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Would you 'lock' a 2 year old in their bedroom?

Would you 'lock' a 2 year old in their bedroom?

Old Jun 10th 2010, 3:36 am
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Default Re: Would you 'lock' a 2 year old in their bedroom?

Originally Posted by Fly Away View Post
You don't need to lock them in a room. Totally ignoring a tantrum is far more effective. The current strategy of locking the child into a room isn't working because the child knows it has 100% of the mother's attention while s/he is in there because they are holding the door shut.

When mine was little I would just hum a tune and get on with what I was doing if she had a tantrum. Then when she stopped I would say something completely unrelated to the tantrum and never mention it again. She realised that I only responded to 'good' behaviour and had no tantrums after a couple of weeks of trying it on.
Yep....this is what we are doing now.

I'd never lock a child in a room, ever.
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Old Jun 10th 2010, 3:38 am
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Default Re: Would you 'lock' a 2 year old in their bedroom?

Never give a tantrum an audience...............very sound advice............
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Old Jun 10th 2010, 3:38 am
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Default Re: Would you 'lock' a 2 year old in their bedroom?

I found the best thing with tantrums in my two was to ignore them. Child has mega tantrum on the living room floor, just go and get the hoover out and hoover round them, go and do the washing up or put some washing on. Just carry on with normal stuff and pretend you can't see or hear it. They soon lose interest once they realise they get no attention. Once the tantrum has stopped, carry on as normal as though it has never happened. Children often tantrum because they want attention, and by trying to reason with them, telling them off or whatever they are getting attention and what they want. If you ignore it, it does stop. Very hard though, I was heavily pregnant with dd2 when dd1 started having them, so I understand how awful they are.

The worst tantrums, though are the ones that they have in public. Dd1 has only ever had one tantrum in public, in Sainsburys when I was heavily pregnant. I just abandoned the trolley, picked her up under my arm like a sack of spuds and went back to the car and drove home without saying a single word to her. She learned not to cross mummy like that again. Luckily, dd2 has never had one in public (although she is only two and a bit, so plenty of time) but she will be treated the same as dd1 if it happens.
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Old Jun 10th 2010, 3:40 am
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Default Re: Would you 'lock' a 2 year old in their bedroom?

No, but in times of stress I'd lock myself in there.
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Old Jun 10th 2010, 3:43 am
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Default Re: Would you 'lock' a 2 year old in their bedroom?

What is it about Sainsbury's?
Eldest (when about 2) had tantrum on the floor with OH one day. OH just carried on shopping & son stopped after a few minutes but OH didn't half get some filthy looks for his efforts from the other shoppers!
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Old Jun 10th 2010, 3:45 am
  #21  
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Default Re: Would you 'lock' a 2 year old in their bedroom?

Ignoring tantrums is definately the way to go, as I have done with all my kids. To be fair, the boys hardly ever had tantrums, they were really very well behaved.

My daughter however is a demon, and goes in for the whole lying face down kicking and screaming, but never lasts long as she gets completely ignored.
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Old Jun 10th 2010, 3:46 am
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Default Re: Would you 'lock' a 2 year old in their bedroom?

Originally Posted by Sally Simpson View Post
What is it about Sainsbury's?
Eldest (when about 2) had tantrum on the floor with OH one day. OH just carried on shopping & son stopped after a few minutes but OH didn't half get some filthy looks for his efforts from the other shoppers!


Ever see the uk advert where the mother throws the tantrum on the supermarket floor when the kids starts to throw one?
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Old Jun 10th 2010, 3:47 am
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Default Re: Would you 'lock' a 2 year old in their bedroom?

Originally Posted by scottishcelts View Post


Ever see the uk advert where the mother throws the tantrum on the supermarket floor when the kids starts to throw one?
Yes, loved that one!
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Old Jun 10th 2010, 3:58 am
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Default Re: Would you 'lock' a 2 year old in their bedroom?

Originally Posted by scottishcelts View Post


Ever see the uk advert where the mother throws the tantrum on the supermarket floor when the kids starts to throw one?

Yes
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Old Jun 10th 2010, 4:05 am
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Default Re: Would you 'lock' a 2 year old in their bedroom?

We used to ignore our 22 month old, but if the tantrum continued for any length of time we would pick him up carry him into our bedroom place him on the floor and close the door the tantrum usually continues for a few moments and he came out of his own accord once he realised there was no audience. We don't have tantrums anymore
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Old Jun 10th 2010, 4:05 am
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Default Re: Would you 'lock' a 2 year old in their bedroom?

For everyone say just ignore the tantrum, what do you propose to do when your 2 year old starts physically abusing you because you're not given him/her any attention.

Some tantrums are easy to ignore, other tantrums where children resort to physical violence are not. Sometimes there's just no other way.

Speaking from someone who has/had a very, very difficult toddler sometimes nothing (and I mean nothing) else works.

Also did anyone mention how long the kids were locked in the room? There's a difference between putting them in their room for a minute or two until they calm down and locking them in their room for hours.
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Old Jun 10th 2010, 5:43 am
  #27  
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Default Re: Would you 'lock' a 2 year old in their bedroom?

When my daughter started getting physical I would sit down on the floor and hold her tightly - not hurtfully but firmly in a complete body wrap and legs over hers so she couldn't kick. The theory is that as you hold their body against yours (as long as you stay calm) their body feels the slow steady beat of your pulse and it calms them gradually. When she calmed more I would then talk very quietly saying that once she was still, she could get up.
Still no eye contact and no talking til the end...........

Usually she had knackered herself out with the effort and realised that it was quite nice to just sit for a bit.....
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Old Jun 10th 2010, 5:53 am
  #28  
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Default Re: Would you 'lock' a 2 year old in their bedroom?

I wouldn't "lock" my (almost) 2 year old in his room because he'd be scared. The last thing I want to do is scare him like that. He has time outs in his room, the door remains open but the stair gate is shut.

I get where the woman is coming from being heavily pregnant with a toddler, I did it, I was 9 months pregnant with a 17 month old in the height of Summer, some days aren't fun. But you have to remain calm and in control.

If you shut the door on your child they could be doing anything in there, trapping their fingers in drawers, playing with the lamp that's plugged in, anything.

Another thing I used to do with my toddler when he was chucking a tantrum at home was to strap him in the highchair, that used to really piss him off and even now if he's naughty I say "Do you want to go in the chair?" and he stops, I'm buggered when he realises we don't actually have it anymore...
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Old Jun 10th 2010, 5:59 am
  #29  
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Default Re: Would you 'lock' a 2 year old in their bedroom?

Originally Posted by LouiseR View Post

If you shut the door on your child they could be doing anything in there, trapping their fingers in drawers, playing with the lamp that's plugged in, anything.
Not if you've chained them to the iron rings you've had installed in the floor.
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Old Jun 10th 2010, 6:05 am
  #30  
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Default Re: Would you 'lock' a 2 year old in their bedroom?

Originally Posted by Burbage View Post
Not if you've chained them to the iron rings you've had installed in the floor.
I'm seriously worried about you!
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