rwin

We live on a short curved street. One day when my oldest daughter was about 4, she was standing on her bed looking out the window when a car came racing past the house at some rediculous speed for the street. We could hear her from the living room saying, "Holy SHIT!!!" I said, "What did you say Jamie?" In a much quieter voice she said, "holy cow???"

Not sure where she learned that word. Must've been the neighbour kid.

==========

My wife's cousin said "F**K" in front of her 6 year old son. He told her, "Thats a bad word." She said, "How do you know?" He said, "My teacher told us in school." She said, "Why did your teacher tell you its a bad word?" He said, "Ummmm, ummmm, ummmmmm, I don't know, ummmmm, she just told us."

smiges33

first just put it on nz site as i have been reading here and nz. so then put it on all BE sites. all with same title. feel free to go look. nz got most at minute. like i said if you really had enough of things for a while it will cheer you up. had me in stitches at what some kids come out with.

feel free to leave karma if you like them

smiges

smiges33

5 year old came out with "he hurt my feeling" had to choke back the laughter as i was driving. turns out he was playing dead monsters and it was his turn to play dead.

Alberta_Rose

Here's another from elder son .... aged about 4, he was playing on the climbing frame when he slipped and landed with one leg on either side of the lowest rung ......

Tears springing from his eyes, he asserted ..... "now I'll NEVER be able to have children!"

(I know I shouldn't have laughed.......)

Alberta_Rose

... and another .... in the queue at our local shop, I noticed he was fidgetting somewhat.

"Do you need a wee?" I asked him.

"No Mummy," he replied straight-faced. "I am just holding my willy"

Silverbug

I have no kids to add to this thread but dont they say the funniest things??!!

smiges33

no kidding and usually straight faced as well.

one from my daughter when she was 4.
we had a couple of her cousins sleeping over and all being about the same age they were top and tail sleeping. well as you can imagine they just wouldnt go to sleep. after being in loads of times i finally lost the plot. and said to her "right thats it, if you dont go to sleep then you can sleep in the bath", without batting an eyelid and straight away replied "what with water in daddy" had to walk away holding my ribs trying not to die laughing.

a couple of months later after trying to get her to eat her tea i told her if she didnt eat her tea she would be in trouble. so she just told me to put it in the bin. to which i told her if she didnt eat up i would put her in the bin (not that i had any plans to). needless to say she wouldnt eat. so marched her to the kitchen held her upside down over the bin and told her she would go in. to which she promply replied. "well go on then daddy im waiting" had to put her down on the floor again before i acutally dropped her in the bin laughing. she on the other had was disappointed as she wanted to go in the bin.

eldoran

It was a usual stressful schoolday morning. I was trying to get 4 boys and myself all ready to get out of the door. I had picked my boots up to put them on but must have put them down somewhere.... they were nowhere to be seen.

So, in my usual stressed way (which doesn't achieve much, I have to add!), I'm raving round the house shouting that I'm off my rocker and have lost my marbles :curse:. Couldn't find my boots anywhere... then walked into my bedroom and found them on my bed...mud and all! As I'm stood there in despair.. I hear a little voice behind me and my 7 year old said in all seriousness...'Mommy, if you've lost your marbles, you can borrow some of mine, they're in my bedroom in the black bag.' I couldn't stop laughing and he really didn't understand why! Bless him!

username 34

my oldest - now a huge 5 - keeps asking when he and I will get married, and then daddy can go live somewhere else and it will be just him and me. He also tries to kich the oh out of our bed if he wants in next to me .... he doesnt like the competition

FraggleJH

My eldest (4 1/2) had to come along to the vaccination clinic with me when our then 4 month old had her jabs. After asking the nurse all about what she was going to do and what exactly were in the vaccines, he was not very impressed that she made his little sister cry.

After demanding that the nurse put plasters (bandaids) on his sisters legs he then turned around and said 'I'm really fed up with you!'. At the same clinic 2 months later another nurse enquired as to whether my son was the same boy who told her colleague off? Seems that this comment made the rounds.

So looking forward to his next Jabs on Tuesday. He's learnt a few more interesting words since our first visit.

pretz

Few year ago, talking my 8ish-month old son out of the bath and dripped a bit of water from his body onto the then 3-yr old daughter head as I passed him overhead to the towel. Daughter blurts out in a very serious stern face;

"Dad, I doesn't like that BUM juice on my head. Why you always dribble that BUM juice on my head???"

swoops

What our kids say to us.." you don't understand " like we weren't kids once....

rwin

While shopping in Home Depot one day just before Christmas (when our youger daughter was about 3) there was this guy with a big beard shopping. He looked like the biker type.

Our daughter saw him and said, "SANTA!!!!!!!!!!"

sarah_matt

my husband and i were in the car talking about our neighbour. I said "an ambulance came today and took the old lady away in the bungalow" my son replied (aged 6 so that would be 3 years ago) "What did Dic & Dom do?" my husband and i just looked at each other! i turned to may son and asked why he said that, to which he replied "Dic and Dom in Da Bungalow - what did they do?" to which we fell about laughing! Bless!

MrsLauder99

Yup, you can always spot the child with the parent who is a nurse!

I got caught out with that one with my daughter (now 5) who has been bugging me how babies are born. Book bought and serious (and I think fairly decent explanation given)

Picture the scene yesterday morning when husband walks in to see my daughter on sofa playing "having a baby" with her 3 year old brother. Say Ohhhh Ohh you have to go down there and goalie it!!! Poor hubby didn't know where to look