whyleric

......me and the wife have been toying with the idea of moving over to Canada for the past few years now. I am a plumber and we have both got family over there (albeit I have never even met them) so I can't see us having too much trouble getting in. I have used the points calculator in the past and I have more than enough.

The trouble is, we have recently moved from a medium sized town to a medium sized village. Myself and the kids have settled down fine as I grew up in a village, but the missus has struggled to adapt to a new way of life. She is used to the town atmosphere, rather than everyone knowing everyone elses business.

Since we have moved, she hasn't mentioned Canada once. My fear is, how will she cope moving thousands of miles away, when she has struggled to move 5 miles.

Any advice would be welcomed with open arms

Judy in Calgary

Sorry, I'm not going to try to be a shrink and suggest how you might resolve the issue with your wife.

I just want to point out that assessing your points is close to useless. The good news, though, is that, as a plumber, you should be able to get into Canada on a temporary work permit fairly quickly. When I say "quickly," I mean within a year or so.

I suggest you read the Wiki article called Beginner's Guide to Canadian Immigration.

Hope that helps.
x

whyleric

Thanks for your quick reply. I will give that a try.

bazzz

Read the "Returning to the UK" forum and find out what happens when people try and move when one of them isn't keen. It ain't pretty.

G586

I'll second that.....

It is not a recipe for a happy life.

Rich_007

Thirded.

It is not a recipe for a happy wife.

Oops I misread. Or maybe I didn't.

R.

N1k1002003

Both hubby and I are plumbers. I said one day I wanted to move to Canada having visited for 2 weeks 18 years ago :-) He had never been. He was from a small village with a population of 1800. I moved from Edinburgh to his village and understand what your wife feels with everyone knowing everyone!

Hubby wasnt so sure about the move in fact I dont think he thought I was being serious but 6 weeks later we were on a plane :-) Being a Plumber you can go on a temporary permit which means you can get a feel for the place first before you decide what you want to do and if she doesnt like it go home, at least you can say you tried. That was my thoughts, I didnt want to wait till I was 60 and then say "I wish I had..............."

We had a Job, LMO approval and told to go within 3 weeks, not everyone is as quick but I was and glad I came, although some hurdles along the way :-)

MademoiselleMtl

If you want to remain married it is probably best you stay put. If she has not mentioned moving to Canada, chances are she does not want to move.

Marriage can already be a challenge without adding an international move to the mix...

TheStennings

Know the feeling as far as my misses isn't overly keen to go due to missing friends/family but interested in other ways of potentially 'better' way of life (certainly different) then over here. I get the missing family as I have more here to lose I just figure better opportunities for the kids and for us and to get out of this yobbish place ....

If she hasn't mentioned Canada then instead of talking of a 'move' how about just talking to her with about going over to Canada for a 1-2 week holiday/break ? if the answer is less than enthusiastic i think that will answer the whole moving out there issue but if she likes the idea or at least warms to it then it opens up the discussion or in the very least go out for a break and discuss the moving upon return while she (in theory) would still be full of being out there.

dwight-van-man

Ask her maybe its the location she's not happy with rather than the actual move... If she's a city girl, go over on a reccy and look at what town life means compared to rural life. She'll maybe be happier if she knows your going to move to a decent sized town and she knows what facilities etc she should expect..

MrsP

Hi Whyleric

They do have Towns in Canada LOL

You really need to have a talk to your wife, find out what her fears and reservations are, like someone else said it may be that she just does not like village living and if you moved to a larger town in Canada she could be happier, its not just about distance.

Once you know what your wife's fears are you will be in a better position to deal with them.

Have you been to Canada for a recce trip? if not I would suggest going, your wife cannot be positive about moving if she has not experienced what Canada has to offer.

Let us know how things go
Take care
Mrs P

Tanah

Hi - im certainly no expert but a couple of things spring to mind

1- if you were thinking of moving to canada why would you go to the trouble of moving house?
2- You mentioned that you and the kids had settled well in your new home - maybe your wife thinks that YOU no longer wish to go
3- you kind of indicated that you havent spoken of it either - again maybe she thinks the same thing that you are ie/ you dont want to go
4- It seems on the surface your wifes issues with the move were more to do with moving to a quieter place rather than distance.

my advice for what its worth would be - talk to your wife first of all and see how she feels, arrange a recce trip (as someone else mentioned) go visit different areas and let her make an informed decision, but the most important thing is to talk , trying to guess what another person is thinking is the worst thing you can do - as in my case i usually get it wrong lol

good luck

lauder99

Hi there

at the risk of sounding like a shrink, which I am not. I would suggest speaking to your wife rather than us. My wife and I had a few false starts where emigration is concerned because we didn't really talk to each other properly. We were both working on assumptions of what each other wanted and not talking about what we actually wanted.

I don't mean to trivialise your situation because I can relate, Canada has loads to offer and you can find any kind of place to live City, Town, Rural or even the Northern Territories.

We moved out of Edinburgh into a rural town a few years back and for us it pretty much confirmed our desire to move abroad. Its possible your wife has similar feelings but doesn't want to rock the boat as you and the kids have settled so well.

Cheers
Tom

annie3-4

My advice.... dont do it unless everyone concerned is 100% committed to the idea.
Its easy to say "well we can always come home" ..in reality it is not easy at all.
Stress, upheaval, financial loss,worry,doubt, uncertainty etc etc.
Good luck with whatever you BOTH decide.

iaink

Visit Canada?

Seems obvious, but maybe Canada isn't what you are looking for anyway.... Either she will like it and be persuaded, or she wont and it will save you years of time and expense to find out its not going to work anyway.

That and talk to your wife, not us. We don't have to live with her