__TJ__

My son is being targeted by some pretty nasty trolls I just wondered is there an online authority here I can report them to or just go to RCMP? (Includes death threats and suggestions he should self harm and suicide so not just names etc)

I have googled it but couldn't find anything for bc it's all Ontario way!

Martin the cdn expat

BC was the home of Amanda Todd.

There should be something set up in BC now.

Martin the cdn expat

http://www.stopabully.ca/

http://www.erasebullying.ca/


death threats should go directly to the RCMP.

Siouxie

That is terrible and I am so sorry that your son is going through this.

There are a few websites I found that may help, but I think your foremost action should be to remove your son's online presence as far as you can. He needs to understand that his protection and health is more important than him being online at the moment.

Yes, you should report it to your local police force, your isp provider (particularly if he is getting emails) and every website that he is being bullied on. Most of the social media sites have a complaints button. Cyber bullying is a criminal offence and needs to be dealt with asap. From what I read, you should not delete the messages as they may be needed for prosecution purposes.

http://www.cyberbullying.ca/ (some good info on what to do)

http://www.cbabc.org/For-the-Public/...iminal-Law/206

http://www.erasebullying.ca/resource...rces.php#cyber

http://www.victimlinkbc.ca/

http://www.rcmp-grc.gc.ca/qc/pub/cyb...rcrime-eng.htm

https://www.facebook.com/AmandaMiche...dAbusePetition

I hope you manage to get this sorted out quickly.

Aviator

Report this to the providers of the websites or e-mail hosts, with headers from e-mails. Print everything out in case it ends up being deleted. Report it to the RCMP and the school board and school councilors. Also report to your own internet provider.

Consider cutting off his access to the internet for a while.

MillieF

Yes, get him off line for a while or go on the Internet together, and change all of his contacts.

You are changing your son's school I think? If these kids are from his last school, go and see the Principal, immediately. The schools are opening up (ours next week). Make sure to print a copy, and yes go to the RCMP.

Very best of luck, this is every bit as horrid for a kid as a physical attack.

__TJ__

Thanks all for the advice.

The site is an IRC channel which doesn't have a report abuse button, also I have contacted the "originators" (they don't moderate, which is part of the problem) so the one helpful one I found said they did not take responsibility for actions of users per the disclaimer when you sign up. I pointed out they are still bound by the law and they blocked me.
We have printed out the scripts, it's not a forum it's closer to a chat room, but I've printed it anyway.

He is changing school but these are random tecchys not people he knows (his user Id is nondescript) so school won't help much, that said we are meeting his new school next week and I plan to ask her to help us with safeguarding him online if she had advice etc, she deals with autistics all day and may have some insight to offer.

Also I've left a message for our RCMP tech abuse guy who is away today but will call me tomorrow, they've advised in the meantime to keep him off that site and print stuff out so we are on that.

Have spoken at length to him about how this is not acceptable and that I will see it stopped, even if all we can do is to stop him going on that irc all together.

Poor thing doesn't need this!

Will link the links to him so he can have a read and we will talk more about it. Thanks again.

Siouxie

Just a thought, but where does the IRC channel originate? If it's in the US, can you use the US laws to make a complaint to the authorities?

phat-dave

in fairness irc is a well known unmoderated medium, it is regarded by some as the underground for illegal and pirated software, child pornography, pedophiles that groom children plus mass trolling and abuse.

you should cease the access to irc and look at blocking the commonly used irc ports within your router (6666/6667/6668/7000 etc).

if he wants to feel part of conversations and that he is contributing to a "community" then encourage a forum environment where they are moderated.

MillieF

I don't know this medium either....but if I don't, I make sure my son doesn't ...so how does TJ's? You don't send your kid out for a walk without knowing (or at least hoping to know) where it's going...you have to try to guide your child along a reasonable Internet path....there is a lot of advice available. Could a Wiki be started perhaps? For new parents to Canada....although I suspect the dangers are the same in every country...certainly I have been invited to attend a couple of workshops for parents both here and in my last home.

Siouxie

Does your son chat (text) 'live' on xbox or the PS3? Does he play online games on them or on his computer that have chat rooms? Did you ever 'chat' on MSN groups?

Those are IRC's. A lot of games have chat rooms available, unfortunately some are not 'audited' as well as others.

Lychee

IRC = Internet Relay Chat. It's a global chat room, and typically completely unmoderated. IRC was the way most people used to chat online before there was the WWW. I used to use IRC back in the mid-90s. I can't fathom how it must have evolved since, but I'm figuring not a whole lot. Not to make light of the bullying, but you yourself have identified it as trolling behaviour. I would look into the host server that the IRC channel is being hosted on and contact them to see if they can ban the bullies from accessing the server.

To figure out the hosting server, you'll need to find out from your son how he connects to IRC. I assume he's using a program like mIRC? If so, they generally already have the servers input, then it's a matter of selecting one to use. Here's a list of the servers: http://www.mirc.com/servers.html

The list of the servers have direct links to their webpages. Hopefully you can find an e-mail address or a contact form. I would contact the server your son is using and see if anything can be done from their end to ban the bullies.

CanadaJimmy

I don't agree with cutting off the internet access - that is not a positive resolution to the situation. Even if it was Facebook, they have developed new cyberbullying tools that give the victim more options than simply going offline since that is not always the best course of action.

IRC channels and servers are extremely varied, I happen to frequent some that are full of helpful and nice people. The Freenode IRC network is a good example of a server where many people go there to get help with questions. Other servers and channels however can be full of horrible people, but as long as your son does not use his real name or phone number he is unlikely to be followed outside the room to be harassed, so in this case your son should simply be able to stop going to that room and that will be the end of it. One advantage of IRC is that you can create your own channels very easily, so if he has friends in that channel, he can create a second channel, block the unpleasant people, and still be able to socialize online.

IRC does expose your IP address however, so it is not 100% secure in the sense that someone can usually find out what city you are from, though not usually your exact location.

MillieF

No, he's on Skype, and Facebook...he is on MSM but only with his school group from before we came to Canada. Also, as he's 12, I don't let him do any of this stuff out of the kitchen or sitting room where we are. I am a 'friend' on Facebook as then I can see what he's up to....yes, I do regularly go through his history and sites to see what he's been seeing. There are some scary people out there and the arn't getting their mits on my kid...if I can help it

__TJ__

hi, ok most of this IRC is new to me. he uses freenode and loves that he can chat to tecchys and uses a pseudenym and doesnt even tell them what province he is in, his IP address is blocked etc etc. he has his own channel but he likes to help and chat with others but there is a bad element on one particular channel that seem to like to wind him up ( unfortunately tho its all funny to them i get to deal with the fall out) we have an agreement that he will avoid the channel that those people seem to frequent and he has blocked them from his room but they apparently are able to bypass that ( as he explains it to me you can block an entire ISP address - so everyone in a household - but allow specific people who are known to the operators and allowed access unfettered. unfortunateley two of the people attacking him are unfettered as he has tried to block them and found they simply restart it. )

as for letting your child go to the park without knowing where they are going, its a whole different ballgame with an aspergers syndrome child. this may well sound like an abdication of parental responsibility and if you feel that way once ive explained then thats your right, im not new to being thought badly of because of the way my family lives because of my son. the amount of little old ladies that tutted at us in supermarkets >sigh< im past it now. i pulled on the big girl pants and my family make do. one day he will be bill gates, or mark zuckerberg, or Dr. Evil. ( im hoping for world peace, but who knows!)

anyway. jack had monitored access to the internet when he was 6, he found a way round my passwords for parental controlls, so we cut off his internet - might have as well cut off his oxygen. its how he breathes. you will never understand so i wont spend long trying to convince you but trust me when i say i suffer more than he does when we take away his internet and its akin to beating him as far as he is concerned. he'd literally rather be whipped with a belt buckle than be without access so i will not be going there. this is how my family works and as i said, you will never understand.

jack can build a computer and get it on the internet in about 20 minutes. we got him a raspberry pi as an experiment. also he has had burnt out old junkers from the tip and resurrected them in a way that is kind of scary and a bit lawnmower man. he has internet on at the moment a three computer mainframe set up in his bedroom. i knwo where he goes because he choses to tell me but if he was running 888.com from the bedroom id never know it!

he doesnt use social networking. never been on FB or twitter or bebo etc as he is not interested in interacting with people that know him he has no actual friends ( its a function of the aspergers he doesnt seem to need them altho im hoping when he changes schools he will make acquaintances)

i heard back fromt he RCMP today. they told me much of what had been said above about IRC, its a chatroom ( as i understand what that is!) and no logs are kept. without a court order server logs cant be subpoenad(sp) and the few photos i took on my phone of the screen contained very carefully worded non-threats. apparently "why dont you go die in a fire" is not the same as " i will burn you to death in a fire" this is common in late teens who know the score. they can use disturbing language thats not technically illegal. he said the same as some of you have suggested, block IRC or keep him off the specific rooms. but not a whole lot we can do.

ive discussed with him the recent suicides in uk and BC and what drove people to even think about it. i hope im getting thru to him, he doesnt seem to be taking that side of it seriously anyway. again i will speak to his new school next month about it so they can cover it along with the rest of his education ( they do social responsibility and personal attacks etc)

i appreciate you all weighing in, especially that nobody has felt the need to ridicule or make light. i am worried about him but he seems to be doing ok right now. im keeping an eye ( in the best way possible given the circs) he has a base level of anxiety and normally it runs about a 5/10 but right now every little thing sets him off so its like juggling sabres here. the long summer holidays isnt helping either. anyway. thank you all and i will keep you updated if there is anything new.