Tried and failed!
Jun 24th 2010, 5:14 pm
#46
Slightly Canadian
Joined: Jul 2005
Location: St. John's, Newfoundland
Posts: 10,129
Re: Tried and failed!
3 months is a bit of a short time to try things but to my first point, depletion rate of savings might not allow for 6-12 months.
Jun 24th 2010, 6:44 pm
#47
Forum Regular
Joined: May 2007
Location: Saskatoon originaly Stafford, UK
Posts: 86
Re: Tried and failed!
So,
To cut a very long story short.. we moved to Calgary in March this year and embarked upon this life we had been planning for years.
Hubby got a job relatively early, which is good but it doesnt pay good and we are having to subsidise with our little pot of savings...
I have hit a brick wall regarding my work as a nurse.. Just No jobs, and no point in getting registered to work in Alberta as they dont have enough jobs for their own newly qualified nurses..
Anyhow our children are little and I am enjoying spending time with them
but boy am I lonely! I have tried mom and toddler groups and moms at the school, but I feel that Canadian moms keep to themselves.. ' a generalisation I know but true in my case'.
I have always prided myself on being a good communicator and able to make friens easily.. not here!
I know its still early days... but hubby feels the same!
I am not down about Canada as it is a wonderful country and a better place for children..I think..
We cannot survive here being so unhappy.. financially its crippling us!
All in all, we miss family so much and have decided to return to the UK
Im sure lots of you will say..'its early days stick at it' and ' didnt you know this before you moved'.
So......... if anyone is looking for a nice house to rent in Copperfield, Calgary from mid August let me know... oh and a Dodge caravan with low kms to buy...
send me a pm if anyone is interested.
No negative replies please as im pretty fed up already..
Regards Top Cat
To cut a very long story short.. we moved to Calgary in March this year and embarked upon this life we had been planning for years.
Hubby got a job relatively early, which is good but it doesnt pay good and we are having to subsidise with our little pot of savings...
I have hit a brick wall regarding my work as a nurse.. Just No jobs, and no point in getting registered to work in Alberta as they dont have enough jobs for their own newly qualified nurses..
Anyhow our children are little and I am enjoying spending time with them
but boy am I lonely! I have tried mom and toddler groups and moms at the school, but I feel that Canadian moms keep to themselves.. ' a generalisation I know but true in my case'.I have always prided myself on being a good communicator and able to make friens easily.. not here!
I know its still early days... but hubby feels the same!
I am not down about Canada as it is a wonderful country and a better place for children..I think..
We cannot survive here being so unhappy.. financially its crippling us!
All in all, we miss family so much and have decided to return to the UK
Im sure lots of you will say..'its early days stick at it' and ' didnt you know this before you moved'. So......... if anyone is looking for a nice house to rent in Copperfield, Calgary from mid August let me know... oh and a Dodge caravan with low kms to buy...
send me a pm if anyone is interested.
No negative replies please as im pretty fed up already..
Regards Top Cat
Can I give you some advice for what it is worth.
In 2003 my hubby, our then 5 year old daughter and myself emigrated to the USA to New Mexico. We were like you - we were finally living our dream. Anyway long story short we stayed for 18 months and I wanted to move back, unable to work, lonely, etc.
We went back and it was only then (And this is what you need to remember) THAT ALL THE REASONS WHY WE MOVED IN THE FIRST PLACE CAME FLOODING BACK!!! We realised that we did not belong in the UK anymore. People you know back there move on without you andyou have also moved on.
Anway fast forward, in 2008 we emigrated (Did you know that people who emigrate and bounce back to native lands - 85% of these people re-emigrate!) to Saskatchewan, Canada..............and the rest is history. LOve it!!
They say timelines are as follows
1 - 6 Months - Holiday every day feeling period
6 - 12 Months - Realise what you have done
12 - 36 months - Start to feel you want to go back to the UK
If you survive 3 years most people have got over the honeymoon period and stay put.
I know you will have been told "you are leaving too soon" etc and I like you didn't listen, boy do I wished I had and given it a little longer as this moving to and from has cost us a LOT of money
Julie
Jun 24th 2010, 6:45 pm
#48
Forum Regular
Joined: May 2007
Location: Saskatoon originaly Stafford, UK
Posts: 86
Re: Tried and failed!
Hey TC
Can I give you some advice for what it is worth.
In 2003 my hubby, our then 5 year old daughter and myself emigrated to the USA to New Mexico. We were like you - we were finally living our dream. Anyway long story short we stayed for 18 months and I wanted to move back, unable to work, lonely, etc.
We went back and it was only then (And this is what you need to remember) THAT ALL THE REASONS WHY WE MOVED IN THE FIRST PLACE CAME FLOODING BACK!!! We realised that we did not belong in the UK anymore. People you know back there move on without you andyou have also moved on.
Anway fast forward, in 2008 we emigrated (Did you know that people who emigrate and bounce back to native lands - 85% of these people re-emigrate!) to Saskatchewan, Canada..............and the rest is history. LOve it!!
They say timelines are as follows
1 - 6 Months - Holiday every day feeling period
6 - 12 Months - Realise what you have done
12 - 36 months - Start to feel you want to go back to the UK
If you survive 3 years most people have got over the honeymoon period and stay put.
I know you will have been told "you are leaving too soon" etc and I like you didn't listen, boy do I wished I had and given it a little longer as this moving to and from has cost us a LOT of money
Julie
Can I give you some advice for what it is worth.
In 2003 my hubby, our then 5 year old daughter and myself emigrated to the USA to New Mexico. We were like you - we were finally living our dream. Anyway long story short we stayed for 18 months and I wanted to move back, unable to work, lonely, etc.
We went back and it was only then (And this is what you need to remember) THAT ALL THE REASONS WHY WE MOVED IN THE FIRST PLACE CAME FLOODING BACK!!! We realised that we did not belong in the UK anymore. People you know back there move on without you andyou have also moved on.
Anway fast forward, in 2008 we emigrated (Did you know that people who emigrate and bounce back to native lands - 85% of these people re-emigrate!) to Saskatchewan, Canada..............and the rest is history. LOve it!!
They say timelines are as follows
1 - 6 Months - Holiday every day feeling period
6 - 12 Months - Realise what you have done
12 - 36 months - Start to feel you want to go back to the UK
If you survive 3 years most people have got over the honeymoon period and stay put.
I know you will have been told "you are leaving too soon" etc and I like you didn't listen, boy do I wished I had and given it a little longer as this moving to and from has cost us a LOT of money
Julie
Jun 26th 2010, 3:47 am
#49
Forum Regular
Joined: Jan 2009
Posts: 182
Re: Tried and failed!
Why is hubby not earning enough, ? did you not research before you came his earning potential? or are you just spending/renting to high ? And giving in after barely 3 months. I know you didn't want any negative replies and i dont meen to be hurtfull, but it seems to me that you only have yourselves to blame for your plight. I dont consider that you have tried and that you have just given up.
Jun 26th 2010, 3:55 am
#50
Forum Regular
Joined: May 2007
Location: Saskatoon originaly Stafford, UK
Posts: 86
Re: Tried and failed!
Sadly I have to agree with Elizabeth- You have not given it long enough, you are going thru natural feeelings that I am sure nearly everyone would agree they went thru.
Saskatchewan are CRYING out for nurses and the economy here is booming and a lot cheaper to live here in Saskatoon than Calgary......and health care is free straight away.
Think seriously beofre you do anything, if you need to just PM me for someone to talk to.
Julie
Saskatchewan are CRYING out for nurses and the economy here is booming and a lot cheaper to live here in Saskatoon than Calgary......and health care is free straight away.
Think seriously beofre you do anything, if you need to just PM me for someone to talk to.
Julie
Jun 26th 2010, 2:27 pm
#51
Lost in BE Cyberspace
Joined: Jul 2006
Location: Cochrane, Alberta
Posts: 7,861
Re: Tried and failed!
Top Cat - hello - I didn't respond straight away, as I wasn't really sure what I wanted to say!
The most relevant thing I can say, I think, is that we totally empathise with your thought processes! Not at three months, but certainly before the six months were up, there were many issues "not going to plan", specifically on the work front.
It really is bloody hard when you can't find a satisfying job, and financial worries loom large. If work is wonderful and satisfying but even if it is poorly paid, you can inhabit a more positive outlook that things will get better, and "hanging on in there" seems more feasible.
If work is not forthcoming, or is not at all satisfying and is also poorly paid, it's hard to see a way forward. And every penny is resentfully handed over. Been there - eaten baked beans on toast to prove it!
I personally do not see it as a failure - but you will, and you will perceive that other people will think this. Get over that, quickly! It's your life - do what you know is right for you.
10% of me still thinks we should have just quit and buggered off back to the UK within that first year. 90% of me is glad we muddled on, and I really am mostly grateful for all we have here and how things have panned out. It's not perfect, but I don't expect it to be.
I truly wish you all well - job satisfaction is a massive element to life - all I can suggest is don't make decisions in a hasty, panicky mode - definitely take a few metaphorical deep breaths and do the old "head" and "heart" conversation a few times. I suspect you have already done this and "return" is the answer for you.
Good luck.
The most relevant thing I can say, I think, is that we totally empathise with your thought processes! Not at three months, but certainly before the six months were up, there were many issues "not going to plan", specifically on the work front.
It really is bloody hard when you can't find a satisfying job, and financial worries loom large. If work is wonderful and satisfying but even if it is poorly paid, you can inhabit a more positive outlook that things will get better, and "hanging on in there" seems more feasible.
If work is not forthcoming, or is not at all satisfying and is also poorly paid, it's hard to see a way forward. And every penny is resentfully handed over. Been there - eaten baked beans on toast to prove it!
I personally do not see it as a failure - but you will, and you will perceive that other people will think this. Get over that, quickly! It's your life - do what you know is right for you.
10% of me still thinks we should have just quit and buggered off back to the UK within that first year. 90% of me is glad we muddled on, and I really am mostly grateful for all we have here and how things have panned out. It's not perfect, but I don't expect it to be.
I truly wish you all well - job satisfaction is a massive element to life - all I can suggest is don't make decisions in a hasty, panicky mode - definitely take a few metaphorical deep breaths and do the old "head" and "heart" conversation a few times. I suspect you have already done this and "return" is the answer for you.
Good luck.
Jun 26th 2010, 5:00 pm
#52
Forum Regular
Joined: Jan 2009
Posts: 182
Re: Tried and failed!
Thank you for your negative reply.
Firstly research, We spent 3 months in Calgary in 2007 conducting research, a further 3 weeks in Ontario in June last year and a further week in Oct last year researching our move. I think that question is now answered.
I have 14 years Nursing experience, with a degree, and I also have 8 years Policing experience. We fully researched work and sent e mails from the UK but were always faced with the same response, 'we are interested and would consider your application hawever not untill you land in Calgary and in a position to commit'.
Since landing the only work hubby has only been able to secure (with 10 years Police experience) is a $15 per hour Security position.
He was always willing to start at the bottom however after 4 months and no fresh opportunities coming up we are faced with the decision, stay and fund our stay spending a big portion of our savings, which we would need for a deposit on a home in the hope something comes up but with the risk of 12 month down the line being in rented, in the same working position but with no deposit for a home.. OR return back to the UK where we can start back working at the same place we left with good pay.
We came Canada in the hope of being able to secure jobs with an average pay that would pay enough to provide a home with enough left over to allow us enjoy some of the outdoor living. It just so happens that although it works out for many people it just hasn't for us.
If it was just myself and my OH then we would probably last out a little longer however we take being a parent and being able to provide for our family very seriously and with banks both in Canada and the UK now refusing to give morgages to people with less the 10% deposit, if I use up all our money then it could put buying a house back by 5 years or more. Not a position that i want to find myself in.
I know you mentioned research but moving over to Canada this did not happen over night. From the point that we evaluated everything and decided 100% to move it was a further 6 months after that when we landed.... alot happens in 6 months, the Pound lost even more strength against the Dollar and the forcast that work opportunities were about to open didnt and still have'nt happened.
I would never put anyone off coming over here and giving it a go. If i knew 6 months ago what i know now I would still have come over. I have met some great people and enjoyed all the challenges but when you find yourself every month using up more and more of your savings, you eventually are forced into making a decision.
Stay with big risks or go back, (Hubby was earning 3 times what he earns here), buy a house and come out to Canada every other year on holiday.
We love Canada and would prefer to leave Canada still loving the country rather then stay a little longer and risk leaving feeling bitter and dissapointed.
I do understand that we should give it longer.. as 4 months is no trial really.. but if your lonely, under financial pressure and you can see no light at the end the Uk is more promising for us in the current climate.
No doubt when I get back to the Uk and start work, dealing with sex offences and nasty assaults etc.. Seeing the worst of the Uk in all its glory !!I will wish that things worked out here..
I need stability for my family..
Thank you to all who have PM'd me.. as usual you are all a fantastic support and taking the time to read and reply to me.
Top Cat
Firstly research, We spent 3 months in Calgary in 2007 conducting research, a further 3 weeks in Ontario in June last year and a further week in Oct last year researching our move. I think that question is now answered.
I have 14 years Nursing experience, with a degree, and I also have 8 years Policing experience. We fully researched work and sent e mails from the UK but were always faced with the same response, 'we are interested and would consider your application hawever not untill you land in Calgary and in a position to commit'.
Since landing the only work hubby has only been able to secure (with 10 years Police experience) is a $15 per hour Security position.
He was always willing to start at the bottom however after 4 months and no fresh opportunities coming up we are faced with the decision, stay and fund our stay spending a big portion of our savings, which we would need for a deposit on a home in the hope something comes up but with the risk of 12 month down the line being in rented, in the same working position but with no deposit for a home.. OR return back to the UK where we can start back working at the same place we left with good pay.
We came Canada in the hope of being able to secure jobs with an average pay that would pay enough to provide a home with enough left over to allow us enjoy some of the outdoor living. It just so happens that although it works out for many people it just hasn't for us.
If it was just myself and my OH then we would probably last out a little longer however we take being a parent and being able to provide for our family very seriously and with banks both in Canada and the UK now refusing to give morgages to people with less the 10% deposit, if I use up all our money then it could put buying a house back by 5 years or more. Not a position that i want to find myself in.
I know you mentioned research but moving over to Canada this did not happen over night. From the point that we evaluated everything and decided 100% to move it was a further 6 months after that when we landed.... alot happens in 6 months, the Pound lost even more strength against the Dollar and the forcast that work opportunities were about to open didnt and still have'nt happened.
I would never put anyone off coming over here and giving it a go. If i knew 6 months ago what i know now I would still have come over. I have met some great people and enjoyed all the challenges but when you find yourself every month using up more and more of your savings, you eventually are forced into making a decision.
Stay with big risks or go back, (Hubby was earning 3 times what he earns here), buy a house and come out to Canada every other year on holiday.
We love Canada and would prefer to leave Canada still loving the country rather then stay a little longer and risk leaving feeling bitter and dissapointed.
I do understand that we should give it longer.. as 4 months is no trial really.. but if your lonely, under financial pressure and you can see no light at the end the Uk is more promising for us in the current climate.
No doubt when I get back to the Uk and start work, dealing with sex offences and nasty assaults etc.. Seeing the worst of the Uk in all its glory !!I will wish that things worked out here..
I need stability for my family..
Thank you to all who have PM'd me.. as usual you are all a fantastic support and taking the time to read and reply to me.
Top Cat
Jun 26th 2010, 5:34 pm
#53
Forum Regular
Joined: May 2007
Location: Saskatoon originaly Stafford, UK
Posts: 86
Re: Tried and failed!
Hey TC
People that see you as a failure are normally the jealous people back in the UK that don't have the balls to do what we have done. Don't see yourself as a failure, when we went back people were supportive for us.
But here in Saskatoon, they are recruiting Police here, they are short and I told you previously they are screaming for nurses here.
Get over here, you have one friend waiting for you to help you thru it. Saskatoon is a great place to live.
Julie
People that see you as a failure are normally the jealous people back in the UK that don't have the balls to do what we have done. Don't see yourself as a failure, when we went back people were supportive for us.
But here in Saskatoon, they are recruiting Police here, they are short and I told you previously they are screaming for nurses here.
Get over here, you have one friend waiting for you to help you thru it. Saskatoon is a great place to live.
Julie
Jun 26th 2010, 6:10 pm
#54
Banned
Joined: Oct 2008
Location: the GTA
Posts: 3,824
Re: Tried and failed!
Hey TC
People that see you as a failure are normally the jealous people back in the UK that don't have the balls to do what we have done. Don't see yourself as a failure, when we went back people were supportive for us.
But here in Saskatoon, they are recruiting Police here, they are short and I told you previously they are screaming for nurses here.
Get over here, you have one friend waiting for you to help you thru it. Saskatoon is a great place to live.
Julie
People that see you as a failure are normally the jealous people back in the UK that don't have the balls to do what we have done. Don't see yourself as a failure, when we went back people were supportive for us.
But here in Saskatoon, they are recruiting Police here, they are short and I told you previously they are screaming for nurses here.
Get over here, you have one friend waiting for you to help you thru it. Saskatoon is a great place to live.
Julie
Jun 26th 2010, 6:27 pm
#55
Joined: Sep 2008
Posts: 12,830
Re: Tried and failed!
Three months feels like a long time when you are not having fun. I doubt anyone immigrated and everything was as they expected.
My OH decided when she came out that she was going to give it three years, get citizenship and then if she did not feel settled she was going to go back. 15+ years later we're still here. It was not easy those first few years though.
The only failure is wanting something and not trying. We've all been there too one way or another I suspect.
My OH decided when she came out that she was going to give it three years, get citizenship and then if she did not feel settled she was going to go back. 15+ years later we're still here. It was not easy those first few years though.
The only failure is wanting something and not trying. We've all been there too one way or another I suspect.
Jun 26th 2010, 8:15 pm
#56
Forum Regular
Joined: May 2007
Location: Saskatoon originaly Stafford, UK
Posts: 86
Re: Tried and failed!
I still say there is a shortage of Police here, otherwise why would they say they need to recruit to get more Police !
Jun 26th 2010, 8:51 pm
#58
Forum Regular
Joined: May 2007
Location: Saskatoon originaly Stafford, UK
Posts: 86
Jun 26th 2010, 10:16 pm
#59
Joined: Jul 2005
Posts: 15,883
Re: Tried and failed!
Thank you for your negative reply.
Firstly research, We spent 3 months in Calgary in 2007 conducting research, a further 3 weeks in Ontario in June last year and a further week in Oct last year researching our move. I think that question is now answered.
I have 14 years Nursing experience, with a degree, and I also have 8 years Policing experience. We fully researched work and sent e mails from the UK but were always faced with the same response, 'we are interested and would consider your application hawever not untill you land in Calgary and in a position to commit'.
Since landing the only work hubby has only been able to secure (with 10 years Police experience) is a $15 per hour Security position.
He was always willing to start at the bottom however after 4 months and no fresh opportunities coming up we are faced with the decision, stay and fund our stay spending a big portion of our savings, which we would need for a deposit on a home in the hope something comes up but with the risk of 12 month down the line being in rented, in the same working position but with no deposit for a home.. OR return back to the UK where we can start back working at the same place we left with good pay.
We came Canada in the hope of being able to secure jobs with an average pay that would pay enough to provide a home with enough left over to allow us enjoy some of the outdoor living. It just so happens that although it works out for many people it just hasn't for us.
If it was just myself and my OH then we would probably last out a little longer however we take being a parent and being able to provide for our family very seriously and with banks both in Canada and the UK now refusing to give morgages to people with less the 10% deposit, if I use up all our money then it could put buying a house back by 5 years or more. Not a position that i want to find myself in.
I know you mentioned research but moving over to Canada this did not happen over night. From the point that we evaluated everything and decided 100% to move it was a further 6 months after that when we landed.... alot happens in 6 months, the Pound lost even more strength against the Dollar and the forcast that work opportunities were about to open didnt and still have'nt happened.
I would never put anyone off coming over here and giving it a go. If i knew 6 months ago what i know now I would still have come over. I have met some great people and enjoyed all the challenges but when you find yourself every month using up more and more of your savings, you eventually are forced into making a decision.
Stay with big risks or go back, (Hubby was earning 3 times what he earns here), buy a house and come out to Canada every other year on holiday.
We love Canada and would prefer to leave Canada still loving the country rather then stay a little longer and risk leaving feeling bitter and dissapointed.
I do understand that we should give it longer.. as 4 months is no trial really.. but if your lonely, under financial pressure and you can see no light at the end the Uk is more promising for us in the current climate.
No doubt when I get back to the Uk and start work, dealing with sex offences and nasty assaults etc.. Seeing the worst of the Uk in all its glory !!I will wish that things worked out here..
I need stability for my family..
Thank you to all who have PM'd me.. as usual you are all a fantastic support and taking the time to read and reply to me.
Top Cat
Firstly research, We spent 3 months in Calgary in 2007 conducting research, a further 3 weeks in Ontario in June last year and a further week in Oct last year researching our move. I think that question is now answered.
I have 14 years Nursing experience, with a degree, and I also have 8 years Policing experience. We fully researched work and sent e mails from the UK but were always faced with the same response, 'we are interested and would consider your application hawever not untill you land in Calgary and in a position to commit'.
Since landing the only work hubby has only been able to secure (with 10 years Police experience) is a $15 per hour Security position.
He was always willing to start at the bottom however after 4 months and no fresh opportunities coming up we are faced with the decision, stay and fund our stay spending a big portion of our savings, which we would need for a deposit on a home in the hope something comes up but with the risk of 12 month down the line being in rented, in the same working position but with no deposit for a home.. OR return back to the UK where we can start back working at the same place we left with good pay.
We came Canada in the hope of being able to secure jobs with an average pay that would pay enough to provide a home with enough left over to allow us enjoy some of the outdoor living. It just so happens that although it works out for many people it just hasn't for us.
If it was just myself and my OH then we would probably last out a little longer however we take being a parent and being able to provide for our family very seriously and with banks both in Canada and the UK now refusing to give morgages to people with less the 10% deposit, if I use up all our money then it could put buying a house back by 5 years or more. Not a position that i want to find myself in.
I know you mentioned research but moving over to Canada this did not happen over night. From the point that we evaluated everything and decided 100% to move it was a further 6 months after that when we landed.... alot happens in 6 months, the Pound lost even more strength against the Dollar and the forcast that work opportunities were about to open didnt and still have'nt happened.
I would never put anyone off coming over here and giving it a go. If i knew 6 months ago what i know now I would still have come over. I have met some great people and enjoyed all the challenges but when you find yourself every month using up more and more of your savings, you eventually are forced into making a decision.
Stay with big risks or go back, (Hubby was earning 3 times what he earns here), buy a house and come out to Canada every other year on holiday.
We love Canada and would prefer to leave Canada still loving the country rather then stay a little longer and risk leaving feeling bitter and dissapointed.
I do understand that we should give it longer.. as 4 months is no trial really.. but if your lonely, under financial pressure and you can see no light at the end the Uk is more promising for us in the current climate.
No doubt when I get back to the Uk and start work, dealing with sex offences and nasty assaults etc.. Seeing the worst of the Uk in all its glory !!I will wish that things worked out here..
I need stability for my family..
Thank you to all who have PM'd me.. as usual you are all a fantastic support and taking the time to read and reply to me.
Top Cat
You have likely already considered nursing positions in clinics or private facilities if not that might be worth a look.
Or as Schumachergal has said take a look at Saskatoon.
Best of luck with whatever you decide.
Jun 26th 2010, 11:34 pm
#60
Forum Regular
Joined: Apr 2008
Location: Was Leeds, UK now Peterborough, ON
Posts: 58
Re: Tried and failed!
I agree three months is no time at all in trying to feel settled and comfortable with your different (in all regards) life. I have only been here 7 months and had a wobble at around 3 months and again about a month ago (which was brought on with the loss of my dog in an accident whom we brought with us from England).
Like you, my hubby is working but I don't get a look in despite being highly qualified in my field. I am following a different career path and working for myself but yet to earn anything but I still feel like I have been working at it for such a short period of time.
I cannot advise you but you don't sound to me like you are desperate to go back just feeling at odds with how things are right now. I was told before I went to Canada to give it a year, which I think is sound advice. Your are on an emotional rollercoaster right now and although you might want to get off, it could be a bit dangerous to do so!
Hope you can ride your way through.
Good luck
Like you, my hubby is working but I don't get a look in despite being highly qualified in my field. I am following a different career path and working for myself but yet to earn anything but I still feel like I have been working at it for such a short period of time.
I cannot advise you but you don't sound to me like you are desperate to go back just feeling at odds with how things are right now. I was told before I went to Canada to give it a year, which I think is sound advice. Your are on an emotional rollercoaster right now and although you might want to get off, it could be a bit dangerous to do so!
Hope you can ride your way through.
Good luck