Need "personal" advice
#1
Need "personal" advice
I have a bit of a problem!
As some of you are aware i work away from home and called the wife last night who was VERY upset. Turns out she had gone through the computer and discovered i have looked at some "naughty" sites.
I think most guys do / have, but havent a clue what to say to her. Its not easy being stuck here talking over the phone.
Help please
As some of you are aware i work away from home and called the wife last night who was VERY upset. Turns out she had gone through the computer and discovered i have looked at some "naughty" sites.
I think most guys do / have, but havent a clue what to say to her. Its not easy being stuck here talking over the phone.
Help please
#2
Re: Need "personal" advice
I have a bit of a problem!
As some of you are aware i work away from home and called the wife last night who was VERY upset. Turns out she had gone through the computer and discovered i have looked at some "naughty" sites.
I think most guys do / have, but havent a clue what to say to her. Its not easy being stuck here talking over the phone.
Help please
As some of you are aware i work away from home and called the wife last night who was VERY upset. Turns out she had gone through the computer and discovered i have looked at some "naughty" sites.
I think most guys do / have, but havent a clue what to say to her. Its not easy being stuck here talking over the phone.
Help please
Are we talking websites with videos of kids not listening to their parents and grown-ups running with scissors?
Last edited by Broad Shoulders; Apr 24th 2010 at 6:15 am.
#3
Re: Need "personal" advice
I have a bit of a problem!
As some of you are aware i work away from home and called the wife last night who was VERY upset. Turns out she had gone through the computer and discovered i have looked at some "naughty" sites.
I think most guys do / have, but havent a clue what to say to her. Its not easy being stuck here talking over the phone.
Help please
As some of you are aware i work away from home and called the wife last night who was VERY upset. Turns out she had gone through the computer and discovered i have looked at some "naughty" sites.
I think most guys do / have, but havent a clue what to say to her. Its not easy being stuck here talking over the phone.
Help please
#6
Re: Need "personal" advice
I have a bit of a problem!
As some of you are aware i work away from home and called the wife last night who was VERY upset. Turns out she had gone through the computer and discovered i have looked at some "naughty" sites.
I think most guys do / have, but havent a clue what to say to her. Its not easy being stuck here talking over the phone.
Help please
As some of you are aware i work away from home and called the wife last night who was VERY upset. Turns out she had gone through the computer and discovered i have looked at some "naughty" sites.
I think most guys do / have, but havent a clue what to say to her. Its not easy being stuck here talking over the phone.
Help please
#8
Re: Need "personal" advice
I have a bit of a problem!
As some of you are aware i work away from home and called the wife last night who was VERY upset. Turns out she had gone through the computer and discovered i have looked at some "naughty" sites.
I think most guys do / have, but havent a clue what to say to her. Its not easy being stuck here talking over the phone.
Help please
As some of you are aware i work away from home and called the wife last night who was VERY upset. Turns out she had gone through the computer and discovered i have looked at some "naughty" sites.
I think most guys do / have, but havent a clue what to say to her. Its not easy being stuck here talking over the phone.
Help please
Any guy who says he hasn't been there is a liar.
#9
Auntie Fa
Joined: Nov 2006
Location: Seattle
Posts: 7,344
Re: Need "personal" advice
In addition to Dorothy's very sage advice, I'd recommend to your wife not to go looking for such things if she's not going to like what she finds.
I'd also recommend you set up separate user accounts on the computer, and respect each other's privacy.
I rarely even look at my husband's Facebook page. One friend of mine got upset because an old flame posted something on her husband's page (way outside of his control), another because a man she was vaguely seeing didn't add her as a friend but had her friend as a friend. Good grief, grow up.
Technology means we live our lives in public - that's not always a good thing.
I'd also recommend you set up separate user accounts on the computer, and respect each other's privacy.
I rarely even look at my husband's Facebook page. One friend of mine got upset because an old flame posted something on her husband's page (way outside of his control), another because a man she was vaguely seeing didn't add her as a friend but had her friend as a friend. Good grief, grow up.
Technology means we live our lives in public - that's not always a good thing.
#10
BE Forum Addict
Joined: Jul 2007
Location: Brisbane
Posts: 2,949
Re: Need "personal" advice
But to the OP, what is that's upset her? The actual act of you being turned on by other women which would probably point to low self esteem in which case you should reassure her that you still find her attractive.
Or is it the secrecy that you're "sneaking" in some "you" time when she's not around and to that one, simple, ask her to join in!!
Good luck, there won't be any right answer, us women are strange complex creatures
#11
Re: Need "personal" advice
I've never understood why some women get so upset by their fella watching porn
Ask if she wants to watch it with you mate
Ask if she wants to watch it with you mate
#13
Forum Regular
Joined: Apr 2010
Posts: 167
Re: Need "personal" advice
Be honest..
Men are born wankers, it has nothing to do with how you feel about her.
You need to explain that it is just a kind of release and is nothing emotional. Just because you have been looking at these sites does not mean that you are shagging about. Sex for women is more of an emotional thing and involves a lot more mental work than it does for a bloke. Having a wank for you lot is the equivelent of a bloody good day shoe shopping or a decent argument and cry for women and a hell of a lot less expensive.
It does not reflect on how you feel about her and does not mean that she isnt enough for you. It's just that you are playing with a toy that no-one can take off you. Does she she know of ANY BOY or man that isnt playing, pulling or scratching it, even they are not realising they are?
It's just one of those things that every bloke does but not think about how it will affect the other half.
Give her a couple of days to think that through and she'll be fine.
Men are born wankers, it has nothing to do with how you feel about her.
You need to explain that it is just a kind of release and is nothing emotional. Just because you have been looking at these sites does not mean that you are shagging about. Sex for women is more of an emotional thing and involves a lot more mental work than it does for a bloke. Having a wank for you lot is the equivelent of a bloody good day shoe shopping or a decent argument and cry for women and a hell of a lot less expensive.
It does not reflect on how you feel about her and does not mean that she isnt enough for you. It's just that you are playing with a toy that no-one can take off you. Does she she know of ANY BOY or man that isnt playing, pulling or scratching it, even they are not realising they are?
It's just one of those things that every bloke does but not think about how it will affect the other half.
Give her a couple of days to think that through and she'll be fine.
#14
Joined: Sep 2005
Posts: 23,400
Re: Need "personal" advice
I have a bit of a problem!
As some of you are aware i work away from home and called the wife last night who was VERY upset. Turns out she had gone through the computer and discovered i have looked at some "naughty" sites.
I think most guys do / have, but havent a clue what to say to her. Its not easy being stuck here talking over the phone.
Help please
As some of you are aware i work away from home and called the wife last night who was VERY upset. Turns out she had gone through the computer and discovered i have looked at some "naughty" sites.
I think most guys do / have, but havent a clue what to say to her. Its not easy being stuck here talking over the phone.
Help please
I think honesty is the key here though, I tell him about it 'Oh I saw this good/naff/odd porn clib on the site today' and then I moan that I keep getting computer viruses from it, then he tells me to not go on there so often as he is fed up with me moaning about viruses and so it begins again!
The only thing you have now is to be honest, and say that you didnt mean to hide it from her, its a bloke thing and it doesnt mean anything but what will have upset her is the face you hid it from her.
So talk to her, explain and hope she gets the message.
#15
Re: Need "personal" advice
I agree with others - you need to find out exactly what it is that is bothering her. what is it about the porn that she doesn't like?
Does she feel rejected?
Does she think you don't fancy her?
Does she have a strong moral objection to porn?
Is she missing you?
A bit of reassurance that you love her and find her attractive will probably be the way to go.
Does she feel rejected?
Does she think you don't fancy her?
Does she have a strong moral objection to porn?
Is she missing you?
A bit of reassurance that you love her and find her attractive will probably be the way to go.