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"Saying hello" and other manners
Just wondering... QC idiosyncrasy or trans-Canadian behavioural pattern?
I've been living in the same block o' condos for three years now. The population there is pretty constant - I see the same faces over and over. Still, I can't help being amazed (and, let's face it, frustrated) when nobody greets nobody, no matter what the place of bumping into each other might be - lift, lounge, main door etc. My atttempts to say "Hello" (well, OK, "bonjour") are met (most of the time) with indifferent silent stares (how could one do this? look the other person right in the eye and say nothing?), heads turning quickly the other way or, quite rarely, nonsensical mumblings (well... at least there's SOME response!). Furthermore, my personal statistics tell me that elderly persons are less likely(!) to greet/answer back than younger ones. I would've thought the opposite were true, but then the very few "bonjour"s I've had so far were voiced out by under-25 people. And, surprise, surprise - this is NOT a slummy block of flats I'm talking about, but maybe the best condo complex in Quebec City, situated in a very sought-after area. Oh, well... |
Re: "Saying hello" and other manners
Ah thats the French Canadians then?
Originally Posted by DaveTheCat
(Post 4601030)
Just wondering... QC idiosyncrasy or trans-Canadian behavioural pattern?
I've been living in the same block o' condos for three years now. The population there is pretty constant - I see the same faces over and over. Still, I can't help being amazed (and, let's face it, frustrated) when nobodody greets nobody, no matter what the place of bumping into each other might be - lift, lounge, main door etc. My atttempts to say "Hello" (well, OK, "bonjour") are met (most of the time) with indifferent silent stares (how could one do this? look the other person right in the eye and say nothing?), heads turning quickly the other way or, quite rarely, nonsensical mumblings (well... at least there's SOME response!). Furthermore, my personal statistics tell me that elderly persons are less likely(!) to greet/answer back that younger ones. I would've thought the opposite were true, but then the very few "bonjour"s I've had so far were voiced out by under-25 people. And, surprise, surprise - this is NOT a slummy block of flats I'm talking about, but maybe the best condo complex in Quebec City, situated in a very sought-after area. Oh, well... |
Re: "Saying hello" and other manners
Geez, around here in the UK if you said 'hello' to someone on the street they'd probably knife you. Think yourself lucky :).
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Re: "Saying hello" and other manners
Originally Posted by bazza2154
(Post 4601085)
Ah thats the French Canadians then?
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Re: "Saying hello" and other manners
Originally Posted by MarkG
(Post 4601267)
Geez, around here in the UK if you said 'hello' to someone on the street they'd probably knife you. Think yourself lucky :).
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Re: "Saying hello" and other manners
This must vary from place to place.
I find Calgarians to be friendly. I don't live in an apartment building, but both of my sons live in apartments. When I go to visit them, the people whom I pass in the hallways and with whom I share elevators always greet me. I find that it's not uncommon for strangers in Calgary to chat when they're waiting in line somewhere (in the supermarket or wherever). When someone is pushing a baby in a stroller or walking a dog, it's quite common for people to stop and ask the baby's age or to comment on the dog. But even people without babies and dogs sometimes comment to each other about the weather when they pass each other on a path in a park. |
Re: "Saying hello" and other manners
Ohh, don't think I could live anywhere like that. Here everyone says hello to eveyone else, just passing on the street, even if you know them or not!
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Re: "Saying hello" and other manners
Originally Posted by TrishB
(Post 4601321)
Ohh, don't think I could live anywhere like that. Here everyone says hello to eveyone else, just passing on the street, even if you know them or not!
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Re: "Saying hello" and other manners
Originally Posted by TrishB
(Post 4601321)
Ohh, don't think I could live anywhere like that. Here everyone says hello to eveyone else, just passing on the street, even if you know them or not!
But that's nice to hear. In the UK it seems that if someone says hello to you in the street, you wonder what they want, or whether they are about to steal your wallet. |
Re: "Saying hello" and other manners
You know, the odd thing is that I have a Calgary friend who is a native of Montreal (but she has lived in Calgary for over twenty years). The last time we got together, she was telling me how much she missed Montreal, and how cold (in the social sense) and sterile she found Calgary.
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Re: "Saying hello" and other manners
Originally Posted by DaveTheCat
(Post 4601030)
Just wondering... QC idiosyncrasy or trans-Canadian behavioural pattern?
I've been living in the same block o' condos for three years now. The population there is pretty constant - I see the same faces over and over. Still, I can't help being amazed (and, let's face it, frustrated) when nobody greets nobody, no matter what the place of bumping into each other might be - lift, lounge, main door etc. My atttempts to say "Hello" (well, OK, "bonjour") are met (most of the time) with indifferent silent stares (how could one do this? look the other person right in the eye and say nothing?), heads turning quickly the other way or, quite rarely, nonsensical mumblings (well... at least there's SOME response!). Furthermore, my personal statistics tell me that elderly persons are less likely(!) to greet/answer back than younger ones. I would've thought the opposite were true, but then the very few "bonjour"s I've had so far were voiced out by under-25 people. And, surprise, surprise - this is NOT a slummy block of flats I'm talking about, but maybe the best condo complex in Quebec City, situated in a very sought-after area. Oh, well... I suspect that proximity to the home is a key element to this. French Canadians are family oriented and the home has a little exclusion zone around it. Only family is allowed into that zone. They don't, in my experience inter-react with their neighbours in the same way I remember doing in the UK and Ontario. I've been in this house 2 1/2 years now. I slightly know the neighbours either side. We'll chat if we bump into each other but have no idea what the insides of each others' houses look like. Parents who come here to pick up their kids usually don't even get out of the car. I saw the same mentality when I lived in France years ago. You worked "at" a company, not "for" it. In other words you didn't socialise with people from work. Here it seems to be: "I live next door to you, or our children are friends; and your point is......?". I've been to lots of Xmas, New Year etc do's here, some quite large. I don't recall meeting anyone that wasn't family or a GF/BF of family. Get them out of that bubble and I find them to be as friendly as anyone. |
Re: "Saying hello" and other manners
Originally Posted by Judy in Calgary
(Post 4601519)
You know, the odd thing is that I have a Calgary friend who is a native of Montreal (but she has lived in Calgary for over twenty years). The last time we got together, she was telling me how much she missed Montreal, and how cold (in the social sense) and sterile she found Calgary.
But well, in the end, everything is in the eye of the - beer holder, or something. ;) |
Re: "Saying hello" and other manners
Originally Posted by MarkG
(Post 4601267)
Geez, around here in the UK if you said 'hello' to someone on the street they'd probably knife you. Think yourself lucky :).
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Re: "Saying hello" and other manners
Originally Posted by DaveTheCat
(Post 4601275)
Maybe - or maybe not. That's exactly what I'd want to find out. I'm trying to find explanations other than "what would you expect, they're French, aren't they?" (er... no, in fact they're FAR from being fanboys of "those cheese-eatin' surrender monkeys";) They're just... well... "a distinct society".
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Re: "Saying hello" and other manners
Originally Posted by Souvenir
(Post 4601544)
Get them out of that bubble and I find them to be as friendly as anyone.
You should see the expression of disbelief on their faces when I'm being courteous and let someone in or out in traffic; nobody is expecting such gestures and virtually nobody waves back or makes any other sign of saying "Thank you". |
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