Most embarassing
Jan 5th 2006, 2:49 pm
#31
Lost in BE Cyberspace
Thread Starter
Joined: Nov 2005
Location: at the bottom of a wine glass
Posts: 28,176
Re: Most embarassing
Originally Posted by tiredwithtwins
many years ago, having done a spot of retail therapy and loaded down with carrier bags, i was walking to the bus stop when i noticed 2 gorgeous long-haired blokes across the road from me. i watched them walk down the road, not seeing a row of concrete bollards in front of me - as i was too busy ogling these guys i walked straight into one of the bollards and went flying!
K for that.
Wendy
Jan 6th 2006, 4:46 am
#32
BE Forum Addict
Joined: Apr 2002
Location: brisbane
Posts: 1,020
Re: Most embarassing
I was walking back from the beach in the Dominican Republic,had put my shorts on over my bikini, but couldnt be bothered to do them up properly.Everyone was staring at me and im like bloody hell i wear less on the beach,but when i looked down my bikini bottoms had come down and my minge was poking out.!!!
donna
donna
Jan 6th 2006, 5:01 am
#33
Lost in BE Cyberspace
Joined: Feb 2005
Posts: 15,526
Re: Most embarassing
I can remember my last embarassing moment, not quiet sure if it is my Most. On my recent trip to England, Relies had arranged a get together, so I'm tanked up, family in tow and everywhere around me. In walks my female youngest cousin that I hadn't seen in about 16 years, I rush over grabs her gives her a big kiss and affecionate cuddle. Turns out it's the 19 year old babysitter of one of my cousins who is hosting the party. Now in front of about 30 relies that took some explaining, particuarly to the wife, as my youngest cousin is now 35.
Jan 6th 2006, 5:56 am
#34
Australia's Doorman
Joined: Jan 2005
Location: The Shoalhaven, New South Wales, Australia
Posts: 11,056
Re: Most embarassing
Hmmm ... where to begin... I have many moments... ones that spring to mind:
Aged about 11 - chatting up a couple of very tasty girls down at the local open air swimming pool one hot summer's afternoon. All's going well, telling 'em a great joke, they start laughing, I laugh too - huge ****ing ball of yellow snot inflates out of my right nostril like a mucus beach ball - girls run off screaming in disgust - I pick up my towel and trudge back to my mates who have nearly passed out with laughter.
Aged 15 - got a date with a local hottie. We have a nice walk around the local common holding hands, sip a bit of Merrydown, then I walk her back to her house. On the doorstep I decide it's my big moment - go to kiss her french stylee - she keeps her mouth mainly shut - I lick her front teeth with my tongue. She goes "urrgggh - you just licked my teeth" and runs into the house. Tells everyone at school the next day and turns me into a laughing stock.
Aged about 17 - playing that round robin game of table tennis where about 20 of your circle the table taking a hit in turn. I get knocked out early on - decide to liven things up a bit. Charge up to table screaming "PITCH INVASION" - jump on it - whole thing closes up around like me like some sodding great sandwich. Several hundred six formers piss themselves laughing - especially when I emerge slightly concussed.
Aged about 19 - been down the pub with my mates - consume many beers. We all head back to my mate's girlfriend's place with about 10 other people. Someone puts a bit of music on and a joint gets passed around. My mate Andrew, as worse for wear as me, lifts his arse and lets loose a mighty fart. Much laughter. I can feel stirrings myself, so I rock back in my chair say "that's nothing!" - push out a fart and follow through with a plop of viscous properties. Sharon McCauseland goes "Urghh - he's ****ing shat himself" - I limp off to the bathroom - realise there's little I can do and sneak off home, enduring a two mile walk before I can clean myself up.
Aged about 11 - chatting up a couple of very tasty girls down at the local open air swimming pool one hot summer's afternoon. All's going well, telling 'em a great joke, they start laughing, I laugh too - huge ****ing ball of yellow snot inflates out of my right nostril like a mucus beach ball - girls run off screaming in disgust - I pick up my towel and trudge back to my mates who have nearly passed out with laughter.
Aged 15 - got a date with a local hottie. We have a nice walk around the local common holding hands, sip a bit of Merrydown, then I walk her back to her house. On the doorstep I decide it's my big moment - go to kiss her french stylee - she keeps her mouth mainly shut - I lick her front teeth with my tongue. She goes "urrgggh - you just licked my teeth" and runs into the house. Tells everyone at school the next day and turns me into a laughing stock.
Aged about 17 - playing that round robin game of table tennis where about 20 of your circle the table taking a hit in turn. I get knocked out early on - decide to liven things up a bit. Charge up to table screaming "PITCH INVASION" - jump on it - whole thing closes up around like me like some sodding great sandwich. Several hundred six formers piss themselves laughing - especially when I emerge slightly concussed.
Aged about 19 - been down the pub with my mates - consume many beers. We all head back to my mate's girlfriend's place with about 10 other people. Someone puts a bit of music on and a joint gets passed around. My mate Andrew, as worse for wear as me, lifts his arse and lets loose a mighty fart. Much laughter. I can feel stirrings myself, so I rock back in my chair say "that's nothing!" - push out a fart and follow through with a plop of viscous properties. Sharon McCauseland goes "Urghh - he's ****ing shat himself" - I limp off to the bathroom - realise there's little I can do and sneak off home, enduring a two mile walk before I can clean myself up.
Jan 6th 2006, 6:02 am
#35
Joined: Jan 2006
Posts: 3,376
Re: Most embarassing
Originally Posted by Hutch
Hmmm ... where to begin... I have many moments... ones that spring to mind:
Aged about 11 - chatting up a couple of very tasty girls down at the local open air swimming pool one hot summer's afternoon. All's going well, telling 'em a great joke, they start laughing, I laugh too - huge ****ing ball of yellow snot inflates out of my right nostril like a mucus beach ball - girls run off screaming in disgust - I pick up my towel and trudge back to my mates who have nearly passed out with laughter.
Aged 15 - got a date with a local hottie. We have a nice walk around the local common holding hands, sip a bit of Merrydown, then I walk her back to her house. On the doorstep I decide it's my big moment - go to kiss her french stylee - she keeps her mouth mainly shut - I lick her front teeth with my tongue. She goes "urrgggh - you just licked my teeth" and runs into the house. Tells everyone at school the next day and turns me into a laughing stock.
Aged about 17 - playing that round robin game of table tennis where about 20 of your circle the table taking a hit in turn. I get knocked out early on - decide to liven things up a bit. Charge up to table screaming "PITCH INVASION" - jump on it - whole thing closes up around like me like some sodding great sandwich. Several hundred six formers piss themselves laughing - especially when I emerge slightly concussed.
Aged about 19 - been down the pub with my mates - consume many beers. We all head back to my mate's girlfriend's place with about 10 other people. Someone puts a bit of music on and a joint gets passed around. My mate Andrew, as worse for wear as me, lifts his arse and lets loose a mighty fart. Much laughter. I can feel stirrings myself, so I rock back in my chair say "that's nothing!" - push out a fart and follow through with a plop of viscous properties. Sharon McCauseland goes "Urghh - he's ****ing shat himself" - I limp off to the bathroom - realise there's little I can do and sneak off home, enduring a two mile walk before I can clean myself up.
Aged about 11 - chatting up a couple of very tasty girls down at the local open air swimming pool one hot summer's afternoon. All's going well, telling 'em a great joke, they start laughing, I laugh too - huge ****ing ball of yellow snot inflates out of my right nostril like a mucus beach ball - girls run off screaming in disgust - I pick up my towel and trudge back to my mates who have nearly passed out with laughter.
Aged 15 - got a date with a local hottie. We have a nice walk around the local common holding hands, sip a bit of Merrydown, then I walk her back to her house. On the doorstep I decide it's my big moment - go to kiss her french stylee - she keeps her mouth mainly shut - I lick her front teeth with my tongue. She goes "urrgggh - you just licked my teeth" and runs into the house. Tells everyone at school the next day and turns me into a laughing stock.
Aged about 17 - playing that round robin game of table tennis where about 20 of your circle the table taking a hit in turn. I get knocked out early on - decide to liven things up a bit. Charge up to table screaming "PITCH INVASION" - jump on it - whole thing closes up around like me like some sodding great sandwich. Several hundred six formers piss themselves laughing - especially when I emerge slightly concussed.
Aged about 19 - been down the pub with my mates - consume many beers. We all head back to my mate's girlfriend's place with about 10 other people. Someone puts a bit of music on and a joint gets passed around. My mate Andrew, as worse for wear as me, lifts his arse and lets loose a mighty fart. Much laughter. I can feel stirrings myself, so I rock back in my chair say "that's nothing!" - push out a fart and follow through with a plop of viscous properties. Sharon McCauseland goes "Urghh - he's ****ing shat himself" - I limp off to the bathroom - realise there's little I can do and sneak off home, enduring a two mile walk before I can clean myself up.
YOU, my friend....are a clas f#####g act!!
Quick lock him up - he's unsafe!!
Jan 6th 2006, 6:11 am
#36
Joined: Jan 2005
Posts: 975
Re: Most embarassing
Originally Posted by Linda Lushardi
Took my kids to a childrens birthday party down our street where the mother had erected a bouncy castle in the garden. The adults spent all afternoon drinking copious amounts of wine (me included) It was decided that the adults should have a go on the bouncy castle.
I couldnt wait to get on and was bouncing away having a real good time, when all of a sudden my heel got caught in the bottom of my tracksuit pants. On the next downward bounce my tracksuit slid around my ankles taking my knickers with it!! :scared:
The echos of loud raucous laughter still ring in my ears. And to make matters even worse, some bloke had the video camera rolling 
I couldnt wait to get on and was bouncing away having a real good time, when all of a sudden my heel got caught in the bottom of my tracksuit pants. On the next downward bounce my tracksuit slid around my ankles taking my knickers with it!! :scared:
The echos of loud raucous laughter still ring in my ears. And to make matters even worse, some bloke had the video camera rolling
Jan 6th 2006, 7:34 am
#37
Lost in BE Cyberspace
Thread Starter
Joined: Nov 2005
Location: at the bottom of a wine glass
Posts: 28,176
Re: Most embarassing
K sent to all who posted their stories.
Keep it up guys
Wendy x
Keep it up guys
Wendy x
Jan 6th 2006, 7:57 am
#38
NorthLakes, Brissy
Joined: Sep 2004
Location: Bridgehaven release - North Lakes!
Posts: 2,423
Re: Most embarassing
Originally Posted by WendyC
K sent to all who posted their stories.
Keep it up guys
Wendy x
Keep it up guys
Wendy x
Living in Cuba (Spanish speaking) i was tee total - and had a thing for pinapple juice - not speaking particulary good Spanish - i ask for Jugo de pene (not sure how its spelt) the women serving me stares at me - so i try again (speaking louder and slower - well i am English and we all know that if you speak louder and slower Jonny Foreigner understands you
) anyway after a few more minutes i realise what i had been saying roughtly translated - means 'Juice of a dick' - what i should have been saying was Jugo de Pina.Oops
Last edited by wargod; Jan 6th 2006 at 8:06 am.
Jan 6th 2006, 9:52 am
#39
G'day Sport
Joined: Jul 2005
Location: Manchester England, Soon to be Melbourne Vic
Posts: 185
Re: Most embarassing
Well Mine was in that wonderfull eatery McDonalds just as they tried to go all healthy with salads and bags of fruit.
I was in the cue with my brother and my cousin and I noticed the big display on the front counter with the said salads and bags of fruit. I turned to my brother and cousin and said "when we were kids if we came to McDonalds and our parents bought us fruit we wouldn't of been happy, we'd had thought they were taking the piss. The whole idea of McDonalds is that its bad for you. This fruit business is not on." At which point the woman in front of me who I hadn't been paying any attention to turns round and says " well I'm buying him a doughnut aswell."
At this point I turned bright red and couldn't apologise enough trying to convince this woman that I wasn't having a dig at her. Whilst my brother and cousin were crying with laughter.
Anyway we got our food to take out
I was in the cue with my brother and my cousin and I noticed the big display on the front counter with the said salads and bags of fruit. I turned to my brother and cousin and said "when we were kids if we came to McDonalds and our parents bought us fruit we wouldn't of been happy, we'd had thought they were taking the piss. The whole idea of McDonalds is that its bad for you. This fruit business is not on." At which point the woman in front of me who I hadn't been paying any attention to turns round and says " well I'm buying him a doughnut aswell."
At this point I turned bright red and couldn't apologise enough trying to convince this woman that I wasn't having a dig at her. Whilst my brother and cousin were crying with laughter.
Anyway we got our food to take out
Jan 6th 2006, 5:18 pm
#40
Account Closed
Joined: Jun 2005
Posts: 2,630
Re: Most embarassing
Originally Posted by WendyC
K sent to all who posted their stories.
Keep it up guys
Wendy x
Keep it up guys
Wendy x
Went into work on Wednesday night. Saw my mate and gave him a really good a**e grab to say hello.
Only thing was it wasn't him
Jan 6th 2006, 5:35 pm
#41
Is it the weekend yet?
Joined: Feb 2005
Location: Thirroul, NSW
Posts: 1,619
Re: Most embarassing
Originally Posted by Hutch
Hmmm ... where to begin... I have many moments... ones that spring to mind:
Aged about 11 - chatting up a couple of very tasty girls down at the local open air swimming pool one hot summer's afternoon. All's going well, telling 'em a great joke, they start laughing, I laugh too - huge ****ing ball of yellow snot inflates out of my right nostril like a mucus beach ball - girls run off screaming in disgust - I pick up my towel and trudge back to my mates who have nearly passed out with laughter.
Aged 15 - got a date with a local hottie. We have a nice walk around the local common holding hands, sip a bit of Merrydown, then I walk her back to her house. On the doorstep I decide it's my big moment - go to kiss her french stylee - she keeps her mouth mainly shut - I lick her front teeth with my tongue. She goes "urrgggh - you just licked my teeth" and runs into the house. Tells everyone at school the next day and turns me into a laughing stock.
Aged about 17 - playing that round robin game of table tennis where about 20 of your circle the table taking a hit in turn. I get knocked out early on - decide to liven things up a bit. Charge up to table screaming "PITCH INVASION" - jump on it - whole thing closes up around like me like some sodding great sandwich. Several hundred six formers piss themselves laughing - especially when I emerge slightly concussed.
Aged about 19 - been down the pub with my mates - consume many beers. We all head back to my mate's girlfriend's place with about 10 other people. Someone puts a bit of music on and a joint gets passed around. My mate Andrew, as worse for wear as me, lifts his arse and lets loose a mighty fart. Much laughter. I can feel stirrings myself, so I rock back in my chair say "that's nothing!" - push out a fart and follow through with a plop of viscous properties. Sharon McCauseland goes "Urghh - he's ****ing shat himself" - I limp off to the bathroom - realise there's little I can do and sneak off home, enduring a two mile walk before I can clean myself up.
Aged about 11 - chatting up a couple of very tasty girls down at the local open air swimming pool one hot summer's afternoon. All's going well, telling 'em a great joke, they start laughing, I laugh too - huge ****ing ball of yellow snot inflates out of my right nostril like a mucus beach ball - girls run off screaming in disgust - I pick up my towel and trudge back to my mates who have nearly passed out with laughter.
Aged 15 - got a date with a local hottie. We have a nice walk around the local common holding hands, sip a bit of Merrydown, then I walk her back to her house. On the doorstep I decide it's my big moment - go to kiss her french stylee - she keeps her mouth mainly shut - I lick her front teeth with my tongue. She goes "urrgggh - you just licked my teeth" and runs into the house. Tells everyone at school the next day and turns me into a laughing stock.
Aged about 17 - playing that round robin game of table tennis where about 20 of your circle the table taking a hit in turn. I get knocked out early on - decide to liven things up a bit. Charge up to table screaming "PITCH INVASION" - jump on it - whole thing closes up around like me like some sodding great sandwich. Several hundred six formers piss themselves laughing - especially when I emerge slightly concussed.
Aged about 19 - been down the pub with my mates - consume many beers. We all head back to my mate's girlfriend's place with about 10 other people. Someone puts a bit of music on and a joint gets passed around. My mate Andrew, as worse for wear as me, lifts his arse and lets loose a mighty fart. Much laughter. I can feel stirrings myself, so I rock back in my chair say "that's nothing!" - push out a fart and follow through with a plop of viscous properties. Sharon McCauseland goes "Urghh - he's ****ing shat himself" - I limp off to the bathroom - realise there's little I can do and sneak off home, enduring a two mile walk before I can clean myself up.
Jan 6th 2006, 5:48 pm
#42
BE Forum Addict
Joined: Nov 2003
Location: Noosa Heads
Posts: 3,507
Re: Most embarassing
Originally Posted by Linda Lushardi
Now that you have privately explained to me what dogging is, i would like point out that i could be used to clear crowds by the police. Not pretty site
Jan 6th 2006, 5:54 pm
#43
BE Forum Addict
Joined: Nov 2003
Location: Noosa Heads
Posts: 3,507
Re: Most embarassing
Originally Posted by glittababe
Mine was at the gym. I was happily jogging away on the cross trainer, my co-ordination is crap so I had to concentrate. I looked up into the huge mirrors and noticed my ex boyfriend on the weights behine me and behind him his new girlfriend "given me the evils"! Well, after the hot flush, I lost all co-ordination completely (apparently I looked like a spider falling down a drainpipe) and fell off! After i composed myself I looked up to see her smirking at me, I nearly thumped her!
When we got back to my sisters, I told her what happened and she said "well he doesn't know what muff diving is", to which my 6 yr old worrying said "its when you dive into a womans vagina!" How embarrassing!
Jan 6th 2006, 5:55 pm
#44
Is it the weekend yet?
Joined: Feb 2005
Location: Thirroul, NSW
Posts: 1,619
Re: Most embarassing
Originally Posted by glittababe
Mine was at the gym. I was happily jogging away on the cross trainer, my co-ordination is crap so I had to concentrate. I looked up into the huge mirrors and noticed my ex boyfriend on the weights behine me and behind him his new girlfriend "given me the evils"! Well, after the hot flush, I lost all co-ordination completely (apparently I looked like a spider falling down a drainpipe) and fell off! After i composed myself I looked up to see her smirking at me, I nearly thumped her!
Jan 6th 2006, 5:58 pm
#45
BE Forum Addict
Joined: Nov 2003
Location: Noosa Heads
Posts: 3,507
Re: Most embarassing
Originally Posted by Anastasia Beaverhausen
LOL, reminds me of the guy next to me on the treadmill once. He was so busy checking himself out in the mirror that he lost co-ordination and fell. He flew off the treadmill and halfway across the room.
I think back now to how funny it must have seemed. Oh and ex boyfriend still goes to same gym, he's dumped the girl so he now has to deal with 2 of us giving him the evils! Its kind of karma, as we make him feel very very bad 