So many coming back!!
Apr 4th 2006, 1:21 pm
#76
She's a bird, you know
Joined: Jul 2003
Location: Yorkshire
Posts: 7,655
Re: So many coming back!!
Originally Posted by HiddenPaw
Ask the people whose marriages are under immense strain because of the stresses of starting a new life, or whose kids are unhappy at their new school, or whose mums are 10000 miles away and sick, whether they go to bed each night thinking "ah well, at least the sun is shining".
Australia is a wonderful place with a lot going for it, and I miss it loads. But I know that I wouldn't have been happy there, not in the long term. Just because somewhere is fun on holiday, or on a year out, doesn't mean it's the place for your future.
Life isn't all sunshine and barbies. You need to work out what is really, truly important to you before you risk losing it.
And with the sun shining down here on the edge of the Pennines, I don't think I made a bad choice
Apr 11th 2006, 4:29 am
#77
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Joined: Mar 2006
Location: Uk, Perth, now Dorset
Posts: 196
Re: So many coming back!!
[QUOTE=daisymoo]
My intentions of going to oz are too for a better life and maybe when i get there i will think the same but i will go ahead and do it. At the moment i dont feel like we have too much to give up here in the uk, no money, debts, not close to our families, hubby works 6-7 nights per week, i'm alone most of the time with my kids so we will hopefully be able to change our lives for the better but obviously if it did'nt work we would rethink.
Carol
I can only speak of my own experience of moving to Perth a year ago. Something I noticed in your post was that you said I'm alone for most of the time with my kids. I would never try to put you off coming - that has to be your decision - but I have never in my life experienced such loneliness anywhere in the world as here. And I've lived in a lot of places! I am probably older than you, and I didn't have the advantage of having younger kids at school, therefore having the chance of meeting other mums. My kid is 14 and had quite a struggle settling into his school. In hindsight, I think we should not have moved here - left it too late really. Because of the structure of Perth (miles of suburbs and no communities) it is difficult to meet people and keep in touch. If you are not worried about this, then you may settle fine - I hope that you do, but even if you don't, you will at least have tried it! And that goes for every single person who took the chance, and have decided to go back. My rose coloured specs came off after 3 months.
Originally Posted by Jim n Nic
My intentions of going to oz are too for a better life and maybe when i get there i will think the same but i will go ahead and do it. At the moment i dont feel like we have too much to give up here in the uk, no money, debts, not close to our families, hubby works 6-7 nights per week, i'm alone most of the time with my kids so we will hopefully be able to change our lives for the better but obviously if it did'nt work we would rethink.
Carol
Apr 11th 2006, 4:33 am
#78
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Location: Uk, Perth, now Dorset
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Re: So many coming back!!
Originally Posted by TraceyW
Yes you're totally right. I felt just like you. All excited about our big adventure, desperatly wanting those visas to land on the mat. But try to look at things from another perspective. You may well feel just like me, and many others, in a few years time: trapped, homesick, unsettled etc. For your sake, I hope you don't. 
Before we came I read all the bad stuff on this site, and others, I thought I was fully prepared for the hard work that was to come. Trouble is daisymoo, nobody can be prepared for just how hard this is, no matter how much ground work they do. A huge factor is emotion, and just how you will feel once you start your new life out here you cannot prepare yourself for.
Like most people, we also said "if it doesn't work out, then we will go home" reality is, it's not quite as cut and dried as that. There are many reasons stopping us returning. There's also that "what if" for going home.
I wish you well for your future here, I hope you find your dream.
Before we came I read all the bad stuff on this site, and others, I thought I was fully prepared for the hard work that was to come. Trouble is daisymoo, nobody can be prepared for just how hard this is, no matter how much ground work they do. A huge factor is emotion, and just how you will feel once you start your new life out here you cannot prepare yourself for.
Like most people, we also said "if it doesn't work out, then we will go home" reality is, it's not quite as cut and dried as that. There are many reasons stopping us returning. There's also that "what if" for going home.
I wish you well for your future here, I hope you find your dream.
Apr 11th 2006, 8:07 am
#79
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Re: So many coming back!!
[QUOTE=Beryl the Peril]
I can only speak of my own experience of moving to Perth a year ago. Something I noticed in your post was that you said I'm alone for most of the time with my kids. I would never try to put you off coming - that has to be your decision - but I have never in my life experienced such loneliness anywhere in the world as here. And I've lived in a lot of places! I am probably older than you, and I didn't have the advantage of having younger kids at school, therefore having the chance of meeting other mums. My kid is 14 and had quite a struggle settling into his school. In hindsight, I think we should not have moved here - left it too late really. Because of the structure of Perth (miles of suburbs and no communities) it is difficult to meet people and keep in touch. If you are not worried about this, then you may settle fine - I hope that you do, but even if you don't, you will at least have tried it! And that goes for every single person who took the chance, and have decided to go back. My rose coloured specs came off after 3 months.
omg that could be me in a couple of months...im moving to adelaide...
:scared:
Originally Posted by daisymoo
I can only speak of my own experience of moving to Perth a year ago. Something I noticed in your post was that you said I'm alone for most of the time with my kids. I would never try to put you off coming - that has to be your decision - but I have never in my life experienced such loneliness anywhere in the world as here. And I've lived in a lot of places! I am probably older than you, and I didn't have the advantage of having younger kids at school, therefore having the chance of meeting other mums. My kid is 14 and had quite a struggle settling into his school. In hindsight, I think we should not have moved here - left it too late really. Because of the structure of Perth (miles of suburbs and no communities) it is difficult to meet people and keep in touch. If you are not worried about this, then you may settle fine - I hope that you do, but even if you don't, you will at least have tried it! And that goes for every single person who took the chance, and have decided to go back. My rose coloured specs came off after 3 months.
:scared:
Apr 11th 2006, 8:08 am
#80
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Re: So many coming back!!
Originally Posted by lollyno1
omg that could be me in a couple of months...im moving to adelaide...
:scared:
Me too
Apr 11th 2006, 8:13 am
#81
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Re: So many coming back!!
Originally Posted by WendyC
Me too
im used to being by myself..son of 14 can be a right Kevin...lol ..Oh i hope i make some friends out there... :scared:
Apr 11th 2006, 8:15 am
#82
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Re: So many coming back!!
Originally Posted by lollyno1
im used to being by myself..son of 14 can be a right Kevin...lol ..Oh i hope i make some friends out there... :scared:
Well I have a boy aged 13, so that's your lad sorted (well if mine doesn't scare him off LOL)
and you are welcome for a girlie chat anytime, I'll get the hubby to fire up the BBQ
Apr 11th 2006, 10:28 am
#83
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Re: So many coming back!!
Originally Posted by WendyC
Well I have a boy aged 13, so that's your lad sorted (well if mine doesn't scare him off LOL)
and you are welcome for a girlie chat anytime, I'll get the hubby to fire up the BBQ
and you are welcome for a girlie chat anytime, I'll get the hubby to fire up the BBQ
than ks have emailed u
lolly
Apr 11th 2006, 10:36 am
#84
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Re: So many coming back!!
As previosly stated it is the homesickness that is the hardest. Yes, we have a beautiful house, with huge rooms,a snooker table, a spa........you name it, we got it, (not being flash or anything), but all these are material things. What I wouldnt give just to 'nip' round my sisters, or to go shopping with mum. It really is very, very hard. You can be so lonely, and it takes a long while to make good friends.
I admire anyone that goes back............THAT decision must be so hard to make!!!
I admire anyone that goes back............THAT decision must be so hard to make!!!
Apr 11th 2006, 10:44 am
#85
Joined: Jul 2005
Posts: 4,365
Re: So many coming back!!
What I wouldnt give just to 'nip' round my sisters, or to go shopping with mum. It really is very, very hard. You can be so lonely, and it takes a long while to make good friends.
I admire anyone that goes back............THAT decision must be so hard to make!!![/QUOTE]
Wouldn't we all, to nip round to my sisters i would have to fly to Houston, to see my bros its a 2 hr drive, which we do about once a year, and no way in this world would i take my 78 mad as a hatter mother to the shops
And we haven't seen any of OH family for around 7 years
I admire anyone that goes back............THAT decision must be so hard to make!!![/QUOTE]
Wouldn't we all, to nip round to my sisters i would have to fly to Houston, to see my bros its a 2 hr drive, which we do about once a year, and no way in this world would i take my 78 mad as a hatter mother to the shops
And we haven't seen any of OH family for around 7 years
Apr 11th 2006, 1:14 pm
#86
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Joined: Mar 2006
Location: Uk, Perth, now Dorset
Posts: 196
Re: So many coming back!!
[QUOTE=lollyno1]
omg that could be me in a couple of months...im moving to adelaide...
:scared:
This is by no means meant to scare anyone! You may have an entirely different experience to my own. I've just realised that I am too attached to home - I used to find moving really quite easily and was so used to it having done it most of my life. Now, in my 50's, it's a different ball game (for me anyway!). Go with a positive approach, and just remember, nothing has to be for ever if it doesn't work. If it does, fantastic, you'll know you were meant to go there! If not, it doesn't matter - at least you gave it a try. Lots of luck!
Originally Posted by Beryl the Peril
omg that could be me in a couple of months...im moving to adelaide...
:scared:
Apr 11th 2006, 2:25 pm
#87
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Location: Hot sunny Cairns !
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Re: So many coming back!!
Originally Posted by tonyk38
Folks have pretty much covered most bases on this thread already, so I thought I'd just add that my main reason for going is the stuff I know I can't experience in the UK: the wide open spaces and the natural history. Having been in Aus for a total of 6 months on two previous trips, I know that Aus' natural history can keep me happily engrossed for the rest of my life. I just wish more people would take an interest in going exploring because there's so much to see...
I just wish more people would take an interest in going exploring because there's so much to see...Hopefully going to Cairns to enjoy the heat, humidity, tropical storms, lush green rainforests and all their inhabitants.
Have wanted to live in Oz most of my life, soon to become reality. Don't have many friends here since moving 30 miles from childhood home aged 21. Live local to family but don't see them that often. It's hard but think of it as starting a new branch of the clan/family down under. It's been done before by our ancestors many times and under much tougher conditions.
Will be better off financially whatever as wife will be a nurse as opposed to housewife and my job is paying more over there then it does here.
Like badge said, you'll know if it fits/you fit it or not. It certainly seemed to on our validation trip, hopefully will when we go for good.
Andy
Apr 11th 2006, 9:58 pm
#88
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Thread Starter
Joined: May 2005
Posts: 81
Re: So many coming back!!
[QUOTE=Beryl the Peril]
I can only speak of my own experience of moving to Perth a year ago. Something I noticed in your post was that you said I'm alone for most of the time with my kids. I would never try to put you off coming - that has to be your decision - but I have never in my life experienced such loneliness anywhere in the world as here. And I've lived in a lot of places! I am probably older than you, and I didn't have the advantage of having younger kids at school, therefore having the chance of meeting other mums. My kid is 14 and had quite a struggle settling into his school. In hindsight, I think we should not have moved here - left it too late really. Because of the structure of Perth (miles of suburbs and no communities) it is difficult to meet people and keep in touch. If you are not worried about this, then you may settle fine - I hope that you do, but even if you don't, you will at least have tried it! And that goes for every single person who took the chance, and have decided to go back. My rose coloured specs came off after 3 months.
So sorry you feel lonely, the reason i'm alone most of the time is because husband works nights as a taxi driver and cant afford to make the change of career as this would mean a month or whatever with no wages as we are paid daily. If we go to oz it would mean the sale of the house and a whole fresh start careerwise for both of us. You may well ask why dont we do it here but we've tried without success a few times, as for making friends our closest friends have just made the move so we would go and join them, also all of my little family are very good at making friends and i can talk the hind legs off a donkey as you may have noticed. If it didn't work in perth or we didn't like it then oz is such a huge place we would look at moving somewhere else, the gold coast looks good.
carol
Originally Posted by daisymoo
I can only speak of my own experience of moving to Perth a year ago. Something I noticed in your post was that you said I'm alone for most of the time with my kids. I would never try to put you off coming - that has to be your decision - but I have never in my life experienced such loneliness anywhere in the world as here. And I've lived in a lot of places! I am probably older than you, and I didn't have the advantage of having younger kids at school, therefore having the chance of meeting other mums. My kid is 14 and had quite a struggle settling into his school. In hindsight, I think we should not have moved here - left it too late really. Because of the structure of Perth (miles of suburbs and no communities) it is difficult to meet people and keep in touch. If you are not worried about this, then you may settle fine - I hope that you do, but even if you don't, you will at least have tried it! And that goes for every single person who took the chance, and have decided to go back. My rose coloured specs came off after 3 months.
carol
Apr 11th 2006, 11:02 pm
#89
Forum Regular
Joined: Aug 2005
Posts: 208
Re: So many coming back!!
Originally Posted by Margaret2
What I wouldnt give just to 'nip' round my sisters, or to go shopping with mum. It really is very, very hard. You can be so lonely, and it takes a long while to make good friends.
I admire anyone that goes back............THAT decision must be so hard to make!!!
I admire anyone that goes back............THAT decision must be so hard to make!!!
Wouldn't we all, to nip round to my sisters i would have to fly to Houston, to see my bros its a 2 hr drive, which we do about once a year, and no way in this world would i take my 78 mad as a hatter mother to the shops
And we haven't seen any of OH family for around 7 years
[/QUOTE]I would love to be able to nip round to see my sister to.
Apr 11th 2006, 11:10 pm
#90
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Joined: Mar 2006
Location: Uk, Perth, now Dorset
Posts: 196
Re: So many coming back!!
[QUOTE=daisymoo]
So sorry you feel lonely, the reason i'm alone most of the time is because husband works nights as a taxi driver and cant afford to make the change of career as this would mean a month or whatever with no wages as we are paid daily. If we go to oz it would mean the sale of the house and a whole fresh start careerwise for both of us. You may well ask why dont we do it here but we've tried without success a few times, as for making friends our closest friends have just made the move so we would go and join them, also all of my little family are very good at making friends and i can talk the hind legs off a donkey as you may have noticed. If it didn't work in perth or we didn't like it then oz is such a huge place we would look at moving somewhere else, the gold coast looks good.
carol
Thanks Carol. It will hopefully work out fine for you. There's a lot of truth in the fact that you really cannot discover how somewhere is going to suit you or how you will feel about it until you are 'in it'. I think the people who make a real success of living out here are those who have very little to leave behind. Then there really isn't much to miss. The majority of people who end up going back are those who have close and valued friends and family back in the UK, such as we do! That said, Perth would now be my last choice of places to live in Oz, but I didn't know that when I came. It suits some people fine, particularly those who are happy to be very self-contained, but this is not for me at all! The best of luck, and follow your dream.
Originally Posted by Beryl the Peril
So sorry you feel lonely, the reason i'm alone most of the time is because husband works nights as a taxi driver and cant afford to make the change of career as this would mean a month or whatever with no wages as we are paid daily. If we go to oz it would mean the sale of the house and a whole fresh start careerwise for both of us. You may well ask why dont we do it here but we've tried without success a few times, as for making friends our closest friends have just made the move so we would go and join them, also all of my little family are very good at making friends and i can talk the hind legs off a donkey as you may have noticed. If it didn't work in perth or we didn't like it then oz is such a huge place we would look at moving somewhere else, the gold coast looks good.
carol