Supporting a child back home
 

Hi all,

I have been told previously if you are emigrating and have a child from a previous relationship all Canada immigration ask is for you to prove the maintenance is being paid.

However having phoned child support today, they advised me they do not deal with clients who have moved abroad permanently and my case would be closed, so obviously I can prove I have paid the duration of the time in the U.K but cannot prove on going.

Just wondered if anyone else is in this scenrio or have been through it. I would be happy to send a cheque each month to my ex for the amount I am paying now, but will this later come back and bite me in the *** if she says iv never paid, is a cheque enough?

On the other hand I am slightly relieved as I was dreading them saying it would go up and not take into consideration the cost of living out there is more expensive .

Someone I know was paying by cheque each month for both his children and after a number of years his ex decided to say he has never paid and now they are chasing him for thousands which he has paid! that scares me!

Also the situation is not ammicable , if she had it her way I would be living on the streets and all my wages would be spent on her shopping habbit!

Any advice welcome,

Mike

Re: Supporting a child back home
 

The immigration people in London were content for me to get a letter from my ex stating that she was confident I would continue to pay. We weren't at each other's throats, so it wasn't a problem. The CSA were never involved.

I left some money in the UK and still have an income there. The maintenance (read her mortgage payments) are done via standing order and the proof is thus there.

Re: Supporting a child back home
 

No, no, no, and again, no. A cheque is not enough. Especially in light of your last sentence.

As advised, pay via your bank account.

Re: Supporting a child back home
 

I have a joint bank account with my ex solely for the purpose of support. It's convenient for me to deposit into and convenient for her to withdraw from. The method provides a record of deposits and withdrawals which RevCan have accepted as proof of payment.

I know of two snags:

- withdrawing in a currency other than that of the account is expensive. You can guess how much I fret over that.

- banks in Canada infer having a joint account to mean having all assets in common. If one of the account holders gets into financial trouble with the same bank the bank will raid the unrelated assets of the other. I don't see this as being a concern while the other party is outside Canada (and I have no seizable assets) but it's something to be aware of.

Re: Supporting a child back home
 

Whilst I agree direct debit is the safest way, surely if you've written cheques out to "Mrs Ex" for 'X' amount each month, as long as you can produce statements showing the amount debited to an ex partner, surely this is proof that a person has kept up child support payments? Or am I missing a point here?

Re: my Ex: I paid support by DD each month, but 'sundry' payments to her (school trips, scouts etc) were always paid by cheque, never cash. As I understood at the time, that was insurance should The Ex try to claim I hadn't been making payments of any kind.

IMO, the system of CIC demanding documentation from an Ex that you're making child support payments is seriously flawed. What business is it of theirs anyway? Especially as many provinces have a reciprocal arrangement with The CSA afaik? There's plenty of vindictive ex partners who would refuse to cooperate out of spite with an emmigrating ex partner.

Fortunately for myself, I had no dealings with the CSA & my ex wouldn't have gone down that route as under the CSA formula, I would actually have paid less each month.

Good luck to the O.P. anyway.

Re: Supporting a child back home
 

Why is a cheque not enough? If the cheque was photocopied it could then be compared to the bank statement showing its withdrawal.

I guess one would only really come unstuck if the recipient refused to deposit the cheque but, if the recipient was that nutty, they likely wouldn't provide their bank details so as to enable a direct debit or standing order to be set up anyway.

Re: Supporting a child back home
 

My OH got a letter from his ex and he paid by direct deposit through the banks. I also think a check would be enough as that still has to go through banks and therefore leaves a paper trail that can be followed up on.

Re: Supporting a child back home
 

I suppose it's adequate, if a little old fashioned.

However, as the person involved would likely be issuing these cheques over a period of many years, it seems to me that that is a lot of photocopied bits of paper. If the person involved is confident in their record keeping abilities, then great. If they are confident that their cheques will not get "lost in the post", then great. If they are confident that their ex spouse will not engage in tomfoolery, like lieing about receiving payment or otherwise causing CSA intervention, then great.

It should be noted that fair play and common sense are in short supply at the CSA. Anything to make life simpler and less prone to dispute is best IMO.

Re: Supporting a child back home
 

I don't disagree, I was just surprised to note that you were so against paying via cheque.

Re: Supporting a child back home
 

I suppose I'm all new fangled and trendy, then. Cheques? So very last century.

Re: Supporting a child back home
 

Until I moved to Canada I was on the receiving end of Maintenance payments through the CSA as my ex didn't want to support his children. For reasons mentioned above he believed i was spending all the money on myself! :(

As a bargaining tool to get permission from him to move over here I agreed for him not to pay any further maintenance and the CSA have now stopped.
They told me that once I was over in Canada the only power they would have would be to get arrears off him, not regular payments.

So forget about the CSA if you are in Canada. Can you get her bank account details? Then you can arrange a bank transfer which will show her details on your statement rather than just "chq no 62" for example...

Re: Supporting a child back home
 

Sounds a similar scenario...my ex refused to sign the consent letter to remove my 17 year old from the UK unless I completely closed down the CSA account! This has meant he has got away with paying the arrears he had accrued, well in excess of £15k. Would have come in very handy for her Uni fees. Some father :sneaky:

Re: Supporting a child back home
 

It shouldn't do, but I'm always surprised at the number of people with "ex's". Same goes when we catch up with people we knew/worked with in the UK as to how many are now onto their second partner. ( No judgement intended )

It sounds like a nightmare looking at the posts.

Re: Supporting a child back home
 

Same here.

One question i do have though out of curiosity since i've no experience or knowledge in this:

• If the custodian of the child/children marries again, is the ex still obliged to pay child support?

Re: Supporting a child back home
 

Why are you surprised? Divorce is rampant in the UK, as it is in Canada.

There are 15 houses on my street. I can think of at least eight inhabited by divorcees. A few others are inhabited by couples that never married.

Our decision to get wed a few years back met with wild indifference from everyone we told (apart from our mothers, who were both pissed off that we didn't tell them until after the event).