The 'Are you for Real?' Thread
 

So, in the spirit of putting some fresh snags on The Barbie (awful metaphor I know :)) I thought we could try this. We all know people IRL who make us go 'Are you for real?' What has someone done to make you think, or say this?

NB Please keep it as unoffensive as possible, I'd like it to stay in The Barbie as I'm too much of a weakling to venture into TIO:lol:

I'll go first.

A parent invited DS and some other boys to go for a day's playdate with her son at their house. I was expected to provide him with snacks AND lunch. No special diets involved. I was very:blink: and :huh: and then:unsure:

If my kids have friends staying, even if it's just from over the road, I will offer them drinks etc and if it was for the whole day, I would most certainly supply food.

Other parents responses seemed to indicate that this was the norm for this family.

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That's fair. As you said the invite was for a "play date". Not a "play date, snacks and drinks" :)

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Did you have to provide him with his own soap and toilet paper?:ohmy:

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:rofl:

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Sounds a bit :blink: Never heard of kids going to play on either side of the workd and taking their own food! I mean if they don't want the kid to stay for lunch why not just say its a morning or afternoon thing!

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I'm with you, Rasen! I was a house-husband*** (parent of first resort to our small son) for six years, and I never heard of such a thing as asking a visitor to bring food. It was a normal part of the deal to feed visiting kids the same as we fed our own. Dear God! What's the world coming to?

***This was in the Caribbean where I live, not Australia; but I would have been shocked to have had your experience wherever I was.

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My sister reckons its the height of rudenss to invote someone's kids to come over and then not to treat them as she would treat adult guests, offer them food, drinks, make them feel welcome!
Wonder what the parents are like when they have friends over........"Oh yes dahling, come for drinkies and dindins, BYO food and drink of course......."

Maybe it stems from the Aussie habit of "bring a plate" - they invite you to a morning tea that brings the office to a halt for your birthday, then tell you to bring a plate........and something ON the plate, apparently!

Re: The 'Are you for Real?' Thread
 

:nod: It is the same here.

Kids invited to a party or otherwise means the parents turn up with the 'bring a plate' thing.

We found it very odd in the early years that when folk brought a bottle of wine and a few cans to drinks and nibbles at someone's house , they guarded their booze carefully and then took what they didn't drink home with them, right down to the half can.

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I refuse to do it.If I turn up with drink it becomes common property and I don't take it with me. Must be my British habits dying hard! Could also explain why I don't get many invites, they all think I'm weird!

Part of the fun as kids was seeing what you got at other people's houses :thumbup: I just don't get why you ask a child for lunch and tell them to bring their own. What do they do if mum forgets? let them starve i guess, punish em by making them watch the other kids eat?

Actually in Rasen's shoes, I'd send the kiddie either with a super posh huge lunch that makes everyone else envious!! And tell them they can't share but must bring home the leftovers!

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My eldest had a friend like that - the mother would invite kids to sleep over and not feed them. We used to find out how many kids were going and shop accordingly on the way so no one would starve.

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:thumbsup:

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Can't stand it either. I do though, send my kids with sweets and crisps snacks etc when they go to their pals houses, as feeding a bunch of kids their lunch or dinner is fine, but with teenagers - they could eat you out of a house! So I do think its polite to send some snacks to share.

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Don't make it an Aussie thing as it's not - it's an asshole thing

We've never experienced it - with kids or adults

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No, it's not an aussie thing. The friend of my daughter's that was like it, had never had a dad, the mum was on the bones of her backside as a single mum (that's her story anyway) and both her and the daughter have eating disorders so to them it's normal. I feel sorry for the kid, she's now 17 and doesn't hang with our kids any more because she's so tiny that she looks like she's in early primary school and she's so thin that she's miserable and in pain all the time. It's awful.

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I 'm not trying to make it one or the other, just I never ever experienced this idea of bringing a plate to work, or to peoples houes before i moved here. Yes sometimes we'd agree that someone would bring a dessert for dinner etc, and at work sometimes a person would bring in doughnuts if they felt like it on their birthday, but I have never been invited to -for instance-a party arranged in my honour, which I didn't want anyway -and been told to bring a plate of food for everyone. I had the last laugh, the woman who had accessed my date of birth (without permission) on the personnel records and organised it all, forgot to check the leave calendar to see who would be miles away at the time.........!!

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That's sad

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Ooh poor thing. Are the disorders medical or has her upbringing had something to do with it I wonder. I know from experience stress can do dreadful things to your appetite and even to your ability to eat.
If I am in any environment where there is an argument or disagreement going on I can lose my appetite for about 3 days instantly. Even out with someone for a meal, a row at the next table makes it hard for me to eat even if I'm not involved. All stems back to arguments surrounding food, years ago, and means I rarely accept an invite to eat out with people.

Re: The 'Are you for Real?' Thread
 

I get the 'bring a plate' thing, especially if it's a biggish bash you're are holding. I usually just say bring a salad or something you particularly like. In the UK, I never asked people to bring a plate, but if they asked if they could bring anything, I would just say, whatever you like. I never ask anyone to bring a plate here, but if someone offers, I will just say the same. And I will, and have always, offered to bring something, both here and the UK. It's just polite isn't it? :unsure:

What slightly irked me is that we had the young lad over at ours for a couple of hours as a favour as the mum had to take her daughter somewhere. He didn't come with any food, and even though he was only here for a short time, I still fed him.

As it turns out, S couldn't go.

Anyway, anyone else got any 'are you for real?' stories??

Re: The 'Are you for Real?' Thread
 

It's an old school ballet thing passed down by those that never quite made it because of their body shape I reckon. The school, doctors, friends and family have all tried to intervene but the mother is in denial.

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I have a million - I was married to an absolute gem. A couple of classics are:

When I was in labor with our first child, he wouldn't take me to hospital until we'd found marrow bones for our dogs. The catch was, he couldn't leave the car because he didn't want to put his shoes on due to an ingrown toenail so, with water having broken, I'm gushing and rushing around butchers trying to find bones. Found them, he dropped me at hospital and went to work.

For the last couple of years I lived with him, our only communication was via his emails. Every morning I woke to my "to do" list, carefully planned and in the order I had to do each task. There would also be some rant about something me or the kids had done. But one of my absolute favourites was his email about how he'd been out the back fagging in the middle if the night and had smelt gas so as soon as I got up I needed to check to see if the bbq gas bottle was turned off.

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Agree
I don't know any cultures that would do anything of the sort. Usually the complete opposite and stuff the kids so much they cant eat their dinner.
If you cant feed why invite? (and there are circumstances where you should not invite - i.e. when your kids have just got over gastric flu, nice to tell me after I pick them back up)

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Don't know whether to laugh or cry in disbelief

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It's okay to laugh because I no longer live like that and neither do two of my three kids. The youngest still goes 50/50 but that could change.

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OMG. Glad you're out of that now.

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Is this woman for real?

I've got a large batch of nearly new saucepans on Gumtree, clearly marked norrth Brisbane, pick up only.
So I get a reply from some woman, wants more details, give her everything I can, then say Is she able to pick up? Is she local?
Ahhhh - no - she's in Taiwan! :unsure:
WTF!!

Flipping timewasters :eek:

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Bahaha, classic.

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Hey, nice lady, you wanna buy saucepans? One Meerkat owner....!!:lol:

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Ahem, so, either you were drunk when you bought them or someone who didn't know you very well gave you them. ;)

I take it the nearly new is from the batch of potions you mixed up:sneaky:

Residents at the village I work, came home today to no power. Turns out SA PN, who were supposed to connect a different unit, accidentally(!) disconnected the wrong unit.

This, on top of ongoing problems in the area relating to the NBN and Telstra with Tesltra FINALLY admitting there is an issue with the local exchange, something I've been telling them since the end of November!!

Are they for REAL???

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:lol: You know me too well!! No, I was storing them for someone who no longer wants them and says I can try and sell them :sneaky: Don't think I've ever actually bought a saucepan, all mine were second hand donations. Got a couple of frying pans I bought new though :)

They aren't called Hellstra for nothing!

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If I added up how much money I've probably spent feeding other people's kids, I might work out how much Prosecco it could buy me and kick them all out onto the streets, my own kids included. Fair play to the younger Italian generation though who have tried Yorkshire Puddings, Cottage Pie and other things they've never heard of. I'm glad my kids are comfortable enough to invite friends back home even though Mummy is a crazy English lady and not very Italian :)        

Re: The 'Are you for Real?' Thread
 

When it's BYO it varies.
Often your contribution goes into a fridge to be used up by the party, by the host, or when it's just you over, often remembered, quite touchingly, for your return so that it can be offered back as a guest...sometimes if the host is generous, your contribution sort of tops up their 'fund' which is then of course a nice thing for all. People come here and often leave whole boxes of champagne..!

The only person I know who guarded a beer was a battler sort. Maybe it was out of respect for only keeping within their means, so I respect and tolerate it. Not everyone can split a bill evenly, not everyone can share evenly. People on mixers might not share.

Most of the time, esp at smaller gatherings, people leave booze, it's polite to offer it back, judge it case by case...get it...case by case...

Re: The 'Are you for Real?' Thread
 

😱Polly, even on the basis that there might be an issue?!

I do recall days when a lot of money was spent and there was assumptions that everyone could share a very expensive meal.

Stress makes me eat more!

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Jesus wept. How perfectly (Aussie) Public Service!!!!!! Some companies do keep tabs of birthdays for a card, but would nornally ask...

The value of ByO is for 'impromptu' dinners arranged around kids in holidays at short notice

Everyone gets fed, including parents, and the house owner isn't out of pocket or indeed further stressed : eg when a play date with a few kids turns into a summer evening party for all..very common here