Looking for advice
 

Hi All

I'm very new to all of this so i do apologise if i'm asking questions that have been asked a million times before. My fiance and i are looking to move abroad. We have been looking at spain but as time goes on we are getting more and more negative feed back. Australia is somewhere we would both love to go but we both have the same concern 'not seeing our families that often' Can i ask how other people find this and do you have any regrets?

Re: Looking for advice
 

It completely depends on your relationships with your family and friends. I love my friends, and some of my family, to death but we have the sort of relationship that as long as we chat every so often, all is good. Others have a relationship - especially women with their mothers for example, where any sort of break is simply heart breaking and they either struggle like hell or give up after a few months. It's almost impossible to quantify but if you think you can cope without them, I sincerely hope it turns out you can. Many on here thought it would be a problem but not huge. Two months after moving they are desperately people sick, even people who didn't think there would be a problem at all have been amazed at the level of heartache they suffer.

It's a biggy. Good luck.

Re: Looking for advice
 

My husband and I moved cross-country 17 years ago and I was desperately homesick/peoplesick from the moment I got on the plane. I sobbed uncontrollably for weeks, then only sporadically for the next 3 years until we were able to move back. 15 years later we moved to the other side of the world. Don't miss a single thing or person. I'm in regular email contact with my parents and that's just fine with us.

Re: Looking for advice
 

Many thanks for your replies. My partner and i are used to being away from home. We were both in the forces (he still is), i'm now living in England and my family are all up in Scotland. However, moving to Australia would be something completely different. I'm pretty sure i would be ok, i'm not much of a home bird anyway but i'm not sure about my partner. The only thing that concerns me is my daughter. She's 1 year old and my family find it difficult not seeing her as it is. I think i'd feel guilty taking her all the way to Australia. Did anyone else feel like this?

Re: Looking for advice
 

My mother in law gave us the "but you're taking my grandchildren away from us" line, but we just told her "no, we're taking OUR children with us".

Why would you feel guilty for your decisions? Ask yourself some questions...Are you doing something wrong in wanting to move? Is Australia what you want? Who's life/child is it?

Re: Looking for advice
 

Thanks Dorothy. I guess you're right. I just want to do whats best for us and my daughter. So can i ask you a quesion? Do you feel that moving to Australia was best for you and your kids?

Re: Looking for advice
 

It sounds odd but in a way they will see her more. With web cams, MSN etc etc you are more able to stay in contact than perhaps you would when you are in the same country? Then you tend to do visits every few months. When you're in Aus you obviously can't so all phonecalls can be done with Skype, webcams etc. I don't know how many people do that with each other in the UK but I would imagine it less the closer in mileage you are.

My mother ran with the 'taking the grandkids away' until my daughter pointed out that she took precious little interest when we lived five minutes away - what was going to change ;)

Re: Looking for advice
 

Thanks moneypen. Can i also ask you if your life is better since you've moved to Australia?

Re: Looking for advice
 

I think so :blink: Our lives in the UK were pretty damn good, only downer was hours hubby was working - 90+ per week. We still have a pretty damn good lifestyle with the added bonus of hubby now working 40 hours a week for the same money - no brainer. Weather is a biggy for us - I used to spend winter being in bed with a migraine or in a bath trying to get warm :lol: The sunshine helps me a huge amount. Miss friends and the odd family member but not enough to ever wonder if we've done the right thing ;)

Re: Looking for advice
 

Couldn't have better myself :thumbsup:

Re: Looking for advice
 

Sorry for not replying earlier. The dog needed walking and seeing how I was the only one home it fell to me to do it.

Yes, I think our lives are better here. My husband no longer commutes 2-3 hours each way, which is a big bonus for us. I have had some really interesting jobs since being here which has been a real ego boost for me. I'm currently waiting to hear if I am going to be hired full time in the position I've been doing as a temp for the past 3.5 months. Our kids have made friends, we have a nice home, made good friends. Mainly it's the slower pace of life we enjoy. Our life before was very busy and fast paced. The slow pace is really nice for our little family.

I think Moneypen and I are very similar in how we see things. It's been a good move for us for the same reasons as for her, although we're on different sides of the country.

Re: Looking for advice
 

Thanks eveyone for your advice, it has definately given me a lot to think about.:thumbsup: