The choices we make, not the chances we take, determine our destiny.
Jul 5th 2005, 8:32 pm
#1
Gone Walkabout
Thread Starter
Joined: Mar 2005
Posts: 611
The choices we make, not the chances we take, determine our destiny.
I am probably in contravention of several copyright laws here, but I saw the title of this thread on a poster today, and it just seemed relevant enough to bore you all with!! 
Many of us have, or are in the process of, leaving our comfort zones, our families and our friends to undertake what is, probably, the most unnerving experience of our lives. Preparation and research will take us so far, but most of us are still undertaking what amounts to an act of faith of biblical proportions!
Looking at some of the threads on the 'Returning Home' forum, I can't help but feel that so many people just kind of 'fall into' the act of emigration, rather than actually planning it.
There are many occassions where they have spent only 3 - 6 months in their chosen countries, and are now desperate to return. That is not emigration...that is a holiday.
I am approaching the first anniversary of my AOR (July 20th), and I am seriously questioning my motives for this move. I have remained upbeat and positive since starting this whole crazy rollercoaster ride, in February 2004, when the 'fact collection' process began, but I am now thinking that perhaps it would be a mistake to continue. Maybe it is just a case of the miseries, but I can't help thinking that if this fails, I would be in serious trouble, both financially and mentally.
Have any of you out there been in this position? Has anybody had second thoughts? Or am I just being a silly old sod who should stop crying into his beer?
Many of us have, or are in the process of, leaving our comfort zones, our families and our friends to undertake what is, probably, the most unnerving experience of our lives. Preparation and research will take us so far, but most of us are still undertaking what amounts to an act of faith of biblical proportions!
Looking at some of the threads on the 'Returning Home' forum, I can't help but feel that so many people just kind of 'fall into' the act of emigration, rather than actually planning it.
There are many occassions where they have spent only 3 - 6 months in their chosen countries, and are now desperate to return. That is not emigration...that is a holiday.
I am approaching the first anniversary of my AOR (July 20th), and I am seriously questioning my motives for this move. I have remained upbeat and positive since starting this whole crazy rollercoaster ride, in February 2004, when the 'fact collection' process began, but I am now thinking that perhaps it would be a mistake to continue. Maybe it is just a case of the miseries, but I can't help thinking that if this fails, I would be in serious trouble, both financially and mentally.
Have any of you out there been in this position? Has anybody had second thoughts? Or am I just being a silly old sod who should stop crying into his beer?
Jul 5th 2005, 8:59 pm
#2
BE Forum Addict
Joined: Mar 2004
Location: Cheshire England
Posts: 1,125
Re: The choices we make, not the chances we take, determine our destiny.
Originally Posted by Scouse
I am probably in contravention of several copyright laws here, but I saw the title of this thread on a poster today, and it just seemed relevant enough to bore you all with!!
Many of us have, or are in the process of, leaving our comfort zones, our families and our friends to undertake what is, probably, the most unnerving experience of our lives. Preparation and research will take us so far, but most of us are still undertaking what amounts to an act of faith of biblical proportions!
Looking at some of the threads on the 'Returning Home' forum, I can't help but feel that so many people just kind of 'fall into' the act of emigration, rather than actually planning it.
There are many occassions where they have spent only 3 - 6 months in their chosen countries, and are now desperate to return. That is not emigration...that is a holiday.
I am approaching the first anniversary of my AOR (July 20th), and I am seriously questioning my motives for this move. I have remained upbeat and positive since starting this whole crazy rollercoaster ride, in February 2004, when the 'fact collection' process began, but I am now thinking that perhaps it would be a mistake to continue. Maybe it is just a case of the miseries, but I can't help thinking that if this fails, I would be in serious trouble, both financially and mentally.
Have any of you out there been in this position? Has anybody had second thoughts? Or am I just being a silly old sod who should stop crying into his beer?
Many of us have, or are in the process of, leaving our comfort zones, our families and our friends to undertake what is, probably, the most unnerving experience of our lives. Preparation and research will take us so far, but most of us are still undertaking what amounts to an act of faith of biblical proportions!
Looking at some of the threads on the 'Returning Home' forum, I can't help but feel that so many people just kind of 'fall into' the act of emigration, rather than actually planning it.
There are many occassions where they have spent only 3 - 6 months in their chosen countries, and are now desperate to return. That is not emigration...that is a holiday.
I am approaching the first anniversary of my AOR (July 20th), and I am seriously questioning my motives for this move. I have remained upbeat and positive since starting this whole crazy rollercoaster ride, in February 2004, when the 'fact collection' process began, but I am now thinking that perhaps it would be a mistake to continue. Maybe it is just a case of the miseries, but I can't help thinking that if this fails, I would be in serious trouble, both financially and mentally.
Have any of you out there been in this position? Has anybody had second thoughts? Or am I just being a silly old sod who should stop crying into his beer?
You are not alone in your thoughts, and I suspect there are quite a few others on this forum that have doubts from time to time. We have, and still do, question whether we are doing the right thing for all the reasons you have stated and a few more. Incidentally we are on almost the exact time line as yourself.
What about Gerrard eh?
Jul 5th 2005, 9:22 pm
#3
Happy in Canada.
Joined: Jun 2004
Location: Winnipeg, manitoba
Posts: 1,440
Re: The choices we make, not the chances we take, determine our destiny.
Think you said it yourself
"an act of faith of biblical proportions!"
Worst case scenario is your chosen destination is not the right for you.
Well what then? have a back up plan. If you like the sound of Toronto and hate it when you get there where next England or Vancouver or Calgary or .... look now what will the information do but give you options?
We planned to fail and were prepared to move from Winnipeg but 7 years in we are still here. Moved once from rented to owned and looking again for some thing else. Wife actually wants to move back to the Area we rented in as she says it feels like home. Came here no job and minimum savings. 1st company went broke without paying us still in 2nd job. luckily
So unstable yes, worried no do that when I get there. as people say shit happens and then we die.
If everything goes sour completely we have a UK credit card for the flight and bedroom floor at me mum's in the UK and bum on the good old dole.
"an act of faith of biblical proportions!"
Worst case scenario is your chosen destination is not the right for you.
Well what then? have a back up plan. If you like the sound of Toronto and hate it when you get there where next England or Vancouver or Calgary or .... look now what will the information do but give you options?
We planned to fail and were prepared to move from Winnipeg but 7 years in we are still here. Moved once from rented to owned and looking again for some thing else. Wife actually wants to move back to the Area we rented in as she says it feels like home. Came here no job and minimum savings. 1st company went broke without paying us still in 2nd job. luckily
So unstable yes, worried no do that when I get there. as people say shit happens and then we die.
If everything goes sour completely we have a UK credit card for the flight and bedroom floor at me mum's in the UK and bum on the good old dole.
Jul 5th 2005, 10:56 pm
#4
Just Joined
Joined: Jan 2003
Posts: 25
Re: The choices we make, not the chances we take, determine our destiny.
your definately not on your own m8 , I have my visa now and reel between upbeat with no worries and looking forward to the future to blind panic of the unknown...
we are undertaking the most stressfull thing anyone can do , to move from all we know way outside of our comfort zones , outside of everything we know ... but i concentrate on how much better Ill feel once my fears start to become unfounded (lol i worry about everything so i do this a lot) ... and if where i go doesnt work out Ill scrabble together as much cash as i can and move somewhere else within canada
guess if we put our dreams to one side through worry we will never get to live any of them
funny my horoscope today was that i was stuck , iced in , and movement generates heat and i should move to break free ... kinda cheered me up as i was pretty nervous about the whole thing today lol
we are undertaking the most stressfull thing anyone can do , to move from all we know way outside of our comfort zones , outside of everything we know ... but i concentrate on how much better Ill feel once my fears start to become unfounded (lol i worry about everything so i do this a lot) ... and if where i go doesnt work out Ill scrabble together as much cash as i can and move somewhere else within canada
guess if we put our dreams to one side through worry we will never get to live any of them
funny my horoscope today was that i was stuck , iced in , and movement generates heat and i should move to break free ... kinda cheered me up as i was pretty nervous about the whole thing today lol
Jul 5th 2005, 11:03 pm
#5
BE Enthusiast
Joined: Mar 2005
Posts: 353
Re: The choices we make, not the chances we take, determine our destiny.
Originally Posted by Scouse
I am probably in contravention of several copyright laws here, but I saw the title of this thread on a poster today, and it just seemed relevant enough to bore you all with!!
Many of us have, or are in the process of, leaving our comfort zones, our families and our friends to undertake what is, probably, the most unnerving experience of our lives. Preparation and research will take us so far, but most of us are still undertaking what amounts to an act of faith of biblical proportions!
Looking at some of the threads on the 'Returning Home' forum, I can't help but feel that so many people just kind of 'fall into' the act of emigration, rather than actually planning it.
There are many occassions where they have spent only 3 - 6 months in their chosen countries, and are now desperate to return. That is not emigration...that is a holiday.
I am approaching the first anniversary of my AOR (July 20th), and I am seriously questioning my motives for this move. I have remained upbeat and positive since starting this whole crazy rollercoaster ride, in February 2004, when the 'fact collection' process began, but I am now thinking that perhaps it would be a mistake to continue. Maybe it is just a case of the miseries, but I can't help thinking that if this fails, I would be in serious trouble, both financially and mentally.
Have any of you out there been in this position? Has anybody had second thoughts? Or am I just being a silly old sod who should stop crying into his beer?
Many of us have, or are in the process of, leaving our comfort zones, our families and our friends to undertake what is, probably, the most unnerving experience of our lives. Preparation and research will take us so far, but most of us are still undertaking what amounts to an act of faith of biblical proportions!
Looking at some of the threads on the 'Returning Home' forum, I can't help but feel that so many people just kind of 'fall into' the act of emigration, rather than actually planning it.
There are many occassions where they have spent only 3 - 6 months in their chosen countries, and are now desperate to return. That is not emigration...that is a holiday.
I am approaching the first anniversary of my AOR (July 20th), and I am seriously questioning my motives for this move. I have remained upbeat and positive since starting this whole crazy rollercoaster ride, in February 2004, when the 'fact collection' process began, but I am now thinking that perhaps it would be a mistake to continue. Maybe it is just a case of the miseries, but I can't help thinking that if this fails, I would be in serious trouble, both financially and mentally.
Have any of you out there been in this position? Has anybody had second thoughts? Or am I just being a silly old sod who should stop crying into his beer?
Welcome to the real world!! Patsy, you have summed up the fears/hopes of everybody who ever went anywhere in this world!!!
We all feel this way....we are all scared sh*tless...but we all have the guts and drive to go forward!!! Personally, the people who say that "Yes, I would have done this/ that the other" give me the screaming shi*s!!! Sod it , lets's call a spade by a spade!!! They give me the screaming SHITS!!!!
Boy, that feels good!!
Without hope, and belief, and desire....what are we???
Patsy, you are special!! You are one in a million!! You have the drive, the determination, the guts to move on!!!
To hell with all the 'friends' who say "what are you doing?", "What about the children?", etc. This is YOUR life. You only get one chance. Use it...follow your dreams...follow your desires... do what YOU want to do.....and let the dreamers carry on dreaming!!!!
Scouse
Jul 5th 2005, 11:06 pm
#6
BE Enthusiast
Joined: Mar 2005
Posts: 353
Re: The choices we make, not the chances we take, determine our destiny.
Originally Posted by Scouse
I am probably in contravention of several copyright laws here, but I saw the title of this thread on a poster today, and it just seemed relevant enough to bore you all with!!
Many of us have, or are in the process of, leaving our comfort zones, our families and our friends to undertake what is, probably, the most unnerving experience of our lives. Preparation and research will take us so far, but most of us are still undertaking what amounts to an act of faith of biblical proportions!
Looking at some of the threads on the 'Returning Home' forum, I can't help but feel that so many people just kind of 'fall into' the act of emigration, rather than actually planning it.
There are many occassions where they have spent only 3 - 6 months in their chosen countries, and are now desperate to return. That is not emigration...that is a holiday.
I am approaching the first anniversary of my AOR (July 20th), and I am seriously questioning my motives for this move. I have remained upbeat and positive since starting this whole crazy rollercoaster ride, in February 2004, when the 'fact collection' process began, but I am now thinking that perhaps it would be a mistake to continue. Maybe it is just a case of the miseries, but I can't help thinking that if this fails, I would be in serious trouble, both financially and mentally.
Have any of you out there been in this position? Has anybody had second thoughts? Or am I just being a silly old sod who should stop crying into his beer?
Many of us have, or are in the process of, leaving our comfort zones, our families and our friends to undertake what is, probably, the most unnerving experience of our lives. Preparation and research will take us so far, but most of us are still undertaking what amounts to an act of faith of biblical proportions!
Looking at some of the threads on the 'Returning Home' forum, I can't help but feel that so many people just kind of 'fall into' the act of emigration, rather than actually planning it.
There are many occassions where they have spent only 3 - 6 months in their chosen countries, and are now desperate to return. That is not emigration...that is a holiday.
I am approaching the first anniversary of my AOR (July 20th), and I am seriously questioning my motives for this move. I have remained upbeat and positive since starting this whole crazy rollercoaster ride, in February 2004, when the 'fact collection' process began, but I am now thinking that perhaps it would be a mistake to continue. Maybe it is just a case of the miseries, but I can't help thinking that if this fails, I would be in serious trouble, both financially and mentally.
Have any of you out there been in this position? Has anybody had second thoughts? Or am I just being a silly old sod who should stop crying into his beer?
Jul 5th 2005, 11:47 pm
#7
Glasgow Rangers
Joined: Feb 2004
Location: London, Ontario
Posts: 1,548
Re: The choices we make, not the chances we take, determine our destiny.
Originally Posted by Scouse
I am probably in contravention of several copyright laws here, but I saw the title of this thread on a poster today, and it just seemed relevant enough to bore you all with!!
Many of us have, or are in the process of, leaving our comfort zones, our families and our friends to undertake what is, probably, the most unnerving experience of our lives. Preparation and research will take us so far, but most of us are still undertaking what amounts to an act of faith of biblical proportions!
Maybe it is just a case of the miseries, but I can't help thinking that if this fails, I would be in serious trouble, both financially and mentally.
Have any of you out there been in this position? Has anybody had second thoughts? Or am I just being a silly old sod who should stop crying into his beer?
Many of us have, or are in the process of, leaving our comfort zones, our families and our friends to undertake what is, probably, the most unnerving experience of our lives. Preparation and research will take us so far, but most of us are still undertaking what amounts to an act of faith of biblical proportions!
Maybe it is just a case of the miseries, but I can't help thinking that if this fails, I would be in serious trouble, both financially and mentally.
Have any of you out there been in this position? Has anybody had second thoughts? Or am I just being a silly old sod who should stop crying into his beer?
I am in the biggest comfort zone of my life
Wife and I have great paying jobs, both have great company pension schemes, both have great time off, me I get 9 weeks off a year, good old civil service for you
Why the **** are we doing all of this uprooting !!!!
To hopefully better our lives, especially our kids, give them a better chance in life.
Will it be disasterous for us if it fails, course it bloody will. I will be commiting financial Hari Kari if it fails, but hey wait a minute, I am not even off the starting blocks yet and I sometimes get second thoughts, so who knows what the **** state of mind I will be in, around the 18 month mark
We, the wife and I have had umpteen discussions about this move and YES I will admitt it being the big hairy arsed Scotsman, I am shitting myself about this whole life absorbing, sometimes soul destroying mission.
So Scouse there it is, in black and white
YES I am shitting myself and YES I have already had second thoughts, but hey wait another minute,
We shall improvise, overcome and adapt to get to our ultimate goal
CANADA HERE WE COME
Eddie
Jul 5th 2005, 11:56 pm
#8
Lost in BE Cyberspace
Joined: Jul 2004
Location: Victoria, BC Canada
Posts: 61,698
Re: The choices we make, not the chances we take, determine our destiny.
Originally Posted by Voyager970
Comfort Zone
I am in the biggest comfort zone of my life
Wife and I have great paying jobs, both have great company pension schemes, both have great time off, me I get 9 weeks off a year, good old civil service for you
Why the **** are we doing all of this uprooting !!!!
To hopefully better our lives, especially our kids, give them a better chance in life.
Will it be disasterous for us if it fails, course it bloody will. I will be commiting financial Hari Kari if it fails, but hey wait a minute, I am not even off the starting blocks yet and I sometimes get second thoughts, so who knows what the **** state of mind I will be in, around the 18 month mark
We, the wife and I have had umpteen discussions about this move and YES I will admitt it being the big hairy arsed Scotsman, I am shitting myself about this whole life absorbing, sometimes soul destroying mission.
So Scouse there it is, in black and white
YES I am shitting myself and YES I have already had second thoughts, but hey wait another minute,
We shall improvise, overcome and adapt to get to our ultimate goal
I am in the biggest comfort zone of my life
Wife and I have great paying jobs, both have great company pension schemes, both have great time off, me I get 9 weeks off a year, good old civil service for you
Why the **** are we doing all of this uprooting !!!!
To hopefully better our lives, especially our kids, give them a better chance in life.
Will it be disasterous for us if it fails, course it bloody will. I will be commiting financial Hari Kari if it fails, but hey wait a minute, I am not even off the starting blocks yet and I sometimes get second thoughts, so who knows what the **** state of mind I will be in, around the 18 month mark
We, the wife and I have had umpteen discussions about this move and YES I will admitt it being the big hairy arsed Scotsman, I am shitting myself about this whole life absorbing, sometimes soul destroying mission.
So Scouse there it is, in black and white
YES I am shitting myself and YES I have already had second thoughts, but hey wait another minute,
We shall improvise, overcome and adapt to get to our ultimate goal
CANADA HERE WE COME
EddieHey there bud - how the heck are you? Your holiday must be coming up very soon now!
Jul 6th 2005, 12:06 am
#9
Glasgow Rangers
Joined: Feb 2004
Location: London, Ontario
Posts: 1,548
Re: The choices we make, not the chances we take, determine our destiny.
Originally Posted by willmore
Hey there bud - how the heck are you? Your holiday must be coming up very soon now!
You dont read your PM's do you
Sent you a few and you blanked me !!!!!! ( spat my dummy out )
Yes we canny wait, we leave on the 16th July for 23 days.
Send me a wee PM, miss your banter,
Eddie
Jul 6th 2005, 12:09 am
#10
Lost in BE Cyberspace
Joined: Jul 2004
Location: Victoria, BC Canada
Posts: 61,698
Re: The choices we make, not the chances we take, determine our destiny.
Originally Posted by Voyager970
Hey me dear how are you !!!!!
You dont read your PM's do you
Sent you a few and you blanked me !!!!!! ( spat my dummy out )
Yes we canny wait, we leave on the 16th July for 23 days.
Send me a wee PM, miss your banter,
Eddie
You dont read your PM's do you
Sent you a few and you blanked me !!!!!! ( spat my dummy out )
Yes we canny wait, we leave on the 16th July for 23 days.
Send me a wee PM, miss your banter,
Eddie
Loved your positive message! Excellent attitude!
Jul 6th 2005, 12:35 am
#11
Premium Member
Joined: Feb 2004
Location: Ontario.
Posts: 1,928
Re: The choices we make, not the chances we take, determine our destiny.
Originally Posted by willmore
I seriously don't remember getting any from you for ages now! But will send a pm soon I promise!
Loved your positive message! Excellent attitude!
Loved your positive message! Excellent attitude!
Eddie, you have put into your usual eloquent words exactly what everyone, at some point, feels!!! There will always be the nights of palpitations and worrying about succeeding, even I can hold my hand up to this, but our plan if we were to fail would be to do something else.....like get a job (god forbid!). We would never consider going back to the UK though - Canada is our home, no question about it.
I've only been here for 7 months and money has dripped away like water BUT we are getting there slowly. We have to tighten our belts until summer 2006 and then we should be fine.
Best of luck to everyone. It is a rollercoaster ride......but the best blooming rollercoaster ride I've ever been on!!
Jul 6th 2005, 7:30 am
#12
Gone Walkabout
Thread Starter
Joined: Mar 2005
Posts: 611
Re: The choices we make, not the chances we take, determine our destiny.
Thanks, guys and gals.......I knew I could rely on you all to get me back on track!! 
See you all in Canada!!
Scouse
See you all in Canada!!
Scouse
Jul 6th 2005, 8:04 am
#13
Lotus-eater
Joined: Jan 2004
Location: Cascadian Autonomous Elysian Region
Posts: 5,069
Re: The choices we make, not the chances we take, determine our destiny.
Originally Posted by Scouse
Thanks, guys and gals.......I knew I could rely on you all to get me back on track!!
See you all in Canada!!
Scouse
See you all in Canada!!
Scouse
Been there, up down sideways worried, excited, anxious, depressed, thought about binning the idea, wondered when the job offers would come through - they did then wondered if the time would run out and we'd lose the precious job offers (it didn't/we didn't).
Seen our house price drop, exchange rate plumment, prices in Canada increase and still we don't give a toss - there's more to life than money - there's dreams and ambitions and hopes and they more effin exciting than mundane crap. We weren't doing it for money, but for lifestyle/QOL factors.
So when it get dark and gruesome think about WHY you applied and what you want to achieve from it -that's the GREAT STUFF of life.
And remember - only a handful of the many 1000's who immigrate that fail and go home - for many reasons/factors. There's no shame in that, either. And don't be skewed my some of the miserable gits that have started to infest this forum. Sure, there's a reality check, but focus on the + not the - and you'll live a happier life, and have an easier PR process.
Keep your faith !
Rich.
Jul 6th 2005, 8:28 am
#14
BE Forum Addict
Joined: Mar 2004
Location: Cheshire England
Posts: 1,125
Re: The choices we make, not the chances we take, determine our destiny.
Originally Posted by Patsy
i think its that fella Gerrard thats given u the miseries
Jul 6th 2005, 9:00 am
#15
Joined: Oct 2004
Posts: 7,715
Re: The choices we make, not the chances we take, determine our destiny.
Originally Posted by Scouse
Many of us have, or are in the process of, leaving our comfort zones, our families and our friends to undertake what is, probably, the most unnerving experience of our lives. Preparation and research will take us so far, but most of us are still undertaking what amounts to an act of faith of biblical proportions!
Looking at some of the threads on the 'Returning Home' forum, I can't help but feel that so many people just kind of 'fall into' the act of emigration, rather than actually planning it.
There are many occassions where they have spent only 3 - 6 months in their chosen countries, and are now desperate to return. That is not emigration...that is a holiday.
I am approaching the first anniversary of my AOR (July 20th), and I am seriously questioning my motives for this move. I have remained upbeat and positive since starting this whole crazy rollercoaster ride, in February 2004, when the 'fact collection' process began, but I am now thinking that perhaps it would be a mistake to continue. Maybe it is just a case of the miseries, but I can't help thinking that if this fails, I would be in serious trouble, both financially and mentally.
Have any of you out there been in this position? Has anybody had second thoughts? Or am I just being a silly old sod who should stop crying into his beer?
Looking at some of the threads on the 'Returning Home' forum, I can't help but feel that so many people just kind of 'fall into' the act of emigration, rather than actually planning it.
There are many occassions where they have spent only 3 - 6 months in their chosen countries, and are now desperate to return. That is not emigration...that is a holiday.
I am approaching the first anniversary of my AOR (July 20th), and I am seriously questioning my motives for this move. I have remained upbeat and positive since starting this whole crazy rollercoaster ride, in February 2004, when the 'fact collection' process began, but I am now thinking that perhaps it would be a mistake to continue. Maybe it is just a case of the miseries, but I can't help thinking that if this fails, I would be in serious trouble, both financially and mentally.
Have any of you out there been in this position? Has anybody had second thoughts? Or am I just being a silly old sod who should stop crying into his beer?
IMO, I think a lot of the '3-6 month returners' you are referring to might be making decisions to return based too much on how they feel maybe because they have not fully appreciated the potential for negative feelings that migration can stir-up. Or maybe they just haven't planned effective ways to cope if/when it happens. I don't know maybe some people really think migrating is a cake walk and when it isn't, the sh*t hits the fan.
I suspect without all these worries about emigrating you'd still be a silly old sod though