...and then what?
#31
Forum Regular
Joined: Jul 2010
Posts: 49
Re: ...and then what?
Well they didn't go back for obvious reasons - they couldn't afford the cost of travelling back home for starters...then there's the fact that there was nothing for them to go back to. The 60s/70s/80s and 2010 = not comparing like with like.
But you've a point in that people were probably a lot tougher back then in general.
But you've a point in that people were probably a lot tougher back then in general.
#32
BE user by choice
Joined: Oct 2010
Location: A Briton, married to a Canadian, now in Fredericton.
Posts: 4,854
Re: ...and then what?
jjanj, touched the spot for me, summed up quite well what I felt, thanks.
....and then what? Peace, happiness and a sense of belonging. I not only sincerely hope, but am going to do everything with my own mindset to ensure that that is the outcome.
I have been too much of a gypsy, but a very happy one, four countries, four different cultures, and four different languages and now many years on, groups of friends from everywhere.
But.... the last move! The settling down move? The I'm a grown up and a Mummy move! That's been a disaster. Lovely house, big river frontage, few financial problems, till just recently. .The BEST kid that was ever born, and on most days a reasonably super husband! I'm sometimes not too bad as a wife either.
I should never have moved to France. I've 'cracked' various cultures and made lifelong friends, but Everything is harder in France. Ten years on and I have good friends, but never a sense of belonging, we never fit in. Our son (aged 9) is sanguine about it, and shrugs off the low level, but constant drip feed bullying, but I can't cope anymore.
Canada will bring us together as a family. We will be able to do things socially, and people won't stare at us, when they realise that I'm English. We won't be constantly instantly judged, out of ignorance, and found to be wanting. My husband (Canadian) might have a chance of making friends who want to be friends and don't pretend they can't understand his accent.
Canada is a great big dream at the present, and one that I had never thought I'd want as a dream. I've visited lots of times to see family in BC and Calgary, but never imagined living there. Am I running away? Quite probably, but I just cannot take an 11th year of France. I'm Franced out now!
I have hung my star on Canada's tree. When I get there, I shall live, I shall fit in, and I will make friends! Life is going to be fantastic, as failure at this particular juncture is by no means possible. There have been aspects of the Canadian psyche, as I have experienced it over the years, that I haven't always appreciated, but you watch I'm going to start loving it now! I will love NB, and it's going to love me right back! Hopefully!
....and then what? Peace, happiness and a sense of belonging. I not only sincerely hope, but am going to do everything with my own mindset to ensure that that is the outcome.
I have been too much of a gypsy, but a very happy one, four countries, four different cultures, and four different languages and now many years on, groups of friends from everywhere.
But.... the last move! The settling down move? The I'm a grown up and a Mummy move! That's been a disaster. Lovely house, big river frontage, few financial problems, till just recently. .The BEST kid that was ever born, and on most days a reasonably super husband! I'm sometimes not too bad as a wife either.
I should never have moved to France. I've 'cracked' various cultures and made lifelong friends, but Everything is harder in France. Ten years on and I have good friends, but never a sense of belonging, we never fit in. Our son (aged 9) is sanguine about it, and shrugs off the low level, but constant drip feed bullying, but I can't cope anymore.
Canada will bring us together as a family. We will be able to do things socially, and people won't stare at us, when they realise that I'm English. We won't be constantly instantly judged, out of ignorance, and found to be wanting. My husband (Canadian) might have a chance of making friends who want to be friends and don't pretend they can't understand his accent.
Canada is a great big dream at the present, and one that I had never thought I'd want as a dream. I've visited lots of times to see family in BC and Calgary, but never imagined living there. Am I running away? Quite probably, but I just cannot take an 11th year of France. I'm Franced out now!
I have hung my star on Canada's tree. When I get there, I shall live, I shall fit in, and I will make friends! Life is going to be fantastic, as failure at this particular juncture is by no means possible. There have been aspects of the Canadian psyche, as I have experienced it over the years, that I haven't always appreciated, but you watch I'm going to start loving it now! I will love NB, and it's going to love me right back! Hopefully!
#34
Joined: Apr 2010
Posts: 120
Re: ...and then what?
And then what?
Well life my dear
Start work on that novel you sometimes dream about, write some poetry, write a play script/ movie script, take up those piano/french/spanish/guitar/bongo lessons you always wanted or that business opportunity you always thought about or trying to get into an industry that more suits you.
Life without passion is not a life worth living
Well life my dear
Start work on that novel you sometimes dream about, write some poetry, write a play script/ movie script, take up those piano/french/spanish/guitar/bongo lessons you always wanted or that business opportunity you always thought about or trying to get into an industry that more suits you.
Life without passion is not a life worth living
#35
Joined: Jul 2005
Posts: 15,883
Re: ...and then what?
What about all the thousands upon thousands of Brit families who emigrated to Canada, Oz, and NZ in the 60's, 70"s and 80's with no prior recce trip?
I bet you any money you like hardly any of them came back. If they didn't like their new country it was tough shit.
People these days are soft.
I bet you any money you like hardly any of them came back. If they didn't like their new country it was tough shit.
People these days are soft.
I would be one of those who arrived in the 60's.
#36
Forum Regular
Joined: Jul 2010
Posts: 49
Re: ...and then what?
You should slink down it! Hypocrisy is it? I think you realise there's a bit of a difference between people who head across the pond for an adventure with no commitments and those who uproot themselves, family etc to make a permanent move.
#39
Re: ...and then what?
In one sentence you're underwhelmed by the area you contemplated, yet you advise people to only contemplate a move to a country for the sheer love of it.
You can see how it could be confusing.
#41
Re: ...and then what?
Before anyone tries to ask me what the point of all the moving around is especially knowing that I will probably move again, don't bother because unless you are one of the aforementioned group of poor unfortunate lost souls who will probably come back as ghosts, you probably won't understand especially if you feel that you have found your own niche in life.
It has been great to read everybody's replies as it would appear that there have been many ways to interpret what I initially posted...
I love the idea of embracing my new life by doing exactly what I have dreamt of doing, such as writing that book I've been thinking about for example.
I want to settle in my new home but like jjanj said there are some of us who are gypsies, or wanderers and I could see myself getting a new itch in 7 years time which seems to be the length of time I stay anywhere!!
But for now I shall be putting all my energy into creating a loving home for my family and believing that Canada will be my forever home.
#42
Re: ...and then what?
I spent 13 years in France as part of my globe trotting and at the end wanted to go back to the UK, as you said "all Franced out" but if Canada still leaves me searching France would become a definite possibility again!! Good luck with your search
#44
Re: ...and then what?
I have always had two dreams. To live in Canada and to have a holiday hideaway in Key West Florida. I knew that I couldnt live in KW for a variety of reasons, the visa, the constant heat etc etc but to have my second home in paradise (as its known by many) will still be my dream.
So, once we are settled in Canada and living that dream, the KW holiday home will always be there, tucked away for when I have more money
So, once we are settled in Canada and living that dream, the KW holiday home will always be there, tucked away for when I have more money