eddie007

Maybe I'm becoming paranoid... But there are things missing from my house....

Worst thing is... I know only one person who might help themselves, and know why they would be attracted to them... If that makes sense... I know she has "borrowed" things before and only returned them when I've mentioned them specifically... And no its NOT my memory... They were things that I would NEVER have leant to anyone... For personal, maybe bizarre, Sentimental reasons.... outwardly quite common things.... But things that are very meaningful to me....

A gold pair of stork embroidery scossors that were my Grans... She returned after I asked her whether I had leant them to her.... Run of the mill, nothing special... I have a half a dozen pairs of scissors almost exactly similar.... But only ONE pair that I am attached to... And I know every mark on them...

Likewise... My fabric stash... Its like children... You know them... You know if there is something amiss

Yes you think I'm crazy.... But I know for sure certain treasured pieces have gone after her visits... Pieces of fabric that have "meaning" that are waiting for the right quilt to be made.... I can go to my stash and locate ANY specific piece ..... Even though it appears really disorganised.... There have been gaps...

Fabric is Like favourite books on a shelf.... Ones you dont lend out... Ones you instinctively know if some one has moved them.... You may have a bookcase of a thousand books, but you know every one of them.... There ARE "other" fabrics... Ones I happily share.... Ones I dont "love" but just "use"

I always keep my stock of new blades in a specific draw...along with other cutting tools... A new blade for my roller cutter is a "treat" for me... I have several packs of them because I bulk brought them at a good price... She came to visit and they ALL disappeared.... I phoned her and asked her whether she had seen where I had put them, as " I must have moved them last time she was round when we were in my sewing room....".....she was too busy to talk, but She offerd to help me look the next time she came round and they magically appeared..... Stuffed between quilt kits ..on the other side of the room....

Made no sense...

At the time

Unfortunately now it does.

I'm really sad about this... Because we were friends... I have been exceptionally generous to her with my quilting things...given freely... Perhaps to the point where she feels entitled to help herself to what she wants?

I dont know....

I do know that tonight I cancelled her coming over to quilt and I will be unavailable in future


And no, its not the kids... They dont quilt.... Or ever go into my sewing room... Let alone magic away pieces of fabric....

Jaycee1

Oh my
I just don't know what to say! I mean... what can you say?
I do think you have done the right thing in cancelling your arrangement but OMG to think a friend could be like that?
Its probably more frustrating because if you are anything like me, had she asked for a blade or to use/borrow scissors you would have said yes without thinking!
I deeply feel for you, not only has this person stolen from you but the trust and friendship too...
I just don't have the words... but I do know on here you are a warm and generous person who is always happy to help.
Don't let this person break your beautiful spirit x x x
J x

Bernieboy

If i was you i'd quilt while i was ahead

Cheetah7

I am really upset for you and sorry if this sounds harsh but there is no explanation or justification for what this person has done.

I hope you get the stuff back and then if she does ever come round, is there any way you can secure your stuff and perhaps leave something you know she will steal with a message hidden somewhere in it like 'You took this from my house, you are no longer my friend and I do not want to see you again'.

No excuse for her to do this to you Eddie, you must be so upset.

Pollyana

How close are you as friends? I mean, sometimes friends are so close that you can say things between you that would earn anyone else a smack in the mouth, and sometimes it takes a friend that close to break through barriers and get to the bottom of what's happening.
Is she the sort of friend that you could sit down with and say "look pal I think there's something troubling you, this and this have happened, and it can only be down to you - so tell me WHY? Whats troubling you? Why are you doing this?" Not in an accusational way, but in a "look, somethings up, lets face it together" way

Bernieboy

I have to agree with Eds,i know a 'friend' who has secretly stashed/hidden a lot of my stuff about their house in oz,sometimes some of it find's it was back to me,as for the rest,well we wait n see

Pollyana

Hope you get it back, meantime there are ten battered cardboard boxes on their way to London from my place, not sure they'll make it in one piece, the stuff has been in them a long time

Bernieboy

You donating to yer old bra's to the old donkey retreat for feeding bags

Pollyana

Get plenty of hay in them, there was a time when you wanted to use them as parachutes

Bernieboy

Cutbacks in the French armed forces

Pollyana

Well I have to hold out for a good price, and if the French can't afford to pay for my underwear, I shall sell it elsewhere

eddie007

Not that good i'm sorry to say....and I dont feel like investing anything more of me into it... Maybe its the whole immigration experience.. Getting hardfaced and being able to walk away...

if anyone was getting smacked in the face ..... It might be her.... Not that i'm angry... the whole thing makes me sad around the edges.... but i havevthe potential to get angry... its simply not worth it... taking the easy way out and walking away...... My excess energy for devoting to "difficult" relationships is deffo for HIM, the kids and the grey nomads.... Gone are the days where I can cope with challenging behaviour "for the good of the cause"......

Pollyana

No, sounds like walking away could be the better option. The "rescue" option does need both of you to be in the right mindset, as I'm sure you know, and to be close enough to deal with whatever is said.
Sad could be a better emotion for you than anger, just a shame it comes to that
Onwards and upwards Eddie look after yourself

Bernieboy

Tis sad,things ain't quilt what they used to be

eddie007

Although i have known for ages i have been denying it, until she showed me a quilt she has just finished... when you see a piece that you've dyed, painted and customised yourself... And have been saving for a number of years .... Well.. Since before Kevin was born and i was doing that kind of hippyshit thang...Sorry...

Ah well... Onwards and upwards.....

Thank the Fat man with the big belly that i'm over the saving people/rescueing/crusader syndrome that i used to suffer from