is remarkable.

dbd33

Yes. "Prisoner of Conscience" then.

MarylandNed

It was actually a question. But fair enough, I now understand your situation a bit better.

Almost Canadian

But spousal support payments are based on ability to pay and need of the receipient spouse. A move to the UK for lower wages (an inference that I have drawn which may be incorrect) would be a change of circumstances and would a) require your ex to prove a continuing need and b) if such need was proven, would require a fresh calculation in light of your new income.

If it has been some time since the original Order was made I suspect it would be difficult for her to be able to show a continuing need, based upon the circumstances of the divorce unless, of course, they is some physical/mental impairment that she has that has prevented her from working.

MarylandNed

Actually you're making some pretty big assumptions there that are not correct. I have visited Canada and the UK quite often over the past few years. I had an extended visit to the UK in the summer of 2009 - long enough to feel like I lived there again. I have been in Canada on average once a month this year. My company has an office in Toronto and I have to visit there frequently. I just got back from a 4 day visit to Ontario this past weekend where I was visiting my daughter.

I have friends and family who live in various parts of the UK. I listen to what they tell me. I read the newspapers and I watch the news. I spent an entended period of time with my brother who lives in North West London (the same part of London I lived in for 2 years). It really has gone down the toilet and I saw that with my own eyes. So don't talk nonsense about me not having had recent experience of Canada or the UK because you're wrong.

So you dispute the population density information? Unfortunately for you, you won't be able to actually produce anything that disputes it and will easily be able to find figures that support it. Not just in newspapers either.

Fact - the UK has a much higher population density that Canada or the US. Fact - England is the most densely populated part of the UK.

I look forward to you proving these facts wrong.

Editha

You clearly don't understand the meaning of the word otiose. What kind of company do you work for?