I want to go home
 

I know we 've been here under 3 weeks and that's just not lnog enought I know to give the country a go. We planned for this to be our new life but I'm finding things just too hard. My partner loves it here and is so interested in his job. I've also got a teaching job starting in a couple of weeks. The animals are in quaratine for a couple of weeks. I know I should give it a go but I'm just so unhappy and have lost all of my confidence I just don't know what to do anymore. My partner says I would be walking out on him but it's not that. I love him so much I just can't do the Australia thing but didn't realise this really till I got here. The only way I can stay is if I think I'm going home at the end of the year. How do we go about shipping pets back to the UK - they have pet passports but no rabies vaccinations as that was not a requirement for Australia. Advice and help needed please. :confused: :scared:

Re: I want to go home
 

After 3 weeks??? - are you mad?

Re: I want to go home
 

Totally crazy w ehave all felt like that and you proberbly will for the next 2-3 years on & off.Good luck. :beer:

Re: I want to go home
 

Thats harsh, shes having a hard time adjusting.
People are here for support Scared, just log in and chat away.

Re: I want to go home
 

I can relate to all your feelings...I've done 4yrs in the USA and still feel the same.....good luck :) hopefully when you start work you'll meet some people and that will help you settle in

Re: I want to go home
 

You will feel better once animals out of quarrentine and you start your new job, you are probably thinking about it all too much, you wont be missing much at home believe me! You can always go home again in 2 years once you have stuck it out and given it a chance, just see it as a 2 years stint and then assess at the end if you wanna go home or not then.

Good luck

Laura

Re: I want to go home
 

Hold on a second here.........

Maybe a bit of advice will down down well rather than ridicule......

I myself am not there yet but sometimes wake up in a cold sweat thinking of things that could go wrong or if it is the right move. Time to be a bit supportive rather than rip apart. Perhaps if there are any people who felt like that as well after that amount of time, it would help to hear from them and perhaps how they got over it?

Hope you get it sorted.......

Good Luck :)

Re: I want to go home
 

I know this time will be extremely difficult for you as you're likely to have left all of your friends, family, creature comforts and your familiar environment, but do you think you might be able to hang on a bit longer?

The whole process must have been a long winded one as we're all experiencing however 3 weeks is still very early to make such rational decisions. Maybe if you gave yourself a certain length of time to adjust (e.g. few months, 6 months, a year or longer) and then if you reach it and you're still unhappy you can re-evaluate your position.

Have you had chance to meet new people yet?
Maybe some get togethers would help you settle in??

I hope you do start to feel better soon and if you give it a bit longer and you're still not settled at least you can say 'i tried it and it wasn't for me' and leave with no regrets!!

I hope everything works out for you and you start to feel better soon no matter which decision you make!! xxx

Karma sent chuck!
Mish xxx

Re: I want to go home
 

No they're probably very sane and very brave to bring this to this forum. I moved to Newcastle (70 miles away) once and hated it spent 6 months there and never settled, wouldn't go back if you paid me £1000. I spent time up there with friends before hand but visit and living in very different. I knew in first 2 days I'd never settle and I didn't. Hope I don't feel that way once in Aus.

Please don't judge others for having doubts or being very sure of how they feel.

Hopefully we can get some helpful comments to help them sort out moving back or breaking it to partner that they're unhappy.

My advice would be to discuss with partner and give it a year, if it's still the same then try to hold out until you get citizenship, then go home as you'll be able to change your mind if you want to at a later date!!!

Re: I want to go home
 

I reckon under 3 weeks and you are still adjusting to the climate, cultural changes and jet lag which can last longer in some than others.

Please dont make this major decision under the stress you are under now.

Home takes time to build, as do decent friendships.

You are doing three of the most stressful things you can do to yourself, moving house, moving country and starting a new job.

so be kind to yourself.

As someone said, once your pets come out of quarantine and you start a new job, you may well feel better.

Just rest up and adapt slowly to your surroundings until you start your new job.

Take one day at a time and take it slowly.

You cant feel at home this soon, if that were the case then Australia would be too much like the UK and nobody would take the leap in emigrating.

You will be fine, just believe in yourself.

(big hug)

Sam

Re: I want to go home
 

It's perfectly normal to feel the way you are at the moment. When I first arrived in the US I cried everyday for two months.....I hated it. Gradually as I got over the culture shock things started looking up.

Give it some time and don't be so hard on yourself....... it WILL get better.

Sue

Re: I want to go home
 

Yeah, but come on - 3 weeks and not settled - of course!!! anyone expecting to be 'settled' in 3 weeks would be off the mark I think (although there will be exceptions) but it takes ages to go through the process of emigrating - you've had ages to think it through, apply etc, but you want to chuck it after 3 weeks???

I stand by my original comment and will take it on the chin for those who don't agree. All of this 'there, there, there' doesn't really help does it - if she's like this after 3 weeks then maybe going back to the Uk is the thing to do. I don't like to see anyone fail in anything, but let's put all the touchy feely stuff to one side and say that 3 weeks is nowhere near long eough to say "well I gave it a go" Fair enough in 12 months or so if it's stil not working you can say that.

Re: I want to go home
 

seriously - give it a chance and find out when the next get together in your area is. There's a girls night out in Mewlbourne sometime soon - and that way you can talk to the girls with complete honesty.

Folk on the forum are mostly very supportive and willing to help out. I would do as some of the others have said and set yourself a time limit or a date to re-evaluate the move (we said 2 years), make it long enough to really give yourself a chance to get to know the place, but not so long that you hate being here and have made yourself sick. If you want someone to talk to send me a PM. (Its Pam sending this message)


Oh, where in oz are you based?

Re: I want to go home
 

I think most people would say that they feel like this (to a greater or lesser extent) in the settling in period.

We came on a 2 year temp visa and knowing that helped me survive--in the first 6 months I desperately wanted to go home. After 6 months or so, 2 years didn't seem so bad- in fact it was a good length of time to be here.
then my visa was extended for another year- 3 years seemed a perfect time to stay.
I was offered another 3 year contract and realised that this is where I wanted to be, and UK is a great place, and my (lovely) family are there, as are my friends, but if I went to UK I would miss this lifestyle, the friends I have made here.

Basically I think you have to give yourself goals- maybe plan a visit to UK for spring next year (you will be surprised at how quickly time passes) or say you will re-assess how you feel after 2 years here.

I really hope you start feeling better- I would imagine once your dog is with you anf the first day in the new job is over, you will feel that much better- maybe not great- but better than now.

Good luck

Re: I want to go home
 

You don't walk in her shoes. Culture shock, no matter how much you think you have prepared, can hit really hard.