TheBear

You make a good point. But we lived in Toronto for a while. Way too expensive. I think we probably would have had a better social life there, mainly because of expats (not just Brits..we the friends we have made are from China, Jamaica, Holland etc). I have been all over Canada with my work...Vancouver, Quebec, St Johns, Winnipeg, Saskatoon, Edmonton, Calgary...pretty much everywhere. I see people are happy enough, and if I had been born here, I would be happy as I would be surrounded by friends and family, but I'm not, and the truth is people are polite but not friendly.

Two things I remember before I came that I wished I'd taken note of.

1. On a recce trip I was chatting to girl in a bar in Vancouver. She said I'd clean up as the men here are mind numbingly boring and only talk about hockey, trucks and fishing. I just took in the first part of the sentence.

2. My best mate in the UK warned me before we left that I'd hate it, Canadians were boring. I scoffed at him. He was right.

Jimbo2012

I get what you are saying but feel you may also be guilty of some over-generalisation.
I'm not a particularly social animal myself, but I have met many Ontarians (usually through sporting activities) that GET the banter/sarcasm vibe that we Brits enjoy. The only teetotallers I have met here are reformed alcoholics, but maybe that's a Peterborough thing!

As for returning to the UK, I still have strong family ties there but not strong enough to consider going back permanently.
Visits there just reinforce my decision to move to Canada, and I don't miss that general sense of negativity that seems to hang over everybody there, and how damn crowded it feels! Not to mention the general aggression that seems more prevalent in the UK, and the "permagloom" that passes for a climate.

Of course, everyone's perspective is different and I wish you well whatever you decide to do.

TheBear

I hear you man...rock and a hard place. Also, yeah, I am generalizing, there are some fab Canadians, who I will always be friends with, just not anywhere within a hundred kms! My wife is very sociable and easy to get on with, and while she has a circle of christian and non-christian friends, she maybe has kne or two at most she'd call good friends.

TheBear

Before I go to bed, I kind of feel Trudeau sums Canada up perfectly. Looks good, seems nice, sporty, but ultimately a bit bland.

Danny B

I'll take boring and quiet over chaotic and busy any day of the week. I don't miss the UK one bit.

Good luck to you though, I hope you make it back safely and pick up from where you left off. 6 years is a long time to be away.

Aviator

And many who have done just fine. It is a two way street, we have met loads of great folks. Joined lots of groups & volunteered, just got stuck in. Joined a new group last year, ended up on the board in 3 weeks and now folks talk to us as if we had been there for years.

For those thinking of moving to Canada, make up your own mind. The grass is not greener, same shit, different bucket. It is what you make of it.

Lorry1

I wrote that myself 4 years ago was in NS for 6 years was so depressed absolutely hated it. Found it boring, done everything there was to do and nothing left to explore. Did have some great friends, both Canadian and expats, but yes a very different culture and social life.
Now back in England 4 years. Absolutely no regrets about moving home, still really happy here.
Yes, traffic can get you down, and yes depressing outlook of some people can get you down too. But, if you are happy with your lot, and try to ignore the rest, then you will be fine.
Now home and happy, can look back on Canada in a different light and realise we did have some great times there.
Funny thing is, we may be moving back to NS in the future. Eldest daughter returned there to be with the boyfriend and youngest daughter may very well return there too as her best friend ever is there.
Never say never in life. Just go with the flow.
Good luck.

Shakyuk

Two things about this made me laugh.
The first; my mate says 'just sayin' all the time after dropping some controversial bomb in a conversation, I love it.
The second; totally wank. I've never seen something so British on this board before


Although you have been quoted about how you loved it here, I can respect someone who changes their mind and is open about it. People change and sometimes it's the big things we can get over, but the little things that slowly grind on us. It sounds like it's taken 6 years for the little things to grind you down and now you've had enough.


Best of luck in your move back to the UK!

raindropsandroses

Its funny, we've lived all over the world and in my experience nowhere is as friendly and welcoming as Canada, we've lived in two provinces and been to several others and have never had a problem making friends. Quite the opposite in fact.

I have found that (like anywhere) if people don't trust or see you as an acquaintance then conversation is bland, they stick to safe topics, but once you're one of their friends conversation is anything but bland, I've posted before about the terrifying over sharing .
I've also found people here in the Maritimes have wicked, dark senses of humour (which suits me to a tee) and know how to make mischief in all the best ways.

I wasn't at all happy when we lived in PEI, but so far I adore Nova Scotia and although we've only been here a couple of weeks we've made a lot of friends and have more invitations to stuff that we have time for, which is lovely.
I do have the seemingly magic combination of toddler and big fluffy dog which always seems to open doors to making friends,plus my husbands new colleagues are a fantastic bunch who all have young children too.

Moving to a place isn't a one size fits all, we didn't like PEI so we moved province, Canada is such a vast place that I think its very much trial and error finding a place that you like, we didn't expect to just rock up and settle immediately into the place we'd stay forever, we expected to have to try different places. Just sayin'

TheBear

Thanks Skakyuk. Probably won't be leaving till next spring as we had a flood in May and we are still waiting for a contractor to refit our basement...all insured, just getting someone to do the work is a challenge.

I feel a little guilty being quite so harsh about Canadians yesterday (slightly beer induced), but the fact is that there is nothing that I have said that I don't feel has a large amount of truth attached to it. Of course there are some great Canadians, but I just find that in general in the UK and many other places, people are more open and friendly, rather than merely polite.

In the long term we are off to NZ as the wife is from there and so we have loads of family...and I already have more mates there than I do here. Says it all really.

I will always treasure my memories of this amazing land though. It is beautiful, and quality of life is second to none. I was very positive for 4 and half years, but as you say, eventually things just wear you down and you realize you're banging your head against a brick wall.

TheBear

I must admit, I think people out East, are more down to earth and genuinely friendly. I think Ontario is uniquely cold in its politeness. I've always had a good laugh in Quebec, but couldn't live there because of the language issue.

dbd33

Is the basement flood practise for moving to the land of cold damp houses?

BristolUK

The name seemed vaguely familiar so I just took a quick look at threads started and such a downer on England may have been why.

The only times I can remember such a big change in opinion has been from people having moved provinces and even then that may have involved a 'chalk and cheese' type of move that may have been possible within the same province. but it sounds like you already did that.

Best of luck.

TheBear

Good to hear your perspective. See everything there is to see here, done with trees and lakes. Because our family are in the UK and NZ I think Never may well apply once we are gone.

In some ways now we know we are going we can relax and make the most of our remaining time and appreciate the many good things this beautiful land has to offer.

Howefamily

IMO I think you are in the wrong spot. I have a ton of friends who are down to earth, sarcastic, humourous and funnily enough are not church-goers.
You say you miss the culture where everyone takes the piss out of each other but theres also the very aggressive take no prisoners culture in the UK too which I see all over FB daily which makes me cringe.


I think its easy to get the hate on when you feel like you have had enough and then everything aggravates you. Be cautious of that driving your (potentially) very expensive return. It may well be exactly what you need, it may not be. Being as open minded as can right now will help.


Good luck in whatever you decide to do.