Are we?
 

Are we making the biggest mistake of our lives?


lately been getting second thoughts about our move to canada.

concerns have been

the eldest boy (15) not wanting to go,

job prospects

the finality of it all

negative vibes recently from the threads i've been reading.

Am I making the worst/best decision in my life which will affect my family?

I'm sure those of you who have made the move have also come to this low point.,but how do you get over this?

Is Canada still the best place to move to for my children?

Some reassurance please.

Re: Are we?
 

I don't think anyone is in a position to advise you what to do because the decision can only be yours and everyone else is likely to be biased either because of good experiences or bad.

We are heading off in the next couple of months and as we get closer uncertainty creeps into my mind because it is such a big move and I think thats perfectly normal to feel that way. I also happen to think that the UK is a decent place to live and it is not the reason for going. We have other reasons for making the move and those are still very relevant and answer my doubts everytime.

I think that these forums are very valuable and useful but can also create doubts because they will attract those who have not enjoyed there time in Canada and are looking to share their experiences. But many do make a successful move and there's no reason why others won't continue to do so either.

Re: Are we?
 

I felt just like you this time last year. How would I feel without all my friends and family there with me, how will the kids settle, what if it doesnt work out, was it right to be taking the kids away from their blood father? I've been here now almost 6 months and although still in the "honeymoon period" compared to a lot of people on this forum, there hasn't been a day where I regret it. I can understand your son not wanting to go especially at the age where they have just made all these friends at high school and then he is thinking he will loose them. My two are a lot younger but I like to think that the experiences they will have at such a tender age will benefit them so much more than if they were in the UK. They are still in touch with a lot of people from back home and its amazing to see them "talking" online now compared to my childhood friends that I don't even know where a lot of them are now!!

If you do decide not to go through with it, I can guarantee that within a year you will be thinking what could have been. It's only natural you feel apprehensive as it's part of human nature. The way I look at it now is that if it doesn't work out then you learn and go back to the UK. I will always be a british citizen and there's no reason that I can't go back at any time. The same for you too. Also don't listen to the bad stories too much. I found it was like having a child...you only get to hear the horror stories!!!!lol

Good Luck

Thanks for your advice stepnec and Ukjo.

I try not to be under any disillusion regarding the move, and you're right in that it's ultimately my decision whether or not I go ahead with the move.

The hardest thing is realising that the life we now know will drastically alter, but hopefully it will be for the better.

We are also burning our bridges somewhat as we will be unable to keep our property in the UK, and if the worse does happen, it will essentially mean starting over, but in a much reduced standard of living for a long period of time in the UK.

I am probably being foolish regarding this whole issue, as I can see some people thinking that if I feel like this, maybe I shouldn't be going, but I have strong reasons why I want to go.



:confused: :(

What makes or breaks a move to Canada is finding decent employment. Complaints about Canada invariably begin with job problems.

I am also in the same boat and the doubt is kicking in. Will I ever find a decent Job? How long will it take? What if I don’t like it?

I guess you are like me; I start reading all the stories about people finding it difficult or not liking Canada and then get worried. Then on the other hand you get a wonderful story and you’re high again.

I sometimes think that that it’s good to know about the difficulties as this will at least prepare you for some degree of knock back in you path to bettering your standards. Also you need to consider this. All people have difficulties at some point no matter where you are. Even now living in the UK people may face redundancy or find it difficult getting Jobs. Kids are not happy with Schools etc etc. I bet your Child would be the same if you decided to move 20 miles away and put him in another school.

I guess what I’m saying is that it’s good to know about the negatives as well as the positives as this will better prepare you. No matter where you decide to live there are always Pros and Cons.

Sukhi do you have any Family in Canada?
Where about are you looking to move too?

Thanks
Bob


:)

Hi Bob, thanks, its good to know that I'm not the only one in this position. I am very lucky in that I have some relatives in the Toronto area, and I have been more then fortunate in meeting with Ray1968 who has provided me with very good advice and I had the pleasure of meeting with him and his lovely wife when I visited there earlier this year.

I was considering the following areas:, Brampton, Oakville and slightly off the beaten track, Guelph. Where are you heading?

Calgary you are so right, unfortunately whilst beauty feeds the soul, it doesn't put food in your stomach! I will probably do one of two things.

Either buy a small retail business., or set up my own small scale construction company. I have construction design skills, and I have my own company in the UK specialising in loft conversions, new build, and small extensions. If the need arising, I am not afaird to pick up my tools and do general maintenance work as I am capable of carrying out most small scale construction projects on my own. Hopefully this will be enough to get me started, BUT (taking a deep breath!:D ) Its tough starting out from scratch.

I have got to the point in my life where I cannot work for a company with all its restrictions, and hopefully, with little or no mortgage to speak off, I will need to concentrate on just earning at least the minimum to cover my living expenses and save enough to put the kids through University. (One has to think of these things!)Lol!

I dont really see any finality to the move, its not like they burn all the planes here once they land, so if Canada is not for you then you can always return to the UK! OK, you will lose some money, but happiness is more important than money anyway.

I agree that many recent posts here have been very negative. I love it out here, but even I have been depressed by some of the recent post. You have to remember that most of the contented expats do not visit a site like this to report back on the positives.

Look at it this way, having come so far in the process, if you decide not to come, will you look back in twenty years and think "What If"

Good luck, as Calgary says, everything is very dependent on having a decent income.

Iain

Negatives have seemed to be in the ascendancy for the past few weeks, but then, you have a great chat with someone like UKJO or Corky and it's all back up again.

Doubt is natural, but as was said above......What if??

I've been through that when we had the chance to move to Spain ten years ago, and I don't want it again.

Re: Are we?
 

Negatives have seemed to be in the ascendancy for the past few weeks,
but then, you have a great chat with someone like UKJO or Corky and it's
all back up again.

Doubt is natural, but as was said above......What
if??

I've been through that when we had the chance to move to Spain ten
years ago, and I don't want it again.


--
Posted via http://britishexpats.com

As a contented PR, why am I looking at an expat website?

Good question ....

We've been in Calgary almost three years and the first year certainly wasn't fun. I got laid off after a year of a crappy job that it took me 3 months to get in the first place. I was at the point of getting flight times to get back to the UK when I got offered a much better job. The new job is way better and I'm feeling much more settled. So yes, its all about employment.

So why am I looking at an expat website?

We look at websites like this to be reminded how awful life in the UK was and how desperate people are to get away from it.

Why am I still in Calgary?

My kids love Canada and won't even go back to the UK to visit, just in case we decide to stay! If my wife and kids hadn't been so keen to stay in Calgary, I wouldn't still be here. My children are young - the oldest started school part way through his kindergarten year when he got here. Even he found the changes difficult to deal with in the begining.

The most rotten thing about my first year's experience, is I get the feeling that the people at the company I first worked for expected me to clear off back to the UK, I think they're more than a little PO'd to find that I'm still here.

I had eight years experience of running a business in the UK and it didn't make much difference to the business I set up here last year. Just like getting a job, its all about contacts.

It's hard to get a job when you're a new, unknown immigrant - running a business has exactly the same challenges.

I'll save time and say it myself - everybody is different and everyone's experiences and how they react to the challenges will be different :o

Only four months until I can apply for citizenship - I've got to say that I'm really looking forward to it.

In our situation, moving to Calgary was the worst decision we ever made. I ditched a superb life and career in London for a mediocre life in Calgary which in my opinion is 10x worse.

Now of course, we're stuck in a rut and living in a horrible apartment building with antisocial neighbours. What's worse, as a 26 year old, Calgary appears extremely dull compared to the vibe you get in London or most other UK cities.

It's fine to have dreams about living in a nice big 4 bedroom Canadian home, but that won't happen if nobody is willing to give you gainful employment - which is what happened to me. I can't help feeling that even if I did live in one of those houses, I wouldn't have time to enjoy it - it's all work work work here with very few weeks off per year.

Of course, if I was sensible enough to keep on my career track in UK, I would have been perfectly capable of buying a nice 4 bedroom house in Surrey or Hampshire. Of course, all my peers back in England now do live well and are happy.

I'd like to close with the common myth that 'everything' is better than Canada - it's not - the same crap happens here, but people like to pretend it doesn't. That's the perspective I share with my wife - and she is a born Calgarian. Of course, at the end of the day, it depends on what you want and what kind of person you are.

No harm in trying, but just have a backup plan - something we didn't.

Hi Simonhouse,

What were the reasons for moving to start with?

Is it with hindsight that you say that you gave up a superb life and career or were you aware of doing that at the time?

Yup, too true.

But it's sunnier here ....

I was escaping the tax system.

If you're running away from personal problems, they just follow you.

Simonhouse probably thought he was - I certainly thought I was - few people ever emigrate with a plan to not be happy.