British Expats
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British Expats (https://britishexpats.com/forum/)
-   The Barbie (https://britishexpats.com/forum/barbie-92/)
-   -   Rolf Harris (https://britishexpats.com/forum/barbie-92/rolf-harris-837682/)

knockoff nige Jul 3rd 2014 5:14 pm
Re: Rolf Harris
 
Originally Posted by stevenglish1 (Post 11324584)
I never actually said they did cover up, only that they were equally responsible for any abuse that happened after they knew, which I stand by. If an adult has the power to stop or prevent abuse then they have an obligation to do so
But how could they be equally responsible? And I can't see it being an easy option to dob family in on suspicion of these crimes. Especially when it's someone so widely trusted in the entertainment industry. If the victims can't bring themselves to do it, you can't expect family of the perpetrator to do it either.

I think you're still speaking through your anger on this.

scrubbedexpat098 Jul 3rd 2014 5:21 pm
Re: Rolf Harris
 
Rolf Harris’s wife Alwen Hughes joins unenviable wives club | News.com.au

It would seem that she's standing by him even after the verdict, as is Robert Hughes's wife, that's indefesible.

Geordie George Jul 3rd 2014 5:21 pm
Re: Rolf Harris
 
Originally Posted by stevenglish1 (Post 11324584)
I never actually said they did cover up, only that they were equally responsible for any abuse that happened after they knew, which I stand by. If an adult has the power to stop or prevent abuse then they have an obligation to do so
I've not been following it, so don't know - when did his family find out about the abuse? I remember reading about a letter written to the family of one of the women, but that was many, many years later.

There are all sorts of strange dynamics at play - power, relationships. It's way too simplistic to say that a family member is as much to blame as the abuser. Choosing to believe your husband/father, however misguided or naïve, is not the same as sexually abusing someone. He alone was responsible for his actions, not his family.

scrubbedexpat098 Jul 3rd 2014 5:40 pm
Re: Rolf Harris
 
Originally Posted by knockoff nige (Post 11324587)
But how could they be equally responsible? And I can't see it being an easy option to dob family in on suspicion of these crimes. Especially when it's someone so widely trusted in the entertainment industry. If the victims can't bring themselves to do it, you can't expect family of the perpetrator to do it either.

I think you're still speaking through your anger on this.
You may well be right, but we should all be seething about this, if my wife caught me abusing a 13 year old girl, she'd go straight to the police and quite rightly so, there are some things you just don't defend. One thing bonds all these abusers, they've all had some sort of support network, ranging from supplying them with children to turning a blind eye. They wouldn't be able to carry on without it. The enablers bear an equal responsibility in my view.

knockoff nige Jul 3rd 2014 5:43 pm
Re: Rolf Harris
 
Originally Posted by stevenglish1 (Post 11324599)
You may well be right, but we should all be seething about this, if my wife caught me abusing a 13 year old girl, she'd go straight to the police and quite rightly so, there are some things you just don't defend. One thing bonds all these abusers, they've all had some sort of support network, ranging from supplying them with children to turning a blind eye. They wouldn't be able to carry on without it. The enablers bear an equal responsibility in my view.
She'd go straight to the police? I doubt that. She'd confront you first I would think. That would give you an opportunity to convince her otherwise. His wife standing by him after this verdict tells me she needs counselling, not a conviction of her own.

Sally Redux Jul 3rd 2014 5:46 pm
Re: Rolf Harris
 
Originally Posted by Geordie George (Post 11324590)
I've not been following it, so don't know - when did his family find out about the abuse? I remember reading about a letter written to the family of one of the women, but that was many, many years later.

There are all sorts of strange dynamics at play - power, relationships. It's way too simplistic to say that a family member is as much to blame as the abuser. Choosing to believe your husband/father, however misguided or naïve, is not the same as sexually abusing someone. He alone was responsible for his actions, not his family.
I don't know either. These guys are very good at manipulating people so I don't think it's straightforward to condemn the families.

scrubbedexpat098 Jul 3rd 2014 5:51 pm
Re: Rolf Harris
 
Originally Posted by knockoff nige (Post 11324601)
She'd go straight to the police? I doubt that. She'd confront you first I would think. That would give you an opportunity to convince her otherwise. His wife standing by him after this verdict tells me she needs counselling, not a conviction of her own.
We clearly have differing views on this, but it runs deeper than just the person guilty of the act itself surely. I tell you now, my wife WOULD go to the police, her every instinct would be telling her it might be her own kids next, or may have already been victims.

scrubbedexpat098 Jul 3rd 2014 5:53 pm
Re: Rolf Harris
 
Originally Posted by Sally Redux (Post 11324602)
I don't know either. These guys are very good at manipulating people so I don't think it's straightforward to condemn the families.
What sort of adult gets manipulated into covering for or standing by paedophile? I honestly don't get it

knockoff nige Jul 3rd 2014 5:56 pm
Re: Rolf Harris
 
Originally Posted by stevenglish1 (Post 11324607)
We clearly have differing views on this, but it runs deeper than just the person guilty of the act itself surely. I tell you now, my wife WOULD go to the police, her every instinct would be telling her it might be her own kids next, or may have already been victims.
But that would suggest that his wife is totally ok with paedophilia. Surely you're not suggesting that?

scrubbedexpat098 Jul 3rd 2014 6:02 pm
Re: Rolf Harris
 
Originally Posted by knockoff nige (Post 11324611)
But that would suggest that his wife is totally ok with paedophilia. Surely you're not suggesting that?
If she was letting it happen and not doing anything about it, that would be a logical conclusion surely, if not totally then partially at the very least. Where I work there's a slogan, 'the standard you walk past is the standard you accept'

knockoff nige Jul 3rd 2014 6:07 pm
Re: Rolf Harris
 
Originally Posted by stevenglish1 (Post 11324617)
If she was letting it happen and not doing anything about it, that would be a logical conclusion surely, if not totally then partially at the very least. Where I work there's a slogan, 'the standard you walk past is the standard you accept'
I think you're being very hard on her. You know this guy through TV. She's spent most of her life with him. It can't be easy to give that up. As I said, I think she needs counselling as her world must be in pieces.

Geordie George Jul 3rd 2014 6:15 pm
Re: Rolf Harris
 
Originally Posted by Sally Redux (Post 11324602)
I don't know either. These guys are very good at manipulating people so I don't think it's straightforward to condemn the families.
Exactly. Their whole modus operandi depends on them being very good at lying to and manipulating people. To think that he wouldn't have done that to his own family, too, is kinda ridiculous. And they've had years and years of that. You don't overcome that kind of psychological and emotional manipulation (abuse, call it what you will) overnight. Possibly evidenced by reports that his wife is standing by him.

Sally Redux Jul 3rd 2014 6:17 pm
Re: Rolf Harris
 
Originally Posted by stevenglish1 (Post 11324607)
We clearly have differing views on this, but it runs deeper than just the person guilty of the act itself surely. I tell you now, my wife WOULD go to the police, her every instinct would be telling her it might be her own kids next, or may have already been victims.
Maybe your wife would go to the police because you're not a paedophile, if that makes sense? ie you haven't built up the webs of power that they do.

We really don't know the whole story here regarding the family.

scrubbedexpat098 Jul 3rd 2014 6:20 pm
Re: Rolf Harris
 
Originally Posted by knockoff nige (Post 11324618)
I think you're being very hard on her. You know this guy through TV. She's spent most of her life with him. It can't be easy to give that up. As I said, I think she needs counselling as her world must be in pieces.
It may well be in pieces because she's racked with guilt for not saying anything previously, if that's the case then serves her right. I'm sorry if you feel you're banging your head against a brick wall, but I can't see me changing my mind. The whole thing just makes my blood boil, I can't help it

Sally Redux Jul 3rd 2014 6:29 pm
Re: Rolf Harris
 
Originally Posted by stevenglish1 (Post 11324624)
It may well be in pieces because she's racked with guilt for not saying anything previously, if that's the case then serves her right. I'm sorry if you feel you're banging your head against a brick wall, but I can't see me changing my mind. The whole thing just makes my blood boil, I can't help it
It's all rather unpleasant but is being dealt with through legal channels. Boiling your blood isn't going to achieve anything.


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