South African ventriloquist visiting Australia
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Probably heard it before, b ut so what, it's still funny :
A South African ventriloquist visiting Australia walks into a small village and sees a local sitting on his porch patting his dog. He figures he'll have little fun.
Ventriloquist: "G'day friend! Good looking dog, mind if I speak to him?"
Aussie: "The dog doesn't talk, you stupid Dutchman."
Ventriloquist: "Hello dog, how's it going?"
Dog: "Doin' all right."
Aussie: (look of extreme shock)
Ventriloquist: "Is this villager your owner?" (Pointing at the Aussie)
Dog: "Yep"
Ventriloquist: "How does he treat you?"
Dog: "Real good. He walks me twice a day, feeds me great food and takes me to the lake once a week to play."
Aussie: (look of utter disbelief)
Ventriloquist: "Mind if I talk to your horse?"
Aussie: "Uh, the horse doesn't talk either....."
Ventriloquist: "Hey horse, how's it going?"
Horse: "Cool"
Aussie: (absolutely dumbfounded)
Ventriloquist: "Is this your owner?" (Pointing at the Aussie)
Horse: "Yep"
Ventriloquist: "How does he treat you?"
Horse: "Pretty good, thanks for asking. He rides me regularly, brushes me down often and keeps me in the barn to protect me from the elements."
Aussie: (total look of amazement)
Ventriloquist: "Mind if I talk to your sheep?"
Aussie: "The sheep's a f---ing liar!
A South African ventriloquist visiting Australia walks into a small village and sees a local sitting on his porch patting his dog. He figures he'll have little fun.
Ventriloquist: "G'day friend! Good looking dog, mind if I speak to him?"
Aussie: "The dog doesn't talk, you stupid Dutchman."
Ventriloquist: "Hello dog, how's it going?"
Dog: "Doin' all right."
Aussie: (look of extreme shock)
Ventriloquist: "Is this villager your owner?" (Pointing at the Aussie)
Dog: "Yep"
Ventriloquist: "How does he treat you?"
Dog: "Real good. He walks me twice a day, feeds me great food and takes me to the lake once a week to play."
Aussie: (look of utter disbelief)
Ventriloquist: "Mind if I talk to your horse?"
Aussie: "Uh, the horse doesn't talk either....."
Ventriloquist: "Hey horse, how's it going?"
Horse: "Cool"
Aussie: (absolutely dumbfounded)
Ventriloquist: "Is this your owner?" (Pointing at the Aussie)
Horse: "Yep"
Ventriloquist: "How does he treat you?"
Horse: "Pretty good, thanks for asking. He rides me regularly, brushes me down often and keeps me in the barn to protect me from the elements."
Aussie: (total look of amazement)
Ventriloquist: "Mind if I talk to your sheep?"
Aussie: "The sheep's a f---ing liar!
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Originally Posted by furkew
Probably heard it before, b ut so what, it's still funny :
A South African ventriloquist visiting Australia walks into a small village and sees a local sitting on his porch patting his dog. He figures he'll have little fun.
Ventriloquist: "G'day friend! Good looking dog, mind if I speak to him?"
Aussie: "The dog doesn't talk, you stupid Dutchman."
Ventriloquist: "Hello dog, how's it going?"
Dog: "Doin' all right."
Aussie: (look of extreme shock)
Ventriloquist: "Is this villager your owner?" (Pointing at the Aussie)
Dog: "Yep"
Ventriloquist: "How does he treat you?"
Dog: "Real good. He walks me twice a day, feeds me great food and takes me to the lake once a week to play."
Aussie: (look of utter disbelief)
Ventriloquist: "Mind if I talk to your horse?"
Aussie: "Uh, the horse doesn't talk either....."
Ventriloquist: "Hey horse, how's it going?"
Horse: "Cool"
Aussie: (absolutely dumbfounded)
Ventriloquist: "Is this your owner?" (Pointing at the Aussie)
Horse: "Yep"
Ventriloquist: "How does he treat you?"
Horse: "Pretty good, thanks for asking. He rides me regularly, brushes me down often and keeps me in the barn to protect me from the elements."
Aussie: (total look of amazement)
Ventriloquist: "Mind if I talk to your sheep?"
Aussie: "The sheep's a f---ing liar!
A South African ventriloquist visiting Australia walks into a small village and sees a local sitting on his porch patting his dog. He figures he'll have little fun.
Ventriloquist: "G'day friend! Good looking dog, mind if I speak to him?"
Aussie: "The dog doesn't talk, you stupid Dutchman."
Ventriloquist: "Hello dog, how's it going?"
Dog: "Doin' all right."
Aussie: (look of extreme shock)
Ventriloquist: "Is this villager your owner?" (Pointing at the Aussie)
Dog: "Yep"
Ventriloquist: "How does he treat you?"
Dog: "Real good. He walks me twice a day, feeds me great food and takes me to the lake once a week to play."
Aussie: (look of utter disbelief)
Ventriloquist: "Mind if I talk to your horse?"
Aussie: "Uh, the horse doesn't talk either....."
Ventriloquist: "Hey horse, how's it going?"
Horse: "Cool"
Aussie: (absolutely dumbfounded)
Ventriloquist: "Is this your owner?" (Pointing at the Aussie)
Horse: "Yep"
Ventriloquist: "How does he treat you?"
Horse: "Pretty good, thanks for asking. He rides me regularly, brushes me down often and keeps me in the barn to protect me from the elements."
Aussie: (total look of amazement)
Ventriloquist: "Mind if I talk to your sheep?"
Aussie: "The sheep's a f---ing liar!
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