bingobob777

I got the belt and the slipper from about the age of 6 or 7, it never worked, not once when I was about to do something I wasn't supposed to did I stop and think uh oh I better not in case I get caught.

Withholding stuff over a few days is a much better punishment.

fraser

Surely there is no rule for this. As surely different children react differently to different punishment. It's all very well someone saying "I never smacked mine and it works fine" and good for them. This doesn't mean that if they tried it with different children it would gain the same response. Each parent has to do what is needed to bring their children up in the correct way. Some children are a lot easier to handle than others.

scottishcelts

agreed. Works a treat with my kids.

koalakim

My Mum used to give me a slap on the wrist or back of the legs if I was about to do something stupid, when you are about to stick your hand in the fire there isn't time to explain why you shouldn't put your hand in the fire!

She said that I didn't respond to slaps as a telling off, I would stand there defiantly but if they shouted at me I would be reduced to tears, still works even now!

Other tactics employed by my Dad for discipline was to threaten to not let me watch Top of The Pops, now that really worked!

I haven't got kids so don't have to worry about all that but I suspect they'd be pretty deaf from OH shouting at them every time they didn't something wrong. He's not very tolerant so probably best we never had any!

The cats, well, telling them off falls on deaf ears, water pistols work (try that on your kids?) and remarkably hissing at them as well.

moneypenny20

Absolutely. It also depends on the 'crime' A slap on the hand after a child insists on repeatedly trying to touch a hot oven works. A slap on the hand after the child has thumped its sibling doesn't. As for the slap around the head, that's not 'smacking children' that's brutality pure and simple.

DibDob

Imho I believe its assault and should be punished by law i am disgusted by the acceptance of assaulting a child never mind how gentle one does such a thing

rasen78

Works with the boy, NOT with the lass

I always follow through with threats, so they know if I say they won't get xyz or go to a party, they won't. The boy was stopped from going to one party. Not had to do it since. The lass? Sigh.... She has not gone on more than one occasion

Two kids both brought up in the same way, but who react completely differently

scottishcelts

I was never smacked, not ever, and I turned out just fine - never been in any trouble and pretty much done what I was told.

My Dad's authoritative voice was always enough. My hubby is the same, one raised voice from him and the kids know.

Japonica

We had the same teacher! He also threw chalk. And slammed the meter stick down on the desk to get everyone's attention. By the end of the year, it was in about five pieces.

We also had corporal punishment in the principal's office. The dreaded strap. This was Canada in the 1970s/80s.

That's when I have used it without second thought. Once when she was about to put her hand on the burner on the stove. Once again when she got away from me and ran into traffic while I was holding her baby brother. She could have easily been hit by an oncoming car. I wanted her to remember that she never does that again. And later we talked about it, as much as you can discuss it with a 3 year-old.

Both hubby and I were smacked by our respective families. I don't see it as psychologically scarring us for life. My mother's sharp critical tongue was a lot worse, IMO, than anytime she used physical punishment. I encountered the occasional smack with the wooden spoon enough to know that I didn't want it again, so in that sense it served as a useful deterrent in my case. But it obviously stopped being used once we reached a certain age and it was all grounding and removal of the niceties in life. With my own kids, I find that loss of privileges works fine. A couple of days without the Nintendo and they're begging for mercy.

Kapri

My memories of being smacked as a child are very negative. I still resent it now!

I have never smacked mine. I encourage good behaviour with rewards and praise, and if they are naughty they get sanctions - loss of privileges etc.

I wouldn't smack a work colleague if they messed up, why would I smack a child?

For people who say that we're too soft on kids now: it's not kids who receive positive discipline that end up going completely off the rails. It tends to be either kids who get no discipline, inconsistent discipline or kids that get belted by their parents.
Violence breeds violence.

I have been known to lose my temper and shout though

northernbird

Christ only knows what I did wrong then

Kelli28

A PE teacher at my school was checking we were wearing correct uniform in particular those ugly gym knickers that were wore under gym skirts.

I told her I didn't have mine on, so she asked to look to check I didn't have them on I had to repeat I wasn't wearing them under my skirt and no way was she going to be checking about four times before she threatened to send me to the head, I agreed to go to the head, she soon changed her mind about her desire to look up my skirt!!

And no I never smack my son apart from maybe a tap on the hand when he was a toddler and he's far better behaved than kids who i know have been smacked

Kelli28

I think you're trolling but I'll play along anyway.

I also think you are confused by the diffence between abuse and disaplian!

Kapri

You did nothing wrong C. I was really talking about kids that end up in jail because they are violent themselves or who engage in major anti social behaviour.

I'm not talking about teenage rebellion. I was a nightmare teen - smoking drinking, mixing with the bad boys, etc and I turned out ok in the end.


Have faith xx

CEM

My maths teacher used to do that. Unfortunately for me the boy it was usually aimed at sat right behind me! It used to whistle past my right ear almost every lesson until one day Oliver had obviously had enough. We turned round to see see him jumping out of the window.... we were on the first floor!
It started a craze for the boys jumping out of windows and off the roof