Would you 'lock' a 2 year old in their bedroom?
Jun 10th 2010, 10:06 pm
#61
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Re: Would you 'lock' a 2 year old in their bedroom?
Em x
Jun 10th 2010, 10:11 pm
#62
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Re: Would you 'lock' a 2 year old in their bedroom?
ITA
I agree with others.
Never ever lock a child in a room.
Ignore minor tantrums - time out if possible.
If the child is kicking etc, hold them in a bear hug that controls them but also makes them feel secure. It's frightening for a small child to feel out of control - they need reassurance that you can manage their intense feelings.
Never ever lock a child in a room.
Ignore minor tantrums - time out if possible.
If the child is kicking etc, hold them in a bear hug that controls them but also makes them feel secure. It's frightening for a small child to feel out of control - they need reassurance that you can manage their intense feelings.
Jun 10th 2010, 10:14 pm
#64
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Jun 10th 2010, 10:28 pm
#66
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Re: Would you 'lock' a 2 year old in their bedroom?
Ive noticed kids seem to be smacked alot more here than the UK. My friend and I went camping in Dwellingup and there was this Irish lady married to an Aussie guy, she was belting those kids every five minutes - you could hear the sound of hand on nappy on the toddler.
I wondered if it was a 'cultural thing', but the Aussie father said aloud 'nothing wrong with a good thrashing'.
Seen it in the supermarkets as well. I feel quite sorry for the kid actually, imagine half the shop watching you get your arse smacked. I often cringe when I hear parents yelling at that kids stuff like 'You are bloody stupid, you idiot' or things similar.
Although it cant be easy being a parent, I do wonder what effects such discipline has on the child
My friends next door neighbour calls her little girl (about 4/5) a See You Next Tuesday because she wets the bed.
Point being, we shouldn`t torture our children, but they have to learn important lessons early on, and if that includes being locked in their rooms for short calming periods of time, surely this is harmless.
I got smacked and locked in my room at times, sorry but it worked, i was left to reflect upon my actions, and it certainly did me no harm, infact probably the opposite.
Each to their own, but a critical balance is massively important, Kids have to learn.
Tim
I got smacked and locked in my room at times, sorry but it worked, i was left to reflect upon my actions, and it certainly did me no harm, infact probably the opposite.
Each to their own, but a critical balance is massively important, Kids have to learn.
Tim
We do time outs that last no longer than 5 minutes because little people don't have very long attention spans. If his time out was any longer he'd probably forget what he was being punished for!
Discipline is important and instilling it early is vital but 2 year olds aren't mature enough for this kind of punishment, he struggles to say his own name and sometimes calls me dad instead of mum so how's he going to understand that sometimes he needs to be locked away? Bloody cruel if you ask me.
Jun 10th 2010, 10:31 pm
#67
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Re: Would you 'lock' a 2 year old in their bedroom?
Tap on the hand when they were babies (well, not exactly baby in arms) worked. Smacking the kids? Mine didn't really need it. And they were far from angels (
) . The only time I slapped my lad's legs was when it was life threatening...ie, he used to walk with me all the time no problem, and when he was 3 he walked out of nursery and before I could catch my breath he had headed straight into the busy road. No cars fortunately. He got a smack for that. And he didn't do it again.
I employed the technique "take the audience away from the actor and he will cease to perform"... worked with Ed. As soon as he'd go off, we'd all head out of the room. He'd carry on until he realised that no one was there! Then he would come and join us and we'd all carry on in a nice calm manner.... I remember sitting at a table in a beefeater type pub and he decided to have a paddy over something and nothing. He was sitting at the table with us all whilst he was yelling and punching out. So we just all talked over him and had this intense pretend conversation as if he didnt exist... all turned our backs on him and just chatted away (pretending obviously) and he gave up after a few minutes.
Diversion is another good technique. Suddenly I spot something in the horizon, on the ceiling etc etc and point at it (nothing!), look intently and start asking his sister "what on earth is that?".... after a few minutes he would give up yelling and get interested. Of course I would then put together a story that "surely something was there??".... I remember being in the car and inventing this great story that "I am sure I saw a dragon in that tree" when they were hitting and kicking each other in their car seats.... it went on for ages! Stopped them killing each other!
Of course, I feel for the people who have had quite horrendously tantruming toddlers... I feel quite lucky that I got off pretty much scotfree with mine..
Em x
) . The only time I slapped my lad's legs was when it was life threatening...ie, he used to walk with me all the time no problem, and when he was 3 he walked out of nursery and before I could catch my breath he had headed straight into the busy road. No cars fortunately. He got a smack for that. And he didn't do it again.I employed the technique "take the audience away from the actor and he will cease to perform"... worked with Ed. As soon as he'd go off, we'd all head out of the room. He'd carry on until he realised that no one was there! Then he would come and join us and we'd all carry on in a nice calm manner.... I remember sitting at a table in a beefeater type pub and he decided to have a paddy over something and nothing. He was sitting at the table with us all whilst he was yelling and punching out. So we just all talked over him and had this intense pretend conversation
as if he didnt exist... all turned our backs on him and just chatted away (pretending obviously) and he gave up after a few minutes.Diversion is another good technique. Suddenly I spot something in the horizon, on the ceiling etc etc and point at it (nothing!), look intently and start asking his sister "what on earth is that?".... after a few minutes he would give up yelling and get interested. Of course I would then put together a story that "surely something was there??".... I remember being in the car and inventing this great story that "I am sure I saw a dragon in that tree" when they were hitting and kicking each other in their car seats.... it went on for ages!
Stopped them killing each other!Of course, I feel for the people who have had quite horrendously tantruming toddlers... I feel quite lucky that I got off pretty much scotfree with mine..
Em x
Ems, if something happens to my wife I hope they've cloned your sweet self in time...
As for Kporte if he doesn't make you his wife soon I'll slap him.
Have to admit, I've slapped my eldest when she has about to do something dangerous - like change the channel when the rugby is on....
Jun 10th 2010, 10:51 pm
#68
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Re: Would you 'lock' a 2 year old in their bedroom?
Ems, if something happens to my wife I hope they've cloned your sweet self in time...
As for Kporte if he doesn't make you his wife soon I'll slap him.
Have to admit, I've slapped my eldest when she has about to do something dangerous - like change the channel when the rugby is on....
As for Kporte if he doesn't make you his wife soon I'll slap him.
Have to admit, I've slapped my eldest when she has about to do something dangerous - like change the channel when the rugby is on....
Jun 10th 2010, 11:06 pm
#69
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Re: Would you 'lock' a 2 year old in their bedroom?
My memories of being smacked as a child are all about how unfair it was, not that it made me a better person.
I am proud to say I have never smacked my kids (aged 10 and 7).
They are both spirited and full of life, but they are also respectful and know right from wrong.
Discipline is important, violence isn't.
As an adult, how would you feel if someone hit you whenever you made a mistake, disagreed with someone etc.
I am proud to say I have never smacked my kids (aged 10 and 7).
They are both spirited and full of life, but they are also respectful and know right from wrong.
Discipline is important, violence isn't.
As an adult, how would you feel if someone hit you whenever you made a mistake, disagreed with someone etc.
Jun 11th 2010, 12:15 am
#70
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Re: Would you 'lock' a 2 year old in their bedroom?
ITA again and does a 2 year old have the cognitive abilities to reflect or learn in this way? Older kids maybe, that said....I think it's a bit harsh to lock a 2 year old in a room....
Unfortunately I have seen this frequently too. Children being called stupid makes me so angry. They're having all their self esteem and confidence knocked out of them and it's heartbreaking.
My friends next door neighbour calls her little girl (about 4/5) a See You Next Tuesday because she wets the bed.
How old were you when you were smacked and locked in your room? My boy is nearly 2 and I can guarantee if I locked him in his room he wouldn't "reflect" on his actions he'd cry because he's lonely, his mummy has sent him away, shut the door and he doesn't understand why.
We do time outs that last no longer than 5 minutes because little people don't have very long attention spans. If his time out was any longer he'd probably forget what he was being punished for!
Discipline is important and instilling it early is vital but 2 year olds aren't mature enough for this kind of punishment, he struggles to say his own name and sometimes calls me dad instead of mum so how's he going to understand that sometimes he needs to be locked away? Bloody cruel if you ask me.
My friends next door neighbour calls her little girl (about 4/5) a See You Next Tuesday because she wets the bed.
How old were you when you were smacked and locked in your room? My boy is nearly 2 and I can guarantee if I locked him in his room he wouldn't "reflect" on his actions he'd cry because he's lonely, his mummy has sent him away, shut the door and he doesn't understand why.
We do time outs that last no longer than 5 minutes because little people don't have very long attention spans. If his time out was any longer he'd probably forget what he was being punished for!
Discipline is important and instilling it early is vital but 2 year olds aren't mature enough for this kind of punishment, he struggles to say his own name and sometimes calls me dad instead of mum so how's he going to understand that sometimes he needs to be locked away? Bloody cruel if you ask me.
Jun 11th 2010, 1:02 am
#71
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Re: Would you 'lock' a 2 year old in their bedroom?
For something naughty but not major he gets to 2/3 minutes and for something bad he gets 5 minutes.
Jun 11th 2010, 1:31 am
#73
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Re: Would you 'lock' a 2 year old in their bedroom?
I think the moment you resort to heavy-handed tactics such as smacking you have already lost control of the situation and physical intervention is not going to change that. The only thing that is likely to happen is that the smacking turns into something less controlled and spirals into worse things.
A two year old is defintely too young in my opinion, but I am not adverse to the idea of containing the child in a room for a while if he/she is older.
As for whether there is more of a trend of smacking here than in the UK. I don't see it, if anything I would argue I saw more of it in the UK, but then I haven't been there for 8 years, so a lot might have changed since then.
A two year old is defintely too young in my opinion, but I am not adverse to the idea of containing the child in a room for a while if he/she is older.
As for whether there is more of a trend of smacking here than in the UK. I don't see it, if anything I would argue I saw more of it in the UK, but then I haven't been there for 8 years, so a lot might have changed since then.
Jun 11th 2010, 3:22 am
#74
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Re: Would you 'lock' a 2 year old in their bedroom?
I think the moment you resort to heavy-handed tactics such as smacking you have already lost control of the situation and physical intervention is not going to change that. The only thing that is likely to happen is that the smacking turns into something less controlled and spirals into worse things.
A two year old is defintely too young in my opinion, but I am not adverse to the idea of containing the child in a room for a while if he/she is older.
As for whether there is more of a trend of smacking here than in the UK. I don't see it, if anything I would argue I saw more of it in the UK, but then I haven't been there for 8 years, so a lot might have changed since then.
A two year old is defintely too young in my opinion, but I am not adverse to the idea of containing the child in a room for a while if he/she is older.
As for whether there is more of a trend of smacking here than in the UK. I don't see it, if anything I would argue I saw more of it in the UK, but then I haven't been there for 8 years, so a lot might have changed since then.
They used to have to sit half way up the stairs, no fun to be had there and they'd see others having fun either up or down but unable to join in, didn't happen often though, they were pretty good kids. Tiddler did the tamtrum on the floor in a supermarket once but I just walked away doing my shopping and she soon stopped. If they did play up I'd just threaten them with taking them to my mother's and leaving them there, good behaviour all round immediately
I smacked First Born on the arm once because she wouldn't accept no when she was trying to touch the hot oven. I decided a smack was preferable to a burn.
Jun 11th 2010, 4:03 am
#75
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